


A Year in the Life

by alatariel_gildaen



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - British, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Oral Sex, Romance, Romantic Comedy, Sex Toys, Sexual Content, vegan!peeta
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-06
Updated: 2015-03-05
Packaged: 2017-12-28 14:40:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 58,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/993089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alatariel_gildaen/pseuds/alatariel_gildaen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It hadn't been her plan to fall for him but his unending goodness won out. As soon as they met it became inevitable. This is a series of snapshots following Peeta & Katniss' first year together as their relationship develops into something real. Modern AU sequel to Sabotaged Heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Summer's Best of Weather

**Author's Note:**

> Huge thank yous to Court81981 for being an amazing Beta :)

## August

"So, what did you think?"

Katniss seemed to be choosing her words carefully. "Well, it could have been worse."

He couldn't quite believe what he was hearing. "Well, of course it could have been worse. When something is perfection, it could only be worse."

"I think 'perfection' is something of an exaggeration."

_Back to the Future_ had just ended, the credits were rolling and Peeta had turned to the woman curled up next to him, a boyish grin on his face, expecting to see a similar expression on hers. Instead he saw her brow knitted slightly in confusion, evaporating that hope in an instant.

"You didn't like it."

"It's not that. I mean it was fun, I just… I don't really get it."

"What's not to get?" he asked, slightly exasperated.

"Well," she began slowly, clearly not wanting to offend him when their delicate connection had only just been rebuilt, "logically it just doesn't make any sense."

Laughing in earnest he said, "Of course it doesn't make _logical_ sense. It's about time travel!"

"Yes," she agreed, "but even within those parameters, it doesn't make logical sense."

"Why not?"

"Well, for a start, he goes back in time and prevents his mother and father meeting. The second he stopped his mother and father meeting he should have ceased to exist, which would mean that he wouldn't get the chance to go back in time and stop them meeting. In trying to stop his dad getting hit by the car he would have immediately created a paradox that could potentially have destroyed the universe."

"Would have made a pretty shit film though. Generally speaking when I'm watching a film, I like there to at least be a tiny part of the universe in it. Not, you know, _nothing._ "

"I know, but even ignoring that gaping scientific flaw there are so many bits that just couldn't have happened. Like, he's carrying around this photo of his family. But they start to fade so they no longer exist in the photo. But the photo still exists. So who took it, why did they take a photo of that door with no one stood in front of it, and how has it come to be in Marty's possession?"

"I don't understand wha-"

"And ok, he manages to change the past. Which means he would have been raised by the 'cool' versions of his parents, right? His brother and sister are completely different people now, so why does that photo still show them as the doofuses they were in the parallel world? And how come Marty has turned out the same? I know there's a certain amount of 'nature versus nurture' in the way we turn out, but if his brother and sister are such completely different people, why isn't he? And if it's because he came from the other parallel 1985, why isn't there a version of him who _was_ raised in that world? And don't you think it's an absolutely amazing coincidence that in the alternate timeline, even with their different lives happening, with his dad becoming an author instead of working in that office with Biff still bullying him, Marty's parents must have decided to have unprotected sex at the exact same moment in time so that those precise same sperm cells could meet with the precise same eggs and create those children. And really? One punch in the face turned Biff from being that crazed potential rapist bully in to a fawning puppy dog? It literally makes _no_ sense."

"It's just supposed to be a bit of fun, Katniss," he said, trying not to dwell on the now obvious flaws that he had never really thought of before, and thinking that if she found that much wrong with the first film, the second one would be likely to give her an embolism.

"I know, and it was fun. It just doesn't make any _logical_ sense. If you have to include something like time travel, you should at least try to make it make sense, like in _Harry Potter._ "

"Oh come off it!" he cried. "If you're talking about the third film it makes as much sense as _Back to the Future!_ "

She shook her head vehemently. "No," she replied, "It's totally different. It shows you that you simply can't change the past. The past has already happened and there is nothing you can do to alter it."

"But they _do_ alter it," he protested. "They stopped that bird thing being killed, that was the whole point of them going back in time."

"Yes, but they had _always_ saved him. Their future selves were always going to be at that point in time to stop him being killed. They didn't actually _change_ anything."

"Yes they did," he said adamantly. "That executioner killed him."

"Did it ever actually show him dying?" Katniss asked.

Peeta racked his memory before answering. "No, but it was a kids' film, they're not going to show something as violent as a beheading. But they showed the kids' reactions. He was killed, definitely."

"Peeta," Katniss said patiently, "Have you ever read the books?"

"No, I don't have time to read."

"Rubbish! You've got filled bookshelves at home, I've seen them!"

"Graphic novels and comics, Katniss. It's quicker to read pictures than words."

"Well, you should make time. And make _Harry Potter_ your number one priority. It was much better explained in the books than in the films. No, Buckbeak was never killed because Harry and Hermione were always there to save him. When Harry thinks he sees his father save him and Sirius across the lake, it was his future self. During that time there were _always_ two Harrys and two Hermiones hanging around."

He closed his eyes and tried to process that information. "Nope," he said after a little while. "No, too hungover to understand that right now. I think we should just have to agree to disagree on this one."

"Wait, you made me watch this, you can't get out of reading _Potter_. It's a fair exchange."

"One film for seven books isn't a fair exchange"

"Believe me, Peeta, you'll thank me."

His phone beeped with an incoming text message, saving him from having to answer. A one-word message from Finnick that read, _'Well?'_ The time on his phone read 21:41, and he hadn't as yet told either Finn or Annie what had happened. "I need to make a call," he said, disentangling himself from her embrace.

"It's getting late. Do you want me to order dinner?"

"That would be amazing."

"What do you fancy?"

"Other than you?"

She rolled her eyes and said, "To eat?"

"Can I get away with saying 'you' again?"

"Peeta…."

He thought about it a moment. There was no way his stomach would cope with anything too elaborate at the moment. "Pizza?"

"Pizza?" She sounded sceptical.

"Yeah. No cheese, obviously, and can you make sure there's no egg or milk in the base?"

She let out a long exhalation of breath. "It seems like a tall order, but I'll see what I can find."

"Thank you," he replied, indicating that he was going out into the hallway to make the call.

It only took one and a half rings before Finnick answered. Before his best mate was able to lay in to him for leaving it so late to call, Peeta spoke up.

"I know it's late, I'm a jerk, and I'm sorry."

"Where the hell are you? What's going on? Is everything ok?"

"I'm fine. I'm… I'm staying here tonight."

A moment of silence before his friend spoke again. "You know we're working tomorrow, right?"

"I know. But it's fine. I'll be back early, you won't have to do a thing, I promise."

"Is this a good idea, Peet?"

"I think so. We're gonna start again."

He heard Finnick's slow exhalation down the phone. "I'm glad it went well, Peet. Don't get hurt."

"I won't"

"Good. Don't."

"I won't. I'll see you tomorrow, ok?"

"Sure thing, bud. Have fun."

Katniss voice came through from the living room. "Peeta? Come here a sec."

"Gotta go, mate. See you in the morning."

"Don't be late, Peeta, or I'll kick your scrawny little arse in. See you."

After tucking his phone in to his jeans pocket he returned to Katniss, who was sat cross legged on her couch, the home phone tucked under one ear. "I found these guys," she said, one hand over the phone's mouthpiece, the other extending towards Peeta, offering him the menu. "It's sourdough pizza, and they've assured me the bases are ok. What do you want?"

Peeta took the menu from her, scanning it quickly. There were three vegetarian pizzas and the one that caught his eye was the Spicy Deluxe; garlic, onion, jalapenos, sun dried tomatoes, roasted red peppers, aubergine and spinach. His mouth began to salivate at the thought of the first proper food he'd had all day.

Taking a seat next to her, he pointed his choice out to Katniss who nodded. "Same here." He rested his hand on her thigh as she took her hand away from the mouthpiece. "Two Vegetarian Spicy Deluxes, one with no cheese." She listened for a moment then said, "No, one with _no_ cheese…. Why not?" She looked at the menu again, her brows knitting. "Ok, I see it… Ok, but doing it that way, it'll cost an extra fiver…..But it's exactly the same in every other way…..You can't charge more for less, it's criminal….."

"What's wrong?" Peeta asked her. Now that the prospect of food had appeared on the horizon he was realising just how hungry he was and didn't need any added delays to it.

"Just a second," she said to the person on the other end of the phone, shaking her head as she did and replacing her hand over the mouthpiece, a look of sheer disbelief on her face. "They're saying that having it without cheese is going off menu, so you have to have it as a customised one. They do a cheeseless margarita pizza, so they're saying you have to order that, and order the individual toppings as extras. And they cost a quid each, so instead of it being an eight pound pizza, it's going to cost thirteen."

"Well that doesn't make sense."

"That's what I keep saying!"

"Ugh, Katniss, I'm too hungover to deal with that kind of nonsense, if it's too much effort I'll just have the plain one."

"But that's not what you _want_ is it?"

"Well, no, but-"

"Then don't just settle for crap, don't let them walk over you, leave it with me."

He felt the corners of his mouth twitch upwards ever so slightly. "Is this some kind of valuable life lesson you're trying to give me?"

With a returned smile she replied, "Take it that way if you like. I just hate bureaucracy, and that's all this is. Bloody jobsworth." Returning her attention to the person on the other end of the phone, she said, "Hi, yes, you're not going to charge us extra. You're just going to give us the pizza we want, but without cheese….. ..I don't care if there isn't a button for that option on your till, you make the pizzas fresh, right? So, when you make one of them just don't put it on, it's really very simple….That really isn't any of my concern…. Just tell him….Ok, look, do you have a pen and paper? You do? Ok, good, put it through on your till as a regular Vegetarian Spicy Deluxe, then write an actual physical note using that pen and paper to the chef to leave off the cheese….. My friend here is highly allergic to dairy, so if our specifications aren't followed to the letter we'll know and you'll be hearing from us further…... Thank you…. Forty five minutes? Perfect, thank you."

After placing the phone back on the hook she turned to Peeta. "Don't let people walk all over you, ok? I know I'm guilty of it, I daresay given recent events I'm more guilty of it than most, but that ends now."

A small chuckle escaped his throat. It did seem a little strange to be taking advice on self-confidence from the woman who had almost knocked his long recovery back to square one. Although he couldn't help but be plagued by at least one worry. "You know they'll probably have spat in it after you spoke to them that way."

"What we don't know can't harm us, Peeta."

"I guess. Unless they're carrying a highly infectious disease."

"Well, if we're still alive in the morning, then I guess we're safe."

"Look, if we're gonna die, I need to get home first. Otherwise Finnick will kill me."

At his words the two of them burst in to laughter, and with their arms around each other fell back on to the couch. Peeta felt such comfort in her warm weight pressed against him; the turmoil of the previous week and a half already beginning to feel like something that had happened in a half forgotten nightmare. The feeling could be recalled but not the details. Closing his eyes and pulling her closer in to him he began to idly trail his fingers up and down her back, feeling his heart rate quicken as he did. A small, contented sigh escaped her lips, and Peeta felt the heat of her breath warming his chest through the fabric of his t-shirt.

His lips brushed over the top of her head and in response she tightened her grip on the front of his clothes. She lifted her head off his chest and their gaze met for a moment before she gently pressed her lips into his. It didn't take long for the softness of their kisses to grow into something more desperate, Katniss winding her hands in to Peeta's hair, drawing his bottom lip into her mouth and gently scraping her teeth along the sensitive flesh. His body began to react to her and as he gently rolled his hips up to meet her she moaned her approval in to him. One of her hands slid down his torso, drifting ever lower, coming to rest over the very apparent bulge in his jeans.

"Don't mind me." Johanna's voice cut through them, jolting them back to reality as she sat down heavily in the armchair. They held each other's dilated gaze, breathless, and Peeta couldn't help but feel the sinking disappointment at their interruption. "My turn for control of the TV. _The Only Way is Essex_ is about to start."

"Jo, you do watch some real shit, you know that?"

"Be grateful _Big Brother_ isn't on at the moment."

"I am, believe me. Every single day."

Katniss laid her head back down on Peeta's chest and he took the opportunity to shift his hips slightly to make his erection less visible to Jo. The shift in his position pressed his arousal further into Katniss' side and in response she began to draw lazy circles over his collarbone with her fingertips. Their hearts hammered in their chests and Peeta was uncertain where his drumming pulse ended and hers began. He was so comfortable. So warm, and comfortable. And despite the nap they had taken that afternoon, tired too. It was becoming more and more difficult to keep his eyes open and as the Essex girls on the television droned on, his mind began to slow down as much as his body.

A shift in Katniss' warm weight against brought him back to consciousness as she sat up straight. He moaned a little at the lack of contact and tried to pull her back in to him, although her words woke his mind and body immediately. "Pizza's here. You'll have to let go of me if you want it."

He didn't need asking twice. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes he sat up and swinging his legs around to the front, he at once fell back against the cushions as a wave of dizziness threatened to overcome him. He brought his eyes into focus on the television and immediately wished he hadn't. While _The Only Way is Essex_ had finished, Jo was now watching _I'm a Celebrity_ and a pair of hapless Z-listers were sitting down to eat a meal of still living witchitty grubs and raw kangaroo testicles. "Shit, Jo, change the channel, we're about to eat," he gasped, averting his eyes, clutching his stomach and desperately fighting the nausea that rapidly rose up inside him.

"Spoilsport," she chuckled, just as Katniss re-entered the room.

"Turn this shit, off Jo. How you can watch this and actually have the audacity to call me 'brainless' I'll never understand."

With an exasperated sigh Jo switched channels, allowing them to watch the much less appetite-ruining QI while they ate.

"So… tomorrow…." Peeta said, as soon as he swallowed his last mouthful of pizza.

"What about tomorrow?"

"Will you be sticking around once you've dropped me off?"

"Well," she said, her voice thoughtful and delicate, "It is a long way to go. I don't know if I'd want to get straight back in the car after such a long drive."

"I wouldn't want to send you straight on your way, anyway."

"That's good to hear," she replied, a faint pink tinge creeping across her cheeks. "I'm wondering if it's better to come a little prepared. Maybe bring a change of clothes? I don't want to get caught out again, like last time…."

She was insinuating that she may be in for a long stay again. And Peeta found that he was entirely ok with that. "You know, I don't mind you wearing my clothes," he said with a grin.

"If you two are going to be discussing your kinky sex life, either take it elsewhere or get me involved," Jo piped up. "I know which I'd prefer," she finished with a lewd wink.

"I'm not entirely sure I'm too happy sharing Katniss with anyone, to be honest," he countered. "Definitely not now I've got her back." His hand found hers, their fingers intertwining together before he leant in towards her for a kiss.

"Ugh, ok, I'm done. Sex talk I can handle. This mushy shit, no way. You two want to carry on like that, you do it in your own time, not on my watch."

Ignoring Jo, Katniss squeezed Peeta's hand slightly. "What time do you need to get back tomorrow?"

He thought about it a moment. Finn would need to leave his no later than 8:30 if he was to get to his job as a swimming instructor at a local pool for a 9 a.m. start. But if he left it that late to come home his best mate would probably be on the verge of a nervous breakdown. No, he'd need to return a lot earlier than that if he wanted to live to see another day.

"Um, probably about 7, to be honest."

She let out a long sigh just as Jo snorted, "Yeah, good luck with that."

"Will that be ok?" Peeta asked, worry creeping in to the edges of his voice.

The pause she gave before answering made his stomach drop even further. "It'll be tough, but yeah. Doable. Just. We'll have to leave here about quarter past 5, though."

"That's ok."

"For you, maybe. I'll need help in the morning. And we should probably go to bed sooner rather than later."

"Jesus, you two, seriously, if you want to get in each other's knickers then just fuck off and do it, don't make out like you need an excuse," said Jo, rolling her eyes.

Without missing a single beat and without breaking Katniss' eye contact, Peeta said, "If we don't need an excuse, take me straight to bed."

"It would make sense, if we have to be up early."

"Ugh, god, get the fuck out of here! Go!"

Katniss chuckled as she stood up, holding her hand out towards him. With a smile he took hold of her as she helped him to his feet and led him away from Jo's knowing smirks. "It was good seeing you again, Jo," he said, pausing in the doorway. "We'll probably be gone before you get up tomorrow, so-"

"Get out of my sight and get her into bed, Loverboy."

He grinned as he allowed himself to be led away once again. Once sequestered away in her room, Katniss turned to him and placed a hand on his chest. His heart began to race at her touch. Wordlessly she slid her hands up over his body and around his neck, claiming his lips with her own. He melted in to her and deepened the kiss, probing her mouth with his tongue while his hands drifted lower over her body, coming to rest over her backside.

She pulled away from him with a little gasp as she caught her breath, taking his hands in her own and walking backwards until she reached the bed. She spun him around and pushed him down on to the bed before beginning to undress. He swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat before pulling his t-shirt up and over his head. The sight of her in her underwear, dropping to her knees in front of him, sent a spasm of pleasure straight to his cock, leaving him entirely breathless.

His eyes fluttered closed as she began to undo the button fly on his jeans and his breath hitched in his throat as she encouraged him to lift his hips before pulling his jeans down. "Can this come off again?" she asked, indicating his leg.

It still felt strange to him, allowing her to see him without his prosthetic. Just a couple of months prior, the idea of anyone seeing him that way was an absurd fantasy, something he couldn't foresee that he would ever allow. And now here he was, acquiescing to her request. After removing the leg and rolling off the liner he lay back against her pillows and put his arms out for her to join him. She rested her head against his chest as he buried his face in her hair.

"I don't ever want to have to move," he said, his voice slightly muffled by the top of her head.

Outside the rain picked up again, beating its relentless tattoo against her bedroom window and Peeta was beyond thankful to be indoors, in the warm and dry, with the woman of his dreams curled up in his arms. He looked at Katniss' bedside alarm clock. It was just before eleven o'clock. They would have to leave in a little over six hours if they were to get back to his on time, and knowing how bad Katniss was at early mornings that would mean settling down for the night now.

With a deep sigh he said, "Do you want to get under the covers?"

"Doesn't sound like you want to."

"Katniss, I want to stay up all night banging you senseless, but I need you to be able to drive tomorrow."

"You don't think I can do both?"

He chuckled, a deep rumbling sound which resonated through his chest and into Katniss, into her resting head, causing her to chuckle in response. "No, Katniss, I don't think you can do both. I've seen you in the morning, don't forget."

She playfully pushed him away in mock offense. "Stop it. It's not too late for me to throw you out."

"You wouldn't."

"Do you really want to push your luck?"

He held her even tighter, his arms wrapped around her and pinning her to his body. "I don't want to do anything to risk losing you again."

He felt her breath, warm against his chest, as she sighed. "Peeta, you won't lose me. But you're probably right. I need sleep if I'm going to be human in the morning."

"Don't worry, I'll wake you up when I need to."

"You'll make me coffee?"

"Better than that," he said, his hands drifting lower, squeezing her backside gently. "I'll wake you up in a way that'll give you a grin all day."

"Sounds great," she beamed. "I look forward to it." She rolled over and set her alarm clock. "I'm setting it for four, and we'll need to be up by half past. Is half an hour enough for this wake-up call?"

"Should be ok."

She reached up and kissed him deeply while he held her close, his heart pounding harder and faster than ever. As they climbed under the covers, and Peeta threw his arm over her, spooning her back, he couldn't believe his own luck. He'd gone to bed the night before, desperately drunk, depressed and alone, unsure if he would ever see Katniss' smile again, worried that he was doomed to a life of solitude, and now here he was, cuddling the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. His eyes fluttered closed, a slight smile on his lips as he allowed his body to drift off to the first peaceful sleep he'd had since discovering the initial truth behind Katniss' motivations for being with him.

Almost as soon as his eyes closed the alarm awoke him with a jolt. He could hear Katniss quietly protesting with a few sleepy moans as he reached over her body to turn the alarm off. Despite how dark it was outside, he was instantly awake. These early morning starts were ingrained in him since childhood.

"Katniss?" he said softly, trying to gently rouse her. Tendrils of hair were cascading over her face and neck, and he tenderly swept them to one side so his lips could connect with the soft skin hidden underneath. As he kissed a line down the side of her neck, she rolled on to her back, and Peeta placed his hands either side of her, supporting his weight as he watched the sleeping goddess beneath him. "Katniss?" he tried once more, placing his lips on hers. She stirred slightly underneath him, her eyes opening momentarily before fluttering closed once again. "Katniss?" he tried again, a little louder this time, before pressing his lips to her pulse point, sucking the skin, laving it with his tongue and dipping his head lower, leaving a trail of kisses in his wake.

He was rewarded for his efforts with a sleepy, contented mewling sound as Katniss brought her hand up to rest against the back of Peeta's head. "Katniss? I need you to wake up, beautiful." He dropped his lips to her collarbone and began to leave a path of kisses ever lower. When he reached her abdomen he heard her whisper, "Peeta," as her fingertips gently massaged into his scalp.

Taking encouragement from her pleasured sighs he dared to venture even lower, hooking his fingers over the waistband of her underwear and pulling them down. It was a bit awkward as Katniss was still half asleep and not helping him at all, but with a bit of effort he managed to wiggle them down past her hips and pulled them free of her legs. The languid smile that spread over her face as he pushed her legs apart and settled in between her knees made his stomach do backflips. "Katniss? This is your early morning wake-up call." Her dipped his head to the apex between her thighs and deftly ran his tongue over her folds.

Her sharp inhalation of breath coupled with her increased grip on his hair told him that his method of rousing her was working. "Oh, Peeta," she gasped as his tongue expertly circled over her clit. His cock was already hard, and he desperately wanted to bury himself inside her, to lose himself as he sought comfort within her, but the sight of her beneath him, the sounds she made as she came, the taste of her, and the sheer eroticism of pleasuring her was just as exciting to him.

He became aware that Katniss' breathing had quickened, that her hips were beginning to roll in time with his ministrations. Bringing his hand into play, he pushed two fingers inside her and curled them forward as he sucked on her clit. Immediately she grasped hold of her pillow and brought it over her face to muffle her cries. It was almost enough to send him spiralling over the edge himself. As her thighs clamped down around either side of his face and her smothered cries rang out, he continued to pump her with his fingers while lapping at her slick folds until he felt her hand on his forehead pushing him away. He slowly withdrew his fingers before sucking at the moisture that clung to them, then crawled up the bed to lie back down beside her, a wide grin on his face. "Morning," he said. "How are you feeling?"

"Mmmm. Far happier than I have any right to be feeling at such a godforsaken hour."

He smiled at the sight of her, basking in the afterglow of her orgasm as he cupped the side of her face and brought her lips to his. "You ready to get up?"

"What about you?" she replied, flicking on her bedside lamp before turning back to him. "I can't let you give me a wake up like that and not return the favour."

He brushed a few loose strands away from her face and looked over at her bedside clock. "Do we have time?" he asked.

She glanced over her shoulder at the time and said, "Depends. How quick can you be?"

"Not sure of the best way to answer that," he snorted.

"Then don't answer," she said as she leant in towards him, her lips parted. As their lips met, he grasped hold of her and rolled on to his back, bringing her with him. His breath caught in his throat as he felt her hand reach down between the two of them and slide under the waistband of his boxers. Her fingers curled around his erection, stroking up and over his length, her thumb smoothing the moisture it found over the head before she withdrew her hand, resting it on his chest as she kissed his forehead.

"Katniss," he moaned softly in to her neck, running his fingers along her spine. "Don't tease me."

Her smile widened as she encouraged him to lift his hips and helped him out of his boxers. "You know," she said, her eyes darkening with lust as she took in the sight of him, "I've wanted to make you come with my mouth again since the first night we slept together. Sit up for me."

Butterflies fluttered in his stomach as he did as she asked. He watched Katniss lower her mouth towards him, then wound his hands into her hair as she wrapped her lips around his cock. "Oh, fuck, Katniss…" he hissed as her tongue ran around the ridge of his head, the searing heat of her kisses draining all rational thought from him. Without relinquishing his grip on her, he tried to sit up straighter so he could watch as she took him deeper and deeper, her hollowed cheeks sucking him harder than he ever thought possible.

If she wanted him to come quickly she was going the right way about it; there was no way he was going to last long with such a sensual assault on him. Part of him wanted to push her away, to make her stop so that he might prolong his pleasure; he was torn between the want of it lasting longer and the need to climax. Need won out over want and he held her steady as her fingers curled around the base of his cock, and she began to slowly stroke what she couldn't take in her mouth. "Oh, Katniss…" he choked out, shuddering as the pressure inside him suddenly reached its peak, radiating outwards in hot waves. He hadn't had time to warn Katniss before his orgasm was torn from his body and she pulled away suddenly, gagging slightly as his semen hit the back of her throat. "Oh, fuck, I'm so sorry," he gasped, breathless and embarrassed.

"It's ok," she spluttered, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand. "Seriously," she said, taking in the look of worry on his face. "I'll take it as a compliment."

"It was pretty fucking spectacular," he said, collapsing back against the pillow.

"Don't get too comfortable," she warned him. "All this early morning sex was for a reason, remember?"

"I know," he sighed. "I just wish we didn't have to rush off anywhere. And I really am sorry. Please don't take it as a sign of things to come."

"I won't," she responded, a twinkle in her eye. "And I guess it helped with the wake-up too. There's no way I'll fall asleep again now."

With a swift kiss to his lips she clambered out of bed and threw on some clothes, Peeta watching her, still in disbelief at his change in fortune. He wasn't sure if he would ever get used to feeling as happy as he did with her, but, he reasoned, that was something he would have to learn to live with.


	2. Autumn's Best of Cheer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge thanks to Court81981 for being the greatest Beta in the world, and for inspiration and encouragement (and putting up with my drunken ramblings.) Thank you so much, Court!

## September

Getting Peeta out of the house was a rare occurrence. After his mishap with allowing a volunteer into his home to help run the sanctuary, he had become even more wary of trying again, which meant their days out together could only be timed in accordance with when Finnick was free and willing to lend a hand.

Just such an opportunity came up in the last week of September. After a wet and washed-out August, England had been promised an Indian summer and Katniss was overjoyed to see the sunshine return. Peeta had long wanted to take Katniss for a day out in the countryside and so when they woke on the morning of their planned excursion to see the sun shining down on them he practically skipped around his kitchen as he prepared them a picnic for the day. His infectious enthusiasm quickly spread to her despite the early start, and she pottered around the kitchen, getting in the way as she tried to 'help' by slicing bread to make sandwiches. Mostly, however, she ended up getting under his feet until he sat her down at the kitchen table with a mug of hazelnut coffee to keep her occupied.

As Peeta finished packing more food than the two of them would comfortably manage into a wicker basket, Finnick could be heard heading downstairs towards the kitchen, whistling a jaunty tune. "Morning," he said, bursting in to the kitchen. "So, where are you heading?" he asked as he opened the basket to examine the contents, picking a few grapes from a bunch resting on top.

"I thought we'd go up to Southwold. Not been up that way for ages, so…"

"Nice," he responded, popping the purloined grapes into his mouth. "You know," he said, swallowing the fruit, "if you actually tried again, got someone in to help you out instead of relying on me each time, you'd be able to do things like this more often."

"And we both know what happened last time," Peeta answered, dismissing the suggestion immediately.

"Then you'll remember that last time I told you to try again that I also told you not to be a dickhead and actually check them out before you leave them alone in your home."

"Finn, I'd rather just do it all myself. It's not worth the hassle and worry."

"For you, maybe. And you don't do it all yourself, which is why we're having this conversation. I'd quite like my days off to be days off sometimes. You know I can't keep this up forever."

"I'll help," Katniss piped up, causing the two men to look over at her. "I mean, I'll help you find someone. I've got a pretty good judge of character. Better than you, at least, no offence. But either way Finn's right, Peeta. We can't keep relying on him, it isn't fair."

"You'll help me find someone?" he repeated.

"Absolutely."

She could see him contemplating the idea as he made Finnick a tea. "Ok," he said at last as he stirred the sugar in to the brew. "Fine. I'll put another ad out. And I'll make sure you're here when I meet them. Ok?"

"Ok," she replied. "But don't worry about it for now, at least today we've got Finn as our personal slave. I get the impression that deep down he actually likes being bossed around."

"Maybe by you, Katniss," said Finnick as he dipped his finger in to a little spilt sugar on the kitchen work surface. He leant over towards her and suggestively sucked the sugar off the end of his finger. "You can boss me around any time and any way you want."

"Finnick!" she gasped, scandalised. "What would Annie say if she heard you talking like that?"

"She'd roll her eyes and tell him to behave," interjected Peeta. "I'm gonna tell him to behave or he'll get a swift kick to the nads."

"And what's your missus going to get? She started it."

He answered, not with words, by crossing over to where she was sat and lowering his lips to hers. In response she reached up and buried her fingers in his hair, massaging the back of his scalp as she opened her mouth to him. Katniss was only half aware of Finnick's words drifting through to them. "I think I prefer her treatment."

Both she and Peeta did a good job of ignoring his comment; as Peeta reached out to gently cup, the side of her face she continued to hold him steady, greedily devouring each one of his kisses.

When he finally pulled away from her, he turned to Finnick and said, "What were you saying?"

"Just wondering where my good morning kisses are."

"Annie couldn't make it today, then?" Katniss asked.

"Nah, she's working. I get to experience a day in the life of the sad and lonely existence of Peeta Mellark in all its glory."

"Fuck you," Peeta retorted.

Katniss was pretty sure that Finnick was the only person who could get away with saying something like that. It was a sore point with him, she'd found, that he spent so many of his days alone. It pained her to think of him pottering around the cottage without seeing anyone, the sole human contact and highlight of his day being speaking with her over Skype.

"Anyway, you nearly ready to go?" asked Finnick.

"I think so," replied Peeta. "Belle's coming with us, by the way. If that's ok with you?" he said, turning to Katniss.

"Sure," Katniss replied, although if she was entirely honest she had hoped to have Peeta all to herself, and not have to worry about looking after any animals for a day.

"Well, if that's the case, shall we?" he asked, holding his hand out towards her. She took it and allowed him to help her to her feet.

"When can I expect you back?" Finnick asked, helping himself to extra sugar in his tea.

"Dunno. Early evening? I'll keep you updated."

"What I'm trying to say, Peet, is are you cooking me dinner tonight or am I going to have to fend for myself?"

He shook his head a little in disbelief. "How I let you get away with talking to me this way I'll never know."

"Because you love me and want me. So, are you cooking me dinner?"

"Fine."

"Atta boy," Finnick said with a grin, ruffling Peeta's hair.

Shrugging away the attention, Peeta said, "See you later, ok? Call me if you need anything."

"Get the hell out of here, and quit worrying. Have a good day, the pair of you," he grinned.

Peeta picked up the wicker basket containing their picnic and Katniss followed him towards the front door. Before heading outside Peeta whistled loudly and Belle came bounding towards them. "You wanna go for a drive, girl?" he said with enthusiasm, scratching her behind the ears and increasing his dog's excitement tenfold.

"So, where exactly are we going?" Katniss asked as he opened the hatchback on his Peugeot, allowing Belle to jump inside. Once she was lying down he leant over the back seat and placed the wicker picnic basket inside, then closed the hatchback door.

"I thought we could head up to the coast. It's been far too long since I've seen the sea."

"Oh?" she asked, trying to remember the last time she'd been to the coast herself.

"Yeah, I grew up in Battle, and obviously spent a lot of time in Hastings. Whenever I see the sea it reminds me of home." Katniss took in the wistful look on his face and entwined his fingers with her own.

"Do you ever go back there?"

"No," he replied, his eyes firmly set on the ground. "I've got no reason to. There's nothing there for me now."

She felt a twinge of pity for him. He had mentioned his estranged mother and brothers in passing but always seemed to change the subject very quickly. His father, it seemed, he could talk about for hours, regaling her with amusing anecdotes until his eyes would darken at some painful untold memory and she would have to change the subject herself to bring him back. It was apparent to her that he was remembering whatever he had lost from his past life. She felt a momentary pang of guilt as she thought of her own family home. It was so rare that she got to see her mother. But then, on those rare occasions that she did venture back to Gloucestershire her mother was so barely aware of her presence anyway that she almost couldn't see the point. After her husband's death, Maria Everdeen had withdrawn so far in to herself that she had become unrecognisable even to her own daughters. Katniss' anger at her for effectively abandoning her two daughters dissipated over time but not before Maria was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's. Back when she still had her full cognitive faculties, she would have loved Peeta, but now Katniss wondered if the two of them would ever meet. Prim made the occasional visit over to her nursing home in Gloucestershire whenever she got the chance, but Katniss hated visiting her. The smell of death hung in the air, the reminder of her own mortality, and she despised it.

Shaking away the negative thoughts, she raised Peeta's fingers to her mouth and kissed the tips. He returned the favour, pressing her fingers to his lips and holding them there before flashing her a winning smile. "Shall we?" he asked, opening the passenger side door for her. The chivalrous display was typical of him, and while it would normally annoy her feminist side to be treated in such a way, she found it impossible to supress her grin as she got into his car. He waited patiently by the door until she was seated and comfortable before closing it for her.

After settling himself in the driver's seat and starting up the engine Katniss asked, "So how long 'til we get there?"

"Maybe an hour and a half. An hour, if the roads are clear."

"An hour? I didn't think we were that far from the coast!"

"We're not, if you want to go to a beach that's full of arcade machines and covered in turds and used condoms. If that takes your fancy I can get us there in about fifteen minutes. If you want to go to a Blue Flag award-winning beach it'll take a bit longer. But it's your choice."

"Hmmm, tough decision," she said. "Maybe we'll save the turds for another day."

"You're sure?"

"I'm sure," she said with a grin.

"Ok. Turdless paradise it is, then."

He turned on the car stereo before pulling out of his driveway, trying to sing along with the Fratellis track currently playing. Katniss supressed a wince at his absolute lack of musical ability; instead she was touched that he felt comfortable enough around her to sing even though he knew that he had no discernible talent.

The roads were all pretty clear, and Peeta got them to their destination in a little over an hour. Driving in to Southwold was like stepping back in time. As they drove through the town, Katniss didn't spot a single chain shop. Every shop was independent, with quaint little cafes interspersed between, and hanging baskets filled with colourful pansies, petunias and geraniums were visible on every single wall.

Peeta parked the car near a looming white lighthouse and Katniss felt a little rush of excitement at seeing the sea. A few fluffy white clouds were rolling in from the grey North Sea and despite how cold and uninviting the water looked, Katniss could still spot several swimmers and surfers braving the waters. She watched as one wetsuit-clad surfer took a tumble into the sea while Peeta opened the hatchback, attaching a lead to Belle's collar. He seemed to be hesitating over the picnic. "What's up?" she asked him.

"Do you want to eat now or later? I don't want to have to haul this around all day…"

"Leave it there. We'll come back for it later."

Their hands interlinked, they strolled towards the beach, Belle trotting along by Peeta's side. The beach's promenade was like something out of a fairy tale; as far as the eye could see, brightly coloured little beach huts lined the walk. "This is the solution," Katniss said, eyeing the beach huts. "We get one of these. We could leave the picnic there instead of having to go back to the car."

"Perfect," replied Peeta. "If you've got a spare seventy grand to spend."

"Seventy grand?" she cried, utterly incredulous.

"Yup. They're mostly owned by London highflyers or rich American tourists. And as a London-based journalist, I think that puts you firmly in the first category. So go on, this could be our first property we own together. I reckon I can just about scrape a spare five hundred to put towards it if you don't mind contributing the rest. We just need to pick one."

"I think I'm getting the raw end of this deal, Peeta."

"Not at all. As majority shareholder you'd get to pick the colour. And that's a big responsibility."

"Oh, well in that case, fine. I'm sold. You can help me pick one, but I get the final say, ok?"

"Sounds fair. What about this one?" he asked pointing to the nearest, which had been painted a pastel yellow colour.

"Oh, god, no. Sky blue neighbours? I don't think so."

"Racist."

"Well, on your head be it when the neighbourhood goes downhill."

"What if I intend on bringing it down myself?"

She couldn't keep up the pretence of it being a serious conversation for long and was soon falling in to him with a fit of giggles. His strong arm snaked its way around her waist, holding her close to him and she soaked up his steady warmth as a cool breeze came off the sea, ruffling their hair in the wind. Katniss looked over at the lapping waves, overcome with the desire to be closer to them. "Can we head down on to the beach?" she asked.

"Sure," he replied, leading the way. "Belle's probably itching to go for a proper run too." As he let Belle off the lead, she watched his profile. He took so much joy in watching his dog run up and down the beach, splashing into the sea and back again and as Katniss saw the love in his eyes she felt a huge rush of affection for him. They slowly ambled along the half-sandy, half-pebbled beach in silence, holding one another's hand when Peeta suddenly broke away from her. He bent down and picked up a small orange pebble and examined it closely before dropping it again and making a small huff of disappointment.

"You ok?"

"Yup," he said, not elaborating further on his odd behaviour.

"Are you going to tell me what that was all about?"

"Nope. Not yet, anyway. Maybe later." He turned to face her and his eyes roamed over every inch of her face. Katniss could feel herself growing red under his intense gaze. "You look so beautiful right now," he told her.

"Stop it, Peeta," she said, flushing even further.

"Why? I'm not allowed to tell my girlfriend she's beautiful?"

His openness and honesty about his feelings towards her still had the power to make her feel uncomfortable. 'Beautiful' was never a word she would have used to describe herself, and she had never been good at accepting compliments, always feeling suspicious of one who paid them to her. Hearing that word come from Peeta, knowing there was no ulterior motive to it, still felt strange and foreign to her. "I'm not," she said simply.

"You are," he said, pulling her into his embrace. "And you better get used to hearing it." The fresh sea breeze whipped around them as Peeta buried his face in her hair. She could feel him planting soft kisses on the top of her head and melted further into him. After a moment his kisses became firmer and faster and he groaned slightly into her. "Getting hungry," he said between kisses. "I might have to eat you."

"Doesn't that go against the fundamental tenets of veganism?" she asked with a chuckle.

"Don't care," he responded, tilting her chin back slightly and capturing her lips in a desperate kiss.

"You want to head back to the car and get the picnic?" she asked, pulling away from him for a moment.

"I want you," he replied, leaning back in towards her. "Do you remember you telling me you wanted to have sex on a beach?" he whispered in her ear.

"Peeta!" she gasped as his hand slipped lower over her the curve of her backside and squeezed. A rush of heat between her legs betrayed her feelings. She wanted him, dammit, she wanted him so much it hurt, but they were in public in the middle of the day. There was no way he could be serious… "Peeta, we can't…."

"I know," he replied. "Just wanted to give you a little something to think about."

"Don't," she laughed. "I'll be going crazy all day."

"Welcome to my world."

"Come on," she said, trying to disentangle herself from his embrace but failing miserably. "You want that picnic you're going to have to let me go."

"Just….can you give me a minute?" he asked her. In explanation he pushed his hips forward and she could feel his cock, thick and hard, pressing through their clothes into her.

"You maybe want to sit down for a minute?"

"Probably wise. There are a lot of old women around here. I don't want to upset them."

They sank down on to a patch of sand that was surrounded by more pebbles and Peeta reached towards them, taking a handful. He went through them one at a time, dismissing some instantly, looking at others more closely before also dropping them.

"Are you going to tell me what you're doing?"

With a shy smile he shook his head, looking up at her momentarily before picking up another handful. Once again, some of them he dropped straight away, some he examined a little longer before dropping them with a look of disappointment. He continued the strange behaviour with two more handfuls of pebbles before Katniss began to grow impatient.

"So, is it safe for us to move yet?"

"It is," he said, wiping his hands on the front of his jeans before standing up and helping Katniss to her feet. "You want that picnic yet?"

"Sure."

Peeta gave a clear, loud whistle and Belle came bounding back. She jumped up at him, her paws soaking wet, leaving slightly muddy prints over his shirt. "You having fun, girl?" She gave a loud, excited bark in response, rolled over on to her back and looked up expectantly, refusing to move at all until both Peeta and Katniss had given her several belly rubs. After reattaching her lead, the three of them wandered back to the car and retrieved the wicker picnic basket. Within another fifteen minutes, they had returned to the beach and spread a soft blanket over the sand while Peeta unpacked the food.

"I swear that you're trying to make me fat, Peeta," Katniss said as she looked at everything he had made: three varieties of sandwiches, some with cashew cheese and onion chutney, some with avocado and salsa, some with homemade chickpea burgers and salad, a Waldorf salad made with homemade egg-free mayonnaise, fragrant Moroccan couscous, wild rice with roasted garlic and aubergine… And of course his usual beautifully decorated cupcakes. Today he had made maple and pecan with salted caramel frosting. To drink he had brought a bottle of sparkling elderflower juice, and he poured them both a glass, handing one to Katniss before clinking his own glass against hers. They ate until they were fit to burst and shared most of what was left with Belle, who ate just as ravenously and enthusiastically as her master.

She couldn't possibly feel more content. The sun was warm but not blazing, and the surfeit of food was making her slightly sleepy. She leant back on her elbows, facing towards the sea and allowed herself to deeply breathe in the clean air. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Peeta looking through more pebbles, and she tried to quell the annoyance that he wouldn't tell her what he was doing.

With most of the food gone, and with Peeta lost in his own world, Katniss started to get restless again. Although she tried to keep her impatience hidden, Peeta soon picked up on it. "Did you want to go?" he asked her.

"Whenever you're ready," she replied.

He looked through the last of the pebbles in his hand, and dropping them all back on the beach with a heartfelt sigh, he said, "Let's go, then." It was only the work of a few moments to place the empty plates and blanket back inside the wicker basket, and after signalling to Belle that it was time for them to leave, they slowly began to make their way off the beach.

Suddenly he stopped in his tracks and bent down yet again, picking up another small, orange pebble by his feet. As he turned it slowly over in his hand a smile crept across his face. He polished it on the sleeve of his shirt and held it up to the light before holding it out to Katniss. "Here," he said. "I've been hoping to find some all day. It's amber."

Katniss took the tiny stone from him. Not much bigger than a pearl, the amber was roughly cuboid in shape with weather-smoothed edges that made it almost spherical. Her breath was taken away by the gesture. "You've been looking for amber all day?" she said quietly.

"Uh-huh. I wasn't sure I'd find any, but-"

"How did you… I don't understand…"

A small chuckle escaped his lips. "This beach is pretty renowned for having amber wash up on shore. We'll go for a walk in town in a bit if you like and you'll see all the shops are full of it. Amber jewellery, amber statuettes and ornaments…. but I wanted to find you a piece that was pure. Unadulterated."

The pricking feeling at the back of her eyes gave her just a moment's warning before her vision was obscured by tears. How she had been annoyed at him for trying to find her something so perfect she didn't know. "Peeta, this might be the sweetest gift anyone has ever given me." She was captivated by the smooth amber in her hand, by the gentle warmth it seemed to exude, how it seemed to create its own luminescence….

"You're welcome," he grinned.

"Seriously, this is just wonderful." The words sounded almost hollow but she meant them deeply. "Honestly Peeta, I don't think I could ever repay you for something so thoughtful."

A sly grin spread across his face as he put his arm across her shoulders and pulled her closer to him. "Leave it with me. I'm sure I'll think of a way."


	3. Beguile Us in the Way You Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge thanks to everyone who has left kudos or commented. 
> 
> Also, if you happen to be on tumblr, pop by and say hello there! I’m alatarielgildaen dot tumblr dot com
> 
> And huge, sterling thanks to Court81981 for being an awesome Beta and tremendous person :)

## October

Peeta was immensely proud to be walking hand in hand with such a gorgeous creature. Dressed in a loose-fitting Jim Morrison t-shirt, jeans shorts, tights, Doc Marten style boots and an oversized pleather jacket she’d borrowed from him, and with a guitar slung across her back, she was every inch his dream woman. He glanced across at her. Her face was set in a hard look of determination, but there was a definite underlying nervousness.

“How are you doing?” he asked her.

“Fine,” she answered, sounding thoroughly unconvinced.

“You’ll be amazing, seriously.”

She smiled tightly and looked down at the floor while Peeta squeezed her hand to reassure her. Finnick had mentioned how she ought to sing a song or two at an open mic night he often attended. At first she had shot the idea down, but Peeta had been very persuasive. Eventually she had given in to his persistent requests, but he could see how nervous she was. She had absolutely no idea how talented she was, and he found that humbleness so appealing.

When they finally reached the pub, Katniss tensed slightly next to him as they looked in through the window. It was already starting to get busy and it was only half past seven.

“I’m not sure if I can do this,” she said, turning to him.

He placed his lips against her forehead and enveloped her in his arms. “No one’s going to make you,” he answered. “But they’ll love you if you do it, I promise. You’re so good, Katniss.”

She nodded and took a deep breath. “Let’s just see what happens, then, ok?”

“Sure,” he replied, opening the pub door for her and standing back to allow her to go first. “But fair warning; you know how persuasive I can be.”

Peeta got the first round of drinks in at the bar while he pointed out to Katniss the last available table, signalling for Finn and Annie to go and join her when they finally entered the pub a couple of minutes later. Peeta carefully picked up the three pints as well as Annie’s vodka tonic, manoeuvring his way through the growing crowd before setting the drinks down on the table and settling himself down next to Katniss. “Cheers,” he said, raising his glass slightly before taking a hefty swig.

It wasn’t long before the night began to get fully underway. The first act was pretty terrible: two girls with ukuleles who could neither play particularly well nor hold a tune to save their lives.

“At least I won’t be the worst one here,” Katniss said in a low voice, cringing as one of the girls failed to hit an especially high note.

“You never would have been anyway,” Peeta reassured her. “Finn’s playing, don’t forget.”

“Oi, you watch it, mate,” replied Finnick. “Else I’ll force you up on that stage with me.”

The next act was equally awful: a male/female duet who had gotten far too drunk before getting up on stage. Peeta thought they probably would have been good if they hadn’t overindulged; they could clearly sing, but neither of them could remember what they were playing and they mostly fell about on stage laughing until they apologised and gave it up.

Peeta could see that the next act did little to settle Katniss’ rising nerves. The solo girl played fiddle as she belted out old English folk songs. Her voice had power and soul and the longer she sang, the more Peeta noticed a nervous twitch in Katniss’ leg. He placed his hand over her thigh and gently squeezed her to reassure her. “Stop it. She’s good, but you’re better,” he said to her, nuzzling into her neck and placing a series of kisses just behind her ear. 

She playfully pushed him away and focused her attention on her pint. “You’re just saying that because you feel obligated.”

“No, I’m seri—” That was when he noticed her, taking him so much by surprise that he was unable to finish his sentence. Crossing in front of his line of vision, heading towards a small table near the stage. Jenn. He hadn’t seen her since the morning of his accident, having left her to look after their animals while he went sabbing. He marvelled at that for a moment; Ipswich wasn’t a large place and to have managed to avoid someone for nearly three years…. 

“Ow,” Katniss hissed. Peeta withdrew his hand immediately; in his shock he had gripped tighter than ever on to her leg. “Sorry,” he apologised. “I’m so sorry.”

“What is it?” she asked.

“Nothing,” he lied, unsure if he should mention her name. Instead he reached for his pint with a shaking hand, cursing himself for allowing her appearance to rattle him so much. And cursing her for doing this to him in the first place.

Finnick noticed Peeta’s behaviour; how grey and ashen he had become, how quiet and withdrawn. “What’s up, mate?” 

Annie noticed her first. She nudged Finnick and nodded in the direction of where Jenn was sat. He visibly tensed then turned back to Peeta. “Do you want to leave?”

He shook his head. No. He didn’t want to leave. He wanted to be able to go out for a pint with his girlfriend and not have an anxiety attack just because his ex was in the vicinity. 

“What is it?” Katniss repeated, more urgently.

“My ex is here,” he said, the strain apparent in his voice.

“The one who…?” There was no need for her to finish her question. Peeta nodded and downed most of his remaining pint. “Fuck her,” she said venomously.

“I’m sorry?” he said, startled by Katniss’ language. She swore so rarely that hearing swear words come from her, particularly said with such aggression, came as something of a shock.

“Fuck her,” she said, shrugging. “Don’t let her get to you. You’ve done nothing wrong, and her loss is my gain. Fuck her.” She also knocked back the majority of her pint. “Who wants another?” she asked the group. Everyone nodded and Katniss stalked off towards the bar.

“She’s right, mate. This was bound to happen sooner or later. I’m surprised it hasn’t already. Don’t let it ruin your night. And don’t forget what you’ve got now. The last thing Katniss wants to see is you moping around because your ex is in the room.” 

“I’m not moping,” he protested fiercely.

“Doesn’t look that way, mate.”

Katniss returned a few minutes later carrying their drinks on a tray. Peeta was ashamed to notice that she seemed to be in a foul mood now. Slamming his drink down in front of him and spilling it a little, she grabbed the tray to return it to the bar. On her return she grabbed hold of the guitar that she had left propped up in the corner. “I’m going to see if I can go next.”

She left the three of the alone and marched towards the compere. “I think I know someone who won’t be getting laid tonight,” Finnick said.

“Finn, stop,” Annie admonished. “And Peeta, I know it must be a shock. But think how this feels to Katniss. You look like you’re pining over her.”

“I’m not pining!” he objected.

“But that’s what it looks like. What it probably feels like to her.”

He felt the bottom of his stomach drop out. Before she got up on stage he had to talk to her; there was no way he could allow her up there if that’s what she was thinking. He pushed forward through the gathered crowd until he reached her. “Katniss?” he called to her as he got a little closer and she turned around to face him. “I’m sorry. Don’t think badly of me, please.”

“I don’t.”

“It was just a shock. That’s all.”

“I know, Peeta. It’s not you I’m not angry at, ok?”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m sure,” she replied, cupping the side of his face before placing a soft kiss on his lips.

The relief he felt at her words was clearly palpable, as half the tension in his body left him. “Good luck. You’ll be amazing, I know you will.”

She smiled a little, a rosy glow creeping over her cheeks. “Peeta, it’s just a small pub gig. It’s hardly the Albert Hall.”

“Gotta start somewhere though, right?” he grinned at her as the compere announced that she was up next. Peeta mouthed ‘ _Good luck_ ’ at her again before returning to sit with Finnick and Annie.

He picked up his pint, eagerly watching the stage as Katniss came and sat on a stool in front of the microphone. Discomfort from the attention was emanating from her in waves but Peeta willed her to keep going.

“Hi,” she said, not really looking into the audience. “Ummm, I was going to do _Chasing Cars_ by Snow Patrol, but I’ve changed my mind.” Some heckler in the audience shouted out, “Thank god!” and Peeta tried to find the culprit, immediately flashing the suspect a glare. Katniss swallowed and when she looked up the look on her face was more determined than ever. “This one goes out to anyone who has ever been burned by love.”

The first time he heard her sing the he felt as though the world could have ended without him noticing. And that still hadn’t changed. The notes that came from her were strong and clear, and he couldn’t tear his eyes away as he allowed the song to wash over him.

_“I would have given you all of my heart_  
But there's someone who's torn it apart  
And he's taken just all that I had  
But if you want I'll try to love again  
Baby I'll try to love again but I know….” 

He barely heard the rest of the lyrics, so mesmerised was he by her presence and vocal prowess, but it was clear that she was singing directly to him. Yes, he’d been cut deeply, he’d been burned badly by love, but with her help he could recover and love again…

As the final chord on her guitar slowly died away Peeta remembered to breathe. He was on his feet, clapping and cheering with the rest of the assembled audience, but while the rest of the audience was blown away by her sheer talent he was also taken aback by her song choice, knowing how apt those particular words were in his life. He risked a glance over to where Jenn was sat. She was clapping along with everyone else, still entirely unaware that he was in the room. He looked back to Katniss on stage and as their eyes met across the room she flashed him a small half smile. “ _Thank you_ ,” he mouthed back at her.

Several people were calling for an encore. Katniss looked at the compere and her question to him, “Have I got time for another?” resonated out across the microphone. When the compere nodded another loud cheer went up from the crowd.

“Ok,” she said. “Well, I guess I have my father to thank for my musical interests. He was a mod in the sixties, and growing up at home if you didn’t at least appreciate the mod scene you’d go mad. I’m going to do a song called _Afterglow_ by Small Faces. This has always been a favourite song of mine, and I want to dedicate this to a really special guy.” Peeta suddenly felt as if the room were empty apart from the two of them. His heart skipped several beats as his feet carried him closer to the stage. “Peeta Mellark. This is for you.”

At the mention of his name he became aware of Jenn spinning in her seat and looking around the room. Her mouth fell open at the sight of him and he forced himself to keep looking at the stage. Katniss was giving him the opportunity to show Jenn that he was fine, that he was strong without her, and he was going to grasp that opportunity with both hands. She began to sing, and her eyes were on him; no one else in the world mattered except the two of them. 

_“Love, love is all around me, everywhere,_  
Love has come to touch my soul  
With someone who really cares.  
No one can deny us,  
People who once passed me by  
Will turn their heads round. 

_“I'm happy just to be with you_  
And loving you the way I do,  
There’s everything I need to know  
Just resting in the afterglow of your love. 

_“You, yes you have always been here,_  
Feeling deep inside.  
A feeling that I could not see  
Or touch, or try to hide.  
My love is in and around you,  
I bless the day that I found you,  
So listen up baby. 

_“I'm happy just to be with you_  
And loving you the way I do, yeah,  
There's everything I need to know  
Just resting in the afterglow of your love.” 

The room broke out in tumultuous applause as soon as she finished the song. Peeta leapt up on stage, picked her up in his arms and swung her around, pressing his lips in to hers over and over and over again. “That was wonderful,” he whispered to her, and not caring that the whole room was watching them he kissed her again, weaving his hands in to her hair to hold her steady.

“Thanks,” she grinned when they finally broke apart, her forehead resting against his. She grasped his hand in hers and together the two of them climbed down from the stage.   
Finn was up next, and as he took his place on the stool he said into the microphone, “Before I start I just need to check, Peeta, if I dedicate a song to you will I get the same treatment?” The crowd laughed appreciatively as he began to play, wowing them with an acoustic rendition of Jeff Buckley’s _Lilac Wine._

The room was becoming hot and stuffy, and after Finnick had finished playing, Katniss asked if the two of them could head outside to get a little fresh air. On their way out, Peeta heard his name being called. He spun on the spot and was face to face with Jenn. “Do you want another drink?” Katniss asked him, her hand resting on his lower back.

“Please,” he responded, realising how dry his mouth had become.

“I’ll, um, I’ll see you in a minute, ok?” said Katniss, briefly kissing him before walking away.

Face to face with the woman who trampled on his heart, Peeta found that he simply had nothing to say to her. His mind was completely blank. “Hello, Jenny,” he said at last.

She seemed similarly unsure of what to say. “It’s um, it’s good to see you.”

“Ok.”

She looked over Peeta’s shoulder in the direction Katniss had walked. “She seems nice.”

“Yeah. She is.”

An awkward pause before she asked, “Have you been seeing her long?”

“It’s been a couple of months.”

Jenn nodded and looked away for a moment. “Well. I’m glad you’re happy.”

Peeta felt like he’d been punched in the stomach. To say ‘I’m glad you’re happy’ after what she had done to him….? He swallowed the feeling away. Katniss had given him this opportunity to show her how well he was doing without her. He didn’t want to ruin it. “And you? Are you seeing anyone?”

“Yeah….” She looked over her shoulder and Peeta caught the eye of a tall, handsome, but rather arrogant looking blond guy looking over at them. “We’ve been seeing each other about three-and-a-half years now.”

Three-and-a-half years…. Peeta stared at her, that feeling of being punched in the gut returning ten times as strong, as a massive piece of the puzzle fell in to place. Three-and-half-years ago they’d been engaged. Three-and-a-half years ago they’d still been living together. And it was a little over three-and-a-half years ago that cracks had started to appear in their relationship. She had been having an affair for the last nine months of their relationship. He could have kicked himself for not spotting it sooner; she had become more and more distant, she had spurned his advances repeatedly…. But the idea of cheating on her was such an alien concept to him that he hadn’t even contemplated that she could do it to him. 

Nine months of their relationship was a lie…. But they had only gotten engaged two months prior to that...

Swallowing the bile that had risen to the surface, he said in a voice of forced calm, “So, where did you meet?”

“At the gym,” she replied. “We got talking after one of my yoga classes.”

“I see. Well, thanks for telling me, Jenn. Thanks for being so fucking straight up with me, that for two-and-a-half years I was tearing my hair out thinking no one would ever want to be with a deformed freak. Thanks for giving me absolutely no fucking clue about the truth, and leading me to think that this—” he pointed at his lower left leg, “—was the sole reason you walked out on me. Fuck. An affair I could have dealt with. What you did, how you ended it, was un-fucking-forgiveable.”

“Peeta—”

“Would you have ended it with me if I hadn’t been unconscious? Or would you have just kept stringing me along, maybe waited until we were actually married?”

“I wouldn’t expect you to understand. I’d just…. I’d fallen out of love with you, Peeta. I’d wanted a way out for a long time.”

“When? At what point did you decide you no longer loved me, but that you didn’t respect me enough to end it?”

“It wasn’t like that, Peeta. At first I wanted to love you. When Cato and I met, I still wanted to be in love with you. When you proposed I thought it would make me fall in love with you again.”

“Wait, you were feeing this _before_ we got engaged? What kind of twisted fucking logic is that, Jenny?”

“Peeta, don’t make a scene.”

“Sorry, what?” he said, as all the anger and hurt he had felt after her total rejection of him bubbled up to the surface. “Don’t make a scene? How did you expect me to react?”  
“Well, you’ve obviously moved on. I just thought we should wipe the slate.”

“Are you for real? Moved on? Yeah, I’ve moved on. Took me fucking long enough but I finally managed to pick myself up out of the shattered mess you left me in and yes. I’m happy now. No fucking thanks to you.”

Jenn’s boyfriend, Cato, stood up and came over to her side. He loomed over Peeta, trying to look intimidating, but Peeta was too angry to be bothered by empty threats. “Is there a problem, babe?”

“No,” said Peeta before Jenn could speak. “No, there’s no problem. And you know what? I take it back. I want to thank you for what you did. Thank you for ripping my heart out, chewing it up and spitting it back out. Thank you for every fucking sleepless night, thank you for the anxiety and the panic attacks, for the uncertainty, for the insecurities you left me with, for the fear, thank you for every single fucking suicidal thought, and thank you for all the pain and misery you heaped on me. Because you know what? If I hadn’t had that, maybe, just maybe I would have found someone else before Katniss. And if I had, I wouldn’t be as happy as I am now. So thank you for the hell you put me through, because it was worth it in the end.”

Without another word to her he turned away and practically bumped into Katniss. He was shaking with fury, but as soon as he saw Katniss he immediately began to calm down. “You did brilliantly,” she whispered to him as she threw her arms around his neck.

“Thank you,” he whispered back, struggling to keep his voice steady. 

She released her hold on him just long enough to hand him a new pint, which we accepted gratefully, taking several large swigs to steady his nerves. “Can we go outside?” he asked her when he felt he was able to use his voice again.

“Of course,” she said, leading the way through the crowded room and out to the beer garden. There were a couple of bench seats free and Katniss made a beeline straight towards them. “You know, I’m so proud of you,” she said, turning towards him and twisting one of his curls around her finger.

“Thanks.”

“Seriously, Peeta. You did really well back there. How are you feeling?”

He pushed his hair back off his face with shaking hands. “Shocked,” he responded, his breath ragged. “Still shaking now,” he said, holding his hand up and trying to hold it steady. “Look.”

She took hold of his trembling hand and rested it on her leg, slowly circling the back of it with her thumb until his breathing started to return to normal. “I’ll say it again, Peeta. I really am proud of you.”

“Cheers. I’m proud of you. You were fantastic. I told you that you had nothing to worry about.”

“You did. I need to listen to you more.”

“Yeah, you do.”

She placed her drink on the floor by her feet and took Peeta’s pint from him in order to do the same before leaning in close to him once again. “Peeta,” she breathed in his ear, and nervousness tinted the edge of her voice. “I need to tell you something.… I…. I love you.”

His heart stopped for a moment before leaping into his throat and pounding with a frantic rhythm. Hearing her sing those words in someone else’s lyrics was one thing. Hearing her say it to him, for the first time, was something else entirely. He could see his shocked reflection in her shining grey eyes. For quite some time now he had known that he was in love with her. The intense emotions he’d had for her when they first met had grown and developed into something very real and deep and he had wanted to tell those words her every single day since he realised that it was indeed love he was feeling. But he had wanted her to say it first. It was so important to him that she say it first, just in case it was too soon, in case she felt rushed. Or worse, in case she felt pressured to say it back without meaning it. Slowly his brain caught up with his racing heart and he pulled her into his tight embrace. “I love you, too,” he said, peppering her face with kisses. “I love you so much.”

“I know you do,” she grinned. 

Nothing seemed real in that moment; it was as if he were wandering through some wonderful dream. The background noise from the pub seemed to diminish and all that existed in that moment was the two of them. What he’d said to Jenn came back to him and rang truer than ever. He was right; all the hurt and misery he had suffered through was worth it in the end because it had led him to this moment in time, and that was something he wouldn’t change for anything. A feeling of giddy light-headedness overtook him, and he was entirely unable to prevent the laughter that fell from him.

“What’s so funny?” she asked him.

“Nothing,“ he said, trying to regain control of his breathing. “I’m just unbelievably happy, that’s all.”

He reached for her hand and held it against his lips. “Do you want to get out of here?” she asked him as he repeatedly kissed her digits over and over again.

“More than anything,” he replied. He downed the remainder of his pint, the sudden influx of alcohol making him feel even more giddy, before staggering to his feet and helping Katniss up too. “Get your guitar and we’ll go.”

She flashed him a perfect smile before turning on her heels and practically skipping away from him. Looking around the beer garden Peeta caught sight of Finnick and Annie and made his way through the crowd towards them. “We’re off,” he said as soon as he reached them.

“Well, don’t you look like the cat that got the cream?” said Finnick, raising his eyebrow at his best mate. “You ok?”

“More than ok,” grinned Peeta. 

“Jenn?”

“Can fuck right off.”

“Good lad. Been saying the same for years, so I’m glad you finally caught up.”

“I know, I know.” He looked over his shoulder where he could see Katniss waiting for him. “I have to go,” he said again, his heart pounding with desperation to be back by Katniss’ side. “I’ll see you soon, ok?”

“Go on, get out of here,” he winked, raising his pint to his lips.

Ducking back through the crowds he soon found himself back by her side. Clasping her hand in his own he led her out of the pub, catching sight of Jenn watching the pair of them leave. He kept his head held high as he walked past, finally closing the door at last on the darkest chapter of his life. Katniss slipped her arm around his waist as they walked towards the taxi rank, and the pride he had felt earlier at being seen with such a beautiful woman increased tenfold. Now he wasn’t just with her. He was _loved_ by her.


	4. Remember Remember

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little quick note about the chapter titles; each of them come from a quote or poem about that particular month. This one comes from a very famous english poem. "Remember remember the fifth of November, Gunpowder treason and plot." The chapter has nothing to do with Guy Fawkes other than the date it's set, but seeing as it's set on the fifth of November, it seemed an appropriate chapter title!

## November

Jo had wanted Katniss to take her to Thorpe Park at Halloween for the last couple of years. She had described the mazes that got set up purely for the Halloween season, filled with actors in costume ready to jump out at any moment, and how she desperately wanted to go. Katniss had made excuses each time as to why she wouldn’t go, but the truth was she was nervous. She wasn’t a fan of rollercoasters or indeed anything where her life wasn’t firmly in her own hands, and the idea of being in a darkened maze while blood-covered actors jumped out on her wasn’t her idea of a good time.

Much to Katniss’ utter horror and chagrin, this year Jo happened to mention her desire to go to Thorpe one evening when Gale had stopped by for a beer. 

“Thorpe Park’s owned by Merlin Attractions, right?” he asked.

“Dunno,” replied Jo. “Sounds about right.”

He nodded thoughtfully before speaking again. “You remember that shoot I did earlier this year at the London Eye?”

“Uh-huh,” said Jo, while at the same time, Katniss felt a sinking sensation in her stomach as she began to predict where the conversation was going.

“As part of my payment, I was given four VIP passes to any Merlin-owned attraction in the country. We’d get free entry, be able to queue jump all day, even get discounts on food and drink.”

“Well,” said Jo, with an unnaturally wide grin on her face, “that’s settled. Try and worm your way out that one, Brainless. No excuses this time.”

She allowed herself a small smirk as she pulled out the ace up her sleeve. “I’m not doing anything like that without Peeta. Sorry,” she added glancing between Jo and Gale. She hated using Peeta as an excuse, but she really did not want to be forced into going. The last time Peeta and Gale had been in the same room, they had been at severe loggerheads, resulting in Gale showing Peeta that Katniss had not been entirely truthful with him. It had almost cost them their entire relationship.

Gale seemed to be debating something with himself. He rubbed his hand over his face briefly before pushing his hair back off his forehead. “I’ve got four passes, Katniss. You should see if he wants to come.” She stared at him for a moment, completely speechless, before he continued talking. “I mean it, Katniss. He’s part of your life now, it’s not like we can avoid each other forever.”

“It probably wouldn’t be his thing,” said Katniss, desperately clutching at straws.

“What do you mean ‘it wouldn’t be his thing’? Who doesn’t like theme parks?” said Gale incredulously.

“Peeta has better things to worry about than rollercoasters and scary mazes.”

“He wants to know when we’re going so he can see if someone can cover him at home,” piped up Jo, reading a text from her phone, a sly smirk across her face.

“Did you….did you just text him?” said Katniss, anger lacing the edge of her voice.

“Yup. And I’d say that judging by how quickly he got back to me this is precisely ‘his thing.’”

“How—? What—? How do you even have his number?” stammered Katniss.

“Got it off your phone ages ago. Just in case.”

“Oh, and do the pair of you have long cozy chats often?”

“Alright, Little Miss Jealousy. Calm yourself down. I’m not after your man, you’d know it if I was. But you can quit making excuses now. We don’t have to pay, there’s no waiting around, there’s cheap food, and you get to cry on Peeta’s shoulders if it gets too much.”

“Not necessarily. He might not find cover. We’ve had to put plans on hold before because of that.”

“How about you find out when he can get cover, and we’ll plan it from there?” suggested Gale. 

Katniss seethed at her friends for a moment before snatching up her phone. “I’m so unimpressed with all three of you right now,” she muttered as she stormed in to her room. As soon as she slammed her bedroom door, she dialled Peeta’s number. After just a single ring he answered.

“Hey gorgeous, I’ve missed you.”

“How long have you Jo been texting each other?”

The pause he gave before speaking seemed, in Katniss’ mind, to drag on for hours. “What?”

“You heard me. Text each other often, do you?”

“What? No!”

“What do the two of you talk about?”

“Katniss, I— “

“Do you talk about me behind my back, is that what’s going on?”

“Katniss, nothing’s going on!” he said, and he sounded so amused by the situation that Katniss began to think that maybe she had overreacted. “I got a text off her about two months ago saying ‘Its Jo, this is my number just in case you ever needed it’ and I haven’t heard from her since. Until just now.”

“Oh.” Her room suddenly felt incredibly hot, and she could feel her cheeks burning. 

“So, um… When are you planning this trip to Thorpe?” he asked, clearly trying to change the subject so she could save face.

“You don’t really want to go, do you?” she asked, sitting heavily on the end of her bed.

“Absolutely, I want to go! I think I was about eighteen the last time I went to a theme park.”

“Even with Gale there?”

“Gale will be there?” he repeated, and Katniss was pleased to hear that his tone was flat. Maybe there was still a chance that she could get out of it…

“Yes,” she replied. “They’re his passes we’d be using.”

“Ok,” he said at last.

“What?”

“Ok, I mean, you said ages ago that we couldn’t avoid each other forever. You’re right. And if he behaves, I will too.”

She closed her eyes and collapsed back against her bed, feeling her last excuse to get out of the trip disappear. Neither Gale nor Jo would take ‘no’ for an answer, and she didn’t want to let Peeta down when he’d initially been so excited over it…. “When can you make it?” she said eventually. “We’ll have to work around you.”

\----------------------------------

As it turned out, they almost missed out. The mazes stayed open until the fifth of November, and this happened to be the only day that Peeta was able to get Finn and Annie to cover for him, having still not found a suitable volunteer. When Jo was able to get the day off work too and Gale called to say that he didn’t have any assignments that day, she had to hide her mixed fear and disappointment. She was out of excuses. They were going. 

He arrived the night before so that they could all travel down to Thorpe Park early and make a full day of it. Gale turned up just as Katniss was making her first coffee of the day. His presence, coupled with the stiff and oddly formal greeting he and Peeta gave each other, did little to ease her rising anxiety.

The three of them sat in Katniss’ living room, silently sipping at their tea and coffee, waiting for Jo to get out of the shower so they could make tracks. Eventually Gale broke the awkward silence. “Look, um, no hard feelings, ok? I was out of line. I know that.”

As far as apologies were concerned, Katniss had heard better. But Gale’s pride meant he wasn’t big on apologies. If that was as good as it would get, so be it.

“Thank you,” said Peeta quietly, and Katniss could feel him relax ever so slightly next to her. He took a few more silent sips of his tea before breaking the silence himself this time. “So, how did you get these passes, then?” As he spoke, Katniss stretched her legs out over Peeta’s lap, cradling her mug of coffee while Peeta absent-mindedly ran his fingers up and down the side of her calf. 

“It was a promotional shoot at the London Eye. I photographed the Olympic Track and Field team, and was given them as a gift. Well, I say the Olympians. Wasn’t quite as good as that. Turns out it was only the Paralympic team.”

Katniss felt Peeta tense underneath her; his fingers ceased moving and she noticed his mouth had become a hard line. “That was still a great job, Gale,” she said, hoping she could get his focus to shift to a more positive view.

“It’s hardly as prestigious though,” he retorted. “I mean, come on, name one Paralympian. Other than the guy who’s standing trial for murder.” When both Katniss and Peeta failed to answer, he said, “See? And I bet you’ve only heard of Pistorius since he killed his girlfriend.”

“They’re incredible athletes, though. Better than any of us.”

“Oh come on, Katniss. No one watches it for the athletics. They watch it for the freakshow.”

“Freakshow?” said Peeta quietly. His grip on Katniss’ leg had become almost painfull, but she didn’t want to draw any extra attention to Peeta.

“Gale, they’re not freaks. That’s a horrible thing to say.”

“Whatever, Catnip. But if I was given the choice between Jessica Ennis or one of her limbless Paralympic counterparts I know who I’d choose. Am I right?” He directed this last at Peeta, trying for some typical male camaraderie. 

It took Peeta a moment to answer, and when he did, Katniss couldn’t help but notice the tone of forced calm. “I’d hope that I’d be able to see past anything like that.”

Gale raised his eyebrow before he gulped back half of his coffee. “Well, you’re either trying to sound noble to impress Katniss, or you’re a braver man than me.”

“Brave? What’s bravery got to do with it?”

“When I got offered the job I was halfway through a shoot for _Men’s Health_ magazine. They were doing a spot on Christopher Marvel.”

Katniss looked utterly blank while Peeta continued to stare blindly in front of him, all the while gripping tightly to her leg.

“You know,” continued Gale, “England’s centre-forward? ‘Captain’ Marvel? Anyway, he’s a right laugh, and I got the call for the Paralympics job when we were on lunch. He showed me something on his phone, and once you’ve seen it, you can’t un-see it. Look up ‘Two guys, One stump.’ Believe me, you see that shit you’d never want to hook up with one of them either. When I was photographing them it was all I could think of.”

It was lucky that at that moment Jo came bursting in to the room. “We ready to go then?” she said.

Gale knocked back the remainder of his coffee and stood up, following Jo from the living room. Peeta stayed sat unnaturally still for a few moments longer before Katniss spoke in a hushed tone. “He doesn’t know, Peeta. He wasn’t saying those things as a dig at you.”

After a moment Peeta sagged in apparent defeat. “I know, Katniss. Can’t you see how much worse that makes it? He wasn’t saying it to have a go, that’s what he actually thinks.”

“We don’t have to go,” she suggested hopefully. “We could have a day here, just the two of us.”

For a moment her hopes were raised as he appeared to be considering her offer. “No,” he said at last. “No, I want to go. I’ve been looking forward to it.”

With a nod and a defeated sigh she swung her legs off him and stood up. “Let’s go then,” she said. It was going to be a long day.

\--------------------------------------------------

Jo didn’t drive, and living so close to Central, Gale couldn’t see the point of owning a car in London, so it was up to either Peeta or Katniss to get them to Thorpe. Peeta tried to insist, but Katniss shot him down; her car was bigger, more comfortable, and she didn’t think it fair to get him to drive after he’d driven all the way from Suffolk the night before. She also thought that the drive would help steady her nerves by giving her something to focus on.

It took just under an hour to reach Thorpe, and the car park was surprisingly empty for such an unseasonably sunny day. This surprised Katniss until she remembered that the kids had just returned to school after half-term.

“Perfect,” said Jo, as they clambered out of Katniss’ car. “It feels a bit like summer but with the added bonus of no brats running around under our feet.”

“So, what do you want to do first?” Gale asked as the four of them made their way towards the entrance gate.

“Get a tea. Without a doubt,” replied Peeta.

Gale looked at him incredulously for a moment. “You had one less than an hour ago,” he snorted.

“Yup. And blood analysis would show I’m made of about seventy-five percent tea. If I don’t keep my levels topped up bad things start to happen.”

Peeta’s request turned out to not be as simple as it initially sounded. The four of them trawled the food kiosks for a good twenty minutes until they finally found one that offered soy milk as an option. Katniss noticed that Gale had been biting his tongue, stopping himself from making any kind of comments, while Jo was shifting impatiently from foot to foot. Their obvious agitation at waiting around while Peeta nursed his prize caused her already frayed nerves to build even further, compounded by the discussion Jo started about where they were going to begin their day.

After looking at the map they had picked up on entry to the Park, Johanna insisted on doing the _Saw_ ride first. Katniss swallowed apprehensively. She wasn’t a fan of the _Saw_ movies and she wasn’t a fan of rollercoasters; the two combined felt like something from her worst nightmares. Then there was the fact that she was dreading the mazes they’d be going through later. As they arrived at the queue entrance, the sound of tortured screams were being played out over the PA system. Panic welled up in her.

“No,” she said firmly. “Fuck this, you guys go on, I’m not doing it.”

“Really?” Peeta said, disappointment evident even in just that one word, as he looked up at the ride in longing. He turned to Gale and Johanna, who were itching to go. “We’ll wait here for you.”

“We? No, Peeta, you go, I’ll be fine.”

“I’m not leaving you on your own.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“But I’m not leaving you.”

Katniss took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “You really don’t have to, Peeta.”

“Look,” he said, his tone light-hearted as he pulled her into a hug. “I just want to spend the day with you. If that means I have to spend the whole day on the side-lines watching other people have fun and missing out on it myself then so be it.”

She glared daggers at him as he tried to hide the fact that he was trying not to laugh. “Fine,” she snapped. “Let’s go.” She grabbed hold of his hand and marched towards the fast-track line.

“Nice manipulation,” Gale chuckled, as he patted Peeta on the shoulder, a newfound respect in his voice. “Never known anyone to be able to get her to change her mind on anything so quickly.”

Katniss put on a brave face, but she still held steady to Peeta as they made their way closer and closer to the start of the ride. She hated feeling like this - and it was daytime and out in the open. She dreaded to think what it was going to be like in a dark and enclosed space when the mazes opened later, with the bloodied actors running at them. Her sense of dread increased as they quickly moved ahead of the waiting people thanks to their fast-track passes. The waiting area had been designed to look like Jigsaw’s workshop: dead bodies, blood splatters, spiked torture devices, chains, and in pride of place a reverse bear trap. She kept her head down and clutched Peeta’s hand a little tighter.

“Are you ok?” Peeta asked her, slipping his arm around her waist as they stood at the head of the queue, waiting for the next carriage.

“Mmm-hmm,” she nodded, unable to trust herself to open her own mouth.

When the carriage finally arrived, and the previous occupants departed the seats, windswept and exhilarated, Katniss felt barely able to breathe. Peeta leant in towards her and whispered, “Are you sure you want to do it? I won’t think anything less of you if you’ve changed your mind.”

He was being genuine, she was certain. But his kind words made her even more determined. Gripping his hand tighter than ever, she marched through the barriers and took a seat, ensuring Peeta was one side of her, Gale on the other.

As the safety locks came down, securing them in place, she felt like she was being led to her death. This wasn’t helped when the cart stopped abruptly just around the corner. A loud chuckling noise echoed all around them and from around a corner, cycling in on a tricycle, the puppet from the _Saw_ films appeared. 

“Holy shit,” she whispered, as he slowly turned to look at them. 

After a moment he spoke in a menacing rasp. “You have been locked in to a mechanical restraint from which there is no escape. Ahead are a series of devices that will determine your existence. Time is against you. Live or die. Make your choice. Let the games begin.” 

She was vaguely aware of the laughter coming from either side of her; Peeta, Johanna, and Gale were having the time of their lives as the carriage jerked in to life again.

“Peeta, I’ve changed my mind,” she called out, turning her head slightly to face him, just as the carriage began to move inexorably forward.

“You’ll be fine,” he called back. “Try and relax.” He dropped his arm so she could grab hold of his fingers which she gratefully gripped as tight as possible.

She took a deep breath, trying to keep her breathing under control. Swinging in front of them were two giant blades. _‘They’ll stop when we reach them,’_ she thought desperately. _’They’ll stop when we reach them.’_

But just before they reached the point of no return, the carriage plunged vertically downwards into blackness. She screamed as she immediately dropped Peeta’s hand, clutching for dear life on to the safety harness holding her in place. Strobe lights afforded the riders glimpses of bloodied spikes below them, which they seemed to avoid by millimetres, and all hell broke loose. Air cannons fired in their faces as the sounds of guns roared in their ears. Water sprayed in their faces from severed arteries, bodies were everywhere… And suddenly they were back outside as the train seemed to slow to halt. Katniss breathed a sigh of relief but only momentarily. The track in front of them was pointing directly into the sky. 

Televisions flicked in to life on either side of them, and that hateful puppet was back. “Game over.”

She kept her eyes tight shut as she could feel herself flat on her back tilted towards the sky. “Ohfuckohfuckohfuckohfuck….”

“Open your eyes,” she could hear Peeta laughing. “This is amazing!”

She dared to open them just a crack just as the carriage came to the very top of the incline. She had no idea how high they were, but the wind was far more pronounced up here, whipping her hair around her face. Risking a glance at the ground, she looked at the people walking on the safe earth below, at how small they appeared from way up high. “Peeta, you fucking _arse,_ ” she cried, her words becoming lost as the carriage reached the very top of the incline, flipping over to face directly downwards, and it plunged towards the ground, narrowly missing more spinning blades and throwing them into several loops and twists. She clung on for dear life, completely unable to move until, at long last, the carriage finally came to a complete stop and their safety harnesses were released. 

She clambered unsteadily to her feet and staggered off to one side, Peeta supporting her with an arm around her waist. As she looked up into his grinning face, his clear blue eyes sparkling mischievously, she began to laugh uncontrollably. “You ok?” he grinned.

“Yeah,” she chuckled. “No thanks to you.” She playfully smacked the top of his arms.

“What?” he said, mock offended. “I looked after you!”

“How, exactly?!”

“You’re safe, right?” he said, still chuckling. She rolled her eyes at him in response. “And,” he continued, “I bet you feel really alive right now, yeah?” She pursed her lips, refusing to answer and prove him right. “Well. You have me to thank for feeling that way. You’re welcome.”

“I’ll get you back for this,” she promised.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, throwing his arm over her shoulder as they left the ride exit.

Despite her show of annoyance, Katniss was immensely proud of herself for overcoming her initial fear. And Peeta was right. She really did feel alive - and strangely excited to try the next ride out. 

Her confidence increased as the day went by; the only ride she couldn’t bring herself to go on was _Stealth_ ; the 200-foot practically vertical drop was simply too much for her to handle. Peeta stayed by her side as Gale and Jo rode it together. “I’m sorry,” she said to him. “It’s just too much.”

“You know,” he said thoughtfully, “I’m really surprised. I mean, I’ve seen how you climb trees, so you can’t be scared of heights.”

“Ok, buster, number one, I’ve never climbed a 200-foot tree before, and secondly I’m not afraid of heights. It’s the plummeting towards the ground at eighty miles an hour I’m not too keen on.”

He swept his arms around her waist and pulled her in close to him. “I told you,” he said, pressing gentle kisses down her neck and sending a jolt of heat straight to her core, “I’d look after you.”

She melted into his embrace, cupping the side of his face and bringing him to face her, meeting his lips with hers. “You could have gone on without me,” she said, flushed and slightly breathless. 

“I could have,” he replied. “But I’ve wanted to get you alone all day.”

“We’re hardly alone, Peeta,” she chuckled as she looked around at the masses.

“I know, but this is the most alone we’ve been.” He pulled her body flush with his and let out a heavy sigh. “God, I can’t wait to get you home,” he said in a low voice.

“Ugh, me too.”

“You’re having a good time though?”

“It’s ok,” she replied, not wanting to admit that she was enjoying herself far more than she had anticipated.

“Just ok?”

“Yeah. Well, better than I thought at least. It’s ok,” she replied.

“Bollocks. I think I actually heard you laugh more than scream on the last ride.”

“Alright, alright. I’m having a good time, ok?”

“Have you got your camera?” Peeta asked, seemingly randomly, and with a tone of urgency in his voice.

“Sure,” she replied, pulling it out of her handbag and handing it to him. He put his arm around her shoulders and held the camera at length, pointing it at themselves. After he took the photo and checked that it had come out ok, Katniss asked, “What was so urgent that it needed a photo there and then?”

He shrugged. “I just wanted to capture the moment that Katniss Everdeen admitted she was wrong.”

She playfully pushed him away. “Yeah, well, don’t tell Jo, ok? I’ll never live it down.”

“Your secret is safe with me,” he winked.

It didn’t take long for the Gale and Jo to return to them, by which point it was nearing four o’clock, and the mazes were about to open. According to the park guide they had picked up when they first arrived, the nearest one to them was _Asylum._

“You ready for this?” Jo asked them all as she led the way.

Swallowing the nerves that threatened to overcome her, and clutching even tighter to Peeta’s arm, Katniss said, “Fine. Let’s get this over with.”

She very nearly bottled it. A park attendant lined them up before they went in to explain the rules, and Katniss focused all her energy on breathing and trying to stay calm. The only real thing in the world was the warmth of Peeta’s hand as it engulfed her own.

“Number one rule,” called out the attendant. “Do not touch the actors under any circumstance. They are going to come very close to you. They are going to be moving erratically. Do not touch them and certainly do not hit them. You will be removed from the park if you do. It is their job to scare you, not the other way around, so don’t try to scare them. It won’t work and you’ll only end up looking like a fool, and ruining the experience for yourself. Do not enter the maze if you suffer from light sensitive epilepsy. Do not enter if you have a heart condition. Do not enter if you are pregnant.”

For a moment Katniss seriously considered lying in order to get out of having to go in but before she knew it they were entering… god only knew what. She made Peeta go first, clutching him round the middle and resting her face on his strong back. 

They stepped inside, Jo leading the way, Gale not far behind her. As soon as the doors to outside were closed behind them, they were plunged in to a world of darkness and chaos. They were in a long corridor. Low lighting showed more blood-splattered walls and up ahead, at the end of the corridor, strobe lighting flickered violently.

Even through closed eyes, she could see the strobe lighting flashing through her lids as she buried her face in to Peeta’s back. As they rounded the corner, she could feel the muscles in his back tense as he paused and let out a low hiss of an exhalation. She risked opening her eyes a crack, and as she did, she suddenly felt all the nerves melt away. 

There was no real danger here; it was all just a game, a pretence. The strobe lighting meant she was able to see the actors as they climbed along the top of the wire fences. She peered round the side of him and could see Jo and Gale a little way up ahead, Jo jumping a little as an actor approached them before she fell on to Gale, howling with laughter. “Peeta,” she shouted over the incessant noise of the room’s soundtrack, as she squeezed him a little, “We don’t want to get left behind.”

He seemed to remember to move as she spoke. He took a couple of hesitant steps forward, and as he did, Katniss noticed movement above them. A girl in a nightdress, with long lank hair and a cut running diagonally across her face, was scampering along the fences and bars above them. She paused just ahead of where they were walking, swung down and dropped to her feet, landing just inches in front of Peeta before screeching and running away. He practically jumped out of his skin. “Ah, fuck!” he exclaimed, tensing even further. 

Katniss started to laugh at the ridiculous situation. “Are you ok?” she asked.

“Mmm-hmm,” he responded, before shouting, “Shit!” moments later as the girl darted in front of them again. 

“Are you… are you actually scared?”

“It’s fine. I’m fine,” he said, continuing to shuffle forwards but gripping on to Katniss’ arms around his waist.

“Do you want me to go first?” she said, a grin spreading over her face.

In response he nodded briefly and manoeuvred her in front of him, pushing her forwards. Every now and then she could feel him tense up, or hear him swear. The actors in the maze seemed to pick up on his reactions and focused all their attention on him. Running her fingers over the back of his hands, she could feel how cold and clammy his skin had become as he gripped her tighter and tighter.

She was amazed at how quick the actors were, how agile and nimble, how they could appear from nowhere and vanish in a split second, but she found the whole scenario funny rather than frightening. 

At long last, they rounded a corner in to what looked like the final corridor. There were no strobes here. Instead, the corridor was bathed in dark red light that very occasionally flickered off and back on again, and all she could feel were Peeta’s arms shaking slightly around her. Just feet to their right they were startled by a loud sound - that of a small petrol engine starting up and being revved. It sounded like a chainsaw.

“It’s ok,” she heard Peeta saying behind her. “It’s not real. It’s not real. It’s not real.”

Ahead of them, a small patch of natural light showed that they were close to the exit when out of the shadows burst the final actor, wearing an open straitjacket and wielding the chainsaw high above his head. He charged towards them. “Fucking run!” shouted Peeta, pushing her forwards towards the safety of the real world. They burst through to find Jo and Gale waiting for them, breathless with nervous laughter. 

“That was fucking awesome,” said Jo, doubled over to get her breath back. “We’re definitely doing that one again.”

“No. No way. Fuck that,” said Peeta, shaking his head. Katniss noticed how furiously flushed his cheeks were and couldn’t help but burst into laughter.

“Oh, come on,” said Jo, standing up straight again, “You some kind of pussy or something?” 

“If it means I don’t have to go back in there then yes. And proud.”

“Your loss,” she shrugged in response.

Ignoring her jibes Katniss stepped in front of him and ran her hand down the side of his face. “Are you ok?” she asked him gently.

“Uh-huh. That was fucked up.” He pushed his hair back of his face and began to laugh nervously. “I need a drink.”

“Whatever happened to _‘I’ll look after you’_?”

He looked a little sheepish as he spoke. “Maybe….maybe we need to make that more of a mutual arrangement?”

“So we’ll look after each other from now on?”

“Perfect,” he said as she melted in to his arms.

“You know I’m going to have to make you go through all the other mazes too, though?”

“Why would you be so cruel?”

“I did promise I’d get you back. And I don’t want to break a promise.”

His usual self-deprecating laugh caused Katniss to chuckle as well. “Fine,” he answered, shaking his head with a half-smile. “Find me a beer first though. If I’m going through that again I need a little Dutch courage.”

Peeta didn’t fare much better going through _Hellgate_ or _The Curse_ , even with the addition of the confidence-bolstering alcohol coursing through him. He flat-out refused to go through _Se7en_. 

“Please, Katniss, no more. I can’t take it,” he said as they stood outside the maze’s entrance, and Katniss had to admit that even in the low-light Peeta looked far paler than usual. “I just want to go and sit down somewhere with a beer and a packet of crisps and try and feel a bit more human.”

“This one is supposed to be the most tame out of all of them,” said Gale, and Katniss really hoped that Peeta didn’t pick up on the slight smirk in his voice.

“Honestly, I don’t care. I think a child in a white sheet saying ‘Boo’ would be enough to give me a heart attack right now.”

“You two go ahead. We’ll be in the bar, ok?” said Katniss, talking Peeta’s clammy hand in her own. “How are you doing, soldier?” she asked him once they were alone and seated, Peeta clutching a pint of Peroni and a pack of salt and vinegar crisps.

“Better, thanks,” he said, staring at a few drops of condensation that had formed on the side of his pint glass, tracing their path with his fingertips. He sighed heavily before taking a swig.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, laying a hand on his forearm.

“Your friends probably think I’m a right dick.”

“Who cares?” she said. “I know you’re not and that’s all that matters, surely?”

“Thanks for confirming it,” he said with a slightly sad smile.

“I didn’t mean it that way, and you know it,” she countered, tucking a few loose curls behind his ear. “I just meant that you need to stop worrying about what other people think, because it doesn’t matter.”

“I can’t help wanting to be liked, Katniss. No one wants to be disliked, do they?”

“No, but you’re never going to please everyone,” she replied. 

“Doesn’t stop me from wanting to try.”

They sat together in silence for a few moments before Katniss spoke up again. “Thank you for giving Gale another chance, Peeta. I can’t tell you how much it means to me. And I know you two stepped off on the wrong foot— “

“Understatement of the century.”

“—And I know he inadvertently messed up first thing today— “

“Again, bit of an understatement.”

“—So thank you for keeping your cool over it. Really did mean a lot to me.”

“Look, Katniss, I doubt we’ll ever be best friends— “

“I’m not asking you to be,” she interjected.

“I know. And to be honest I don’t know that I can promise I’ll ever count him as a mate. We’re just too different. But for you, I’ll keep trying.”

She cupped the side of his face, and he closed his eyes at her gentle touch. “You’re a really great guy, Peeta. I don’t think I’ve told you that enough lately.”

“Even though in the event that we find ourselves in a haunted asylum full of chainsaw wielding zombies I’ll need you to take the lead and save us?”

“Despite that, yes.”

The corners of his mouth lifted in a genuine smile for the first time since they sat down. “Thanks, kiddo. You’re not so bad yourself.”

“And hey, if we find ourselves in some kind of situation where we’re 200-feet in the air, strapped in a car and hurtling to the ground at eighty miles an hour, I know I’ll be able to count on you.” 

As his smile widened she brought his face to hers for a kiss. They had promised to look after each other. And she fully intended to keep that promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought long and hard about who was going to be most scared in the mazes. Originally it was going to be Katniss, but honestly, it makes far more sense for it to be Peeta. I’d like to just iterate – it doesn’t make him a coward! I worked as an actor in scare mazes for 6 and a half years (and have worked at the ones mentioned in this story!) and it was amazing how much being in those places changed people. People who were utterly terrified before they came through might end up seeing it for what it was and just finding the whole thing a bit boring and silly, and people who were fine outside ended up getting really into it once inside. We’d often see boyfriends cowering behind their girlfriends, but one thing was very apparent; creative minds were always much more affected than logical, analytical ones. And as I said, I worked in these places for 6 and half years and I still get nervous going through them, even though I know exactly what the actors are going to be doing moments before and after I’ve seen them, how all they’ll be talking about is what they want for dinner, how bloody bored they are, how they’ll be taking the piss out of whoever just screamed etc etc… They still get me every bloody time. So yeah, bearing all that in mind it really does make more sense for Peeta to have been really affected in there, far more than Katniss, Jo or Gale would have been ;)


	5. A Compulsory Thunderstorm

## December

Christmas was not Peeta’s favourite time of year. The memories of his accident and subsequent loneliness were still too raw. 

His first Christmas after it all had been hard. Terribly hard—but, thanks to his friends, just about bearable. Although he had woken up depressed and alone on Christmas morning, Finnick and Annie had made arrangements to come over in the early afternoon. Once they had helped him finish his care duties, the three of them had Christmas dinner together then played games and drank mulled wine well in to the night, helping him to forget the suffocating loneliness that he feared would otherwise consume him. 

Last year, however, had been awful. He closed his eyes, and time slipped back an entire year, as if it were just yesterday.

Finnick and Annie had long wanted to go on holiday for Christmas, and had finally decided to do it last year. Two weeks in the Swiss Alps. And it had been a shocking revelation to Peeta just how much he relied on them both for company. They’d arranged to have a belated Christmas Day together when they got back, and Peeta figured he’d just treat the 25th like any other day. He hadn’t bothered putting up any decorations at all, not seeing the point when it was only going to be for his own benefit. The lack of decorations would also help him keep up the pretence that the 25th was just another day. But as time dragged inexorably onwards, and it loomed ever closer, he began to realise how much he was dreading being entirely alone at Christmas. 

On Christmas Eve he thought about making some kind of festive effort. He poured a couple of bottles of red wine into a pan, added some cinnamon, some cloves, a little grated nutmeg, some sugar, a generous glug of brandy and some chopped apples and oranges, and set it over a low heat. It didn’t take long for the glorious smell of mulled wine to start to permeate his home, and, inspired, he then set about making mince pies, cheese straws and sausage rolls as well. 

With something to focus on he stopped dreading the next day quite so much. He began with the short-crust pastry for the pies, as that would need to rest in the fridge for at least a couple of hours before it could be used. While letting the pastry rest, he made the sausage meat from a mix of ground walnuts, hazelnuts, spiced peaches and puy lentils, and made the rolls with some pre-bought flaky pastry. The cheese straws were a variation on his father’s recipe, using his own homemade cashew cheese, and topped with toasted sunflower seeds and some smoked paprika. 

Keeping his hands busy stopped his mind from wandering too far down dark paths, and he felt almost cheery as he rolled the pastry out. He took his time, carefully cutting out the pastry shells, filling them with a spiced fruit mix laced with a little brandy, then placing a delicately cut holly leaf, Christmas tree or star shape on the top before putting everything in to the oven. While waiting for them to cook, he took the opportunity to play with the cats for a while, getting them to chase the beam from a laser pen across his kitchen floor; a fruitless task for them but one which all three got highly involved in.

Once the food had come out of the oven and cooled, he mixed together some powdered sugar and cinnamon, and used a small sieve to coat each of the mince pies with a light dusting of it, giving them the impression of being covered with a faint layer of sparkling snow. He placed the sieve down and smiled at his handiwork. 

That was when the loneliness truly began to strike. He looked at the mountain of food he had prepared, as if he were expecting a house full of guests. “Now what?” he said to himself, his voice hoarse from lack of use. His eyes turned to the pan full of mulled wine, steaming gently on top of the hob. Two whole bottles of wine. Far too much for him to drink alone…. He began to recall his first Christmas in this house. He and Jenn had been so happy. If he closed his eyes, he almost could picture her sat in her usual spot at the kitchen table. Sometimes when he was cooking she’d stand behind him, wrap her arms around his waist and press her lips between his shoulder blades, distracting him until he couldn’t take it anymore and he’d be forced to put whatever he was doing on hold. He’d turn suddenly, scoop her up in his arms, and she would wrap her legs around his waist, he’d pin her to the wall, and together their kisses would meld seconds in to minutes, minutes in to hours… Peeta could almost feel her presence now; he could almost feel her lips as they claimed his over and over and over again.

He felt a deep pang of loss at the memories. He was no longer in love with her, that much he knew, but it didn’t stop him dwelling on their happier times together. He missed her company. He missed her laughter, her jokes; he missed her brutal honesty, and he missed how tender she was when the two of them were alone…

Mulled wine was her favourite drink. She used to long for winter—and for Christmas especially—as it meant they could have a good reason to have a mug every single evening. He began to imagine her excited impatience as it was gently warming up, wanting Peeta to turn the heat higher to get it done faster. She would hover next to the hob, dipping the ladle in to the pan for just a little taste before it was ready, and Peeta would tell her that if she kept it up there would be none left, and she would laugh and say it was the perfect excuse to make even more.

With a smile, he took two mugs down from the cupboard. They had always intended to buy some glass mugs to serve mulled wine in and had somehow never gotten around to it. Using a ladle, he poured a serving in to her favourite mug, the _Wizard of Oz_ one that she still loved despite the chip in the rim and the slightly cracked handle, and another serving in to the Spiderman mug she had bought him from a service station on a whim one day. She had filled it with Jelly Tots and Opal Fruits and had decorated it with a stick-on bow and had handed it to him as soon as she walked in through the front door. He had asked what the occasion was. “No special occasion,” she had replied. “I just love you, is all.” 

It was only as he picked up the two steaming mugs and turned around to face the empty kitchen that he realised precisely what he had done. Jenn wasn’t there. Of course she wasn’t there. But he had, for a brief moment, convinced himself he wasn’t alone.

With a heavy, shuddering sigh he poured the spare mug of the potent concoction back in to the pan, then placed a cheese straw, a sausage roll, and a mince pie on a small plate and took himself into his living room to sit down and try to enjoy the fruits of his labour. The silence in his home seemed suddenly oppressive and he found himself dreading the morning.

The clock on the wall told him it was just after 9 p.m. and he was just considering whether to go to bed purely to make time pass quicker when he heard a knock at his door. The sudden loud bang made him start slightly, and wondering who on earth it could be, he went to open his front door.

A group of about ten children, aged somewhere between eight and twelve, with a striking young woman with fiery ginger hair guiding them, were gathered on his doorstep. Some of the children were carrying lanterns, some were wearing Santa hats, and all were bundled up against the cold. As soon as Peeta opened his door, the woman offered a few words of encouragement to the children, and the group began to sing ‘ _We Wish You a Merry Christmas._ ’

Peeta leant against his doorframe, smiling as he listened to the song and clapping loudly when they finished. “That was fantastic, thank you,” he said to the gathered ensemble.  
“We’re collecting for the children’s ward of Ipswich Hospital,” said the striking redhead, holding up a bucket. “We’re hiring children’s entertainers to go around the ward tomorrow, and bring a little Christmas magic to the kids who can’t be at home.”

Her words brought the memories of his stay in that hospital two years prior directly to the forefront of his memory, and it felt like being dowsed in ice cold water. Christmas on the ward… it may not have been Christmas Day for him, but it was close enough…. And where was his ‘Christmas magic?’ He shook the feeling away, and with a smile said, “Of course, let me just get my wallet.” He went back inside in to the warmth of his home, and found his wallet in the kitchen. The stacks of food he made caught his eye, and a notion occurred to him…. That redhead… She was rather attractive, in an unusual way…. And everyone out there must be freezing cold….

Taking ten pounds from his wallet, more than he would probably usually be able to afford to donate but he wanted to give a good impression, he made his mind up. As he dropped the note into the bucket, making sure she could see how much he’d put in, he said, “You know, it’s really cold out, and I’ve just made some mince pies and sausage rolls, and some mulled wine. Would you like to come in and warm yourselves for ten minutes?”

All the children turned to the woman and the chorus of, ‘Please, miss?’ ‘Can we?’ ‘Oh, please…’ almost drowned out her turning Peeta’s offer down.

“I don’t think mulled wine is a good idea for children, do you?”

“I’ve got some spiced apple juice I could warm up if you like? Or I could make hot chocolate? It’s really no trouble….” He realised that he really didn’t want to be alone, that once these people had gone, that was it. He’d likely not see anyone again until Finn and Annie’s return. The idea suffocated him; his lungs were suddenly filled with arctic water, he couldn’t breathe….

A second round of enthused begging from the children ignited a tiny spark of hope in him, which was very quickly doused by the woman. “No,” she said firmly. “I don’t really think it’s appropriate. We’re on quite a tight schedule, and these guys need to get home and get to bed, otherwise Father Christmas might not show up for them.” A few scandalised noises from the children told Peeta that the opportunity was slipping like fine sand through his fingers. “Thank you so much for your donation, it will make such a difference. Merry Christmas, and a happy new year to you.” 

“And the same to you,” Peeta said, trying to smile but being entirely aware that the expression did not meet his eyes. He watched the group of children excitedly walk away, closing the door when they reached the end of his driveway and turned down the road out of his view.

The silence felt even louder and more oppressive now than it had before. His breath came out in a deep, ragged shudder, and he rapidly blinked away the sheen of tears. “Merry fucking Christmas.” The words were barely above a whisper, but seemed to echo in the empty quiet of his home. He felt lost, unsure of what to do. Too awake to go to bed, but too fed up of being awake to stay up. Helping himself to another mug of mulled wine and adding an extra shot of brandy to the drink, he stretched out on his couch with the television on, turned the sound up, and tried to ignore the hollow feeling growing in his chest.

Three mugs of mulled wine later, he was feeling fuzzy headed and melancholy. There was no point staying up any longer, and so he dragged himself up to his bedroom, into his cold and lonely bed and forcibly promised himself out loud that the next day would be better.

And at first, his positive thinking worked. He woke early, took Belle for a walk, and managed to get all the CPL cats fed and cleaned before 9 a.m. After a light breakfast, he strolled out in to his back garden to feed the hens. Today wasn’t Christmas. It was just the same as any other day. Only…. as he worked in the cold winter air, it became apparent that it wasn’t like any other day. In the distance, church bells rang out in constant peals, and there was a certain sense of enchantment in the air that simply didn’t exist outside of Christmas Day. He had worked as quickly as he could to finish off his duties and get back inside, away from the sound of the cascading bells, away from the illusion of magic outside, back to a place where he could drink on his own to try and forget his solitude. 

Memories of the night before, of him inviting a stranger in to his home in a desperate attempt to try and combat the all-pervading sense of isolation that was his constant companion, returned with a vengeance. Twenty-six years old and he felt like this was it; this was all he had to look forward to for the rest of his days. A surfeit of alcohol only exasperated his negativity until at long last he wept himself to sleep with only his cats, his dog and a cheap bottle of whisky for company.

The memories of last Christmas were pretty far from pleasant. And when Katniss had asked him what he was doing for Christmas this year, those memories were dredged back to the surface.

“Peeta? You ok, hun?”

“Huh? Yeah. Yeah, I’m ok.”

“So, what do you want to do?”

“I can’t go anywhere, Katniss. I’ll have to stay at mine. It’s not like the animals can take a day off from needing to be fed.”

“Then I’ll come to you,” she said.

He shook his head. “You don’t need to do that,” he told her. “What about your mum? Or your sister?”

“Mum doesn’t know what day it is half the time, I’ll go see her soon, but I haven’t spent Christmas with her for years. And Prim’s likely to be working. But if she’s not, I’ll be up this way anyway, so I’d still like to see you.”

“Katniss, I…. I don’t know. I’m not great with…. this time of year.”

“All the more reason to not be alone, then.”

“I don’t want to bring you down.”

“Maybe I can bring you up.”

Everything she was saying made perfect sense. As much as he didn’t want to risk her seeing him at his absolute worst, he really didn’t want to have to face another Christmas on his own. “Ok then,” he nodded at last. “I don’t expect you to work on Christmas morning, though, so if you want to be with Prim and come over in the afternoon, I’d like that.”

She kissed his lips, sending a flood of warmth through his chest as the realisation hit him at last. He wouldn’t have to face Christmas alone again.

\-------------

On Christmas Eve, the snow began to fall—large, fluffy flakes that drifted down slowly from the sky and settled on the cold ground. After making sure the animals all had enough clean bedding and that the heating in their enclosures would provide them all with adequate warmth, he trudged his way indoors, leaving imprints of his thin, canvas trainers in the layer of crisp snow. As soon as he got indoors, he kicked his water-logged trainers off and peeled away his drenched socks, cursing under his breath at how cold his right foot felt. Grabbing a towel and drying himself roughly, he made a promise to himself try and buy some new shoes in the January sales; he’d put up with having a cold, wet foot for far too long, but new shoes always seemed like such a luxury.

Outside the snow began to fall faster and heavier, and Peeta felt the corners of his mouth lift in a little smile, eternally grateful that he had managed to get his outdoor chores finished before the weather got too bad. His mind drifted to Katniss…. Prim would be working on Christmas Day, so Katniss was spending the evening with her, and would head over to his at some point the following day. He hoped she wouldn’t have too much difficulty driving in the snow, and just as he began to worry for her safety, he received a text from her. ‘ _Just got to Prim’s. Phew! Will call you tonight. Love you xx._ ’

He looked out of the window at the falling snow once again. It certainly added an extra festive feel to the place. Just two days earlier, he had realised that Katniss would be expecting his home to be decorated for Christmas, and he had hauled himself up into the attic to try and find any old decorations. He breathed an enormous sigh of relief when he found the artificial tree and a box containing fairy lights and baubles and hurriedly put them up in his living room. He may not have appreciated the added clutter, but his cats certainly did, making a game of pulling the baubles from the lower branches and chasing them around on the floor, hiding them behind his sofa and under the coffee table.

With the rest of his day free, he began to repeat his routine from the previous year: slowly simmering a large pot of mulled wine, making mince pies and sausage rolls in preparation for the next day. Only this time he was doing it not to simply pass the time and try to keep loneliness at bay, but because he had someone to share it with. Whereas the previous year he had been dreading the morning, suddenly he began to feel a nervous excitement that he hadn’t felt in a long time. Maybe this year Christmas wasn’t going to be so bad after all….

\-----------------------

Katniss arrived not long after three in the afternoon, shaking from the bitter cold, and he immediately pressed a mug of cinnamon-and-cayenne-spiced hot chocolate into her hands to warm her up. “Perfect timing,” he said to her, kicking off his wet shoes and pouring a mug for himself. “I’ve just finished up outside.” 

“Excellent,” she replied. “Let me go and put your presents under the tree, and then we can help warm each other up before we open them. Wait here.” On almost silent feet, she ducked out of the kitchen, and as Peeta took a seat at his kitchen table, he could hear his front door open as Katniss nipped back out into the cold to retrieve presents from the car. He cradled his mug of chocolate, sipping at the reviving liquid until Katniss returned a few minutes later. Setting his mug down on the table, he put his arms out to her, and she took a seat in his lap, her arms around his shoulders.

“Missed you,” he said in a low voice as he nuzzled into her neck.

“You too,” she replied as she ran a finger down the side of his face. “Oh, and before I forget….” She snatched her handbag up from the floor and rummaged inside for a few moments, withdrawing a small plant covered in white berries, which she held above her head with wide-eyed innocence. Peeta smiled as he tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear before gently cupping the side of her face and drawing her towards him. Their lips met briefly before she rested her forehead against his and said, “Merry Christmas.”

“Same to you.”

They held each other, soaking up each other’s warmth until Katniss broke the comfortable silence. “What’s for dinner? I’ve never had Christmas without turkey before.”  
“Then your Christmases have been boring. Must be so dull, having the same thing year in, year out.”

“Alright,” she said, sounding offended. “Christmas hasn’t ever been dull, thank you, and there’s more to Christmas Day than food.”

“I know that, and yet you’d be surprised how, when you suggest to most people that they try and imagine a Christmas without a dead, tortured bird whose anal cavity has been filled with minced pig, they’ll lose their fucking minds.” He took a deep breath before continuing. He massively appreciated the changes that Katniss had made in herself but couldn’t help the annoyance that she still thought of all that death as normal. Biting his tongue, as he didn’t want to get into a discussion about it on Christmas Day, he said, “Anyway, we’re having beetroot salad with lemon tamari vinaigrette and baked hazelnut cheese for a starter, balsamic walnut and lentil pie with carrot and tamarind chutney for a main course, and orange and Cointreau crème brûlée for dessert.” She nodded, but seemed unwilling to look at him and he experienced a sinking feeling. She’d not been there ten minutes, and he was already managing to fuck Christmas up for both of them. “Sorry,” he said quietly.

“For what?”

Swallowing the lump in his throat he desperately searched for the right words to say. “For suggesting that your Christmases haven’t been up to scratch. Sorry. I told you, I’m not good at this time of year.”

“Forget it,” she said after a pause, taking a deep breath before continuing. “Anyway, how would you like to get me something warm and alcoholic to drink and then open some presents?”

He nodded as she stood up off his lap and wandered through to the living room. As he watched her go, he sat back in his chair, pushed his hair off his face, and he promised himself he’d redouble his efforts to make today work. 

“What do you want?” he called to her retreating form.

“What can you do for me?”

“Mulled wine or cider? Boozy coffee? Hot chocolate with a shot of Kahlua?”

“Surprise me.”

Hoping he was making the right choice, he flicked the kettle on and spooned some instant coffee into the bottom of a mug, topping it up with hot water as soon as it was ready, her favourite hazelnut milk, and a generous shot of Tia Maria, while making a simple tea for himself.

When he went through to the living room, he found Katniss sitting on the floor sitting next to what looked like a small mountain of presents. 

“Who are they for?” he asked her, while handing over the mug of coffee.

“You, silly.”

His stomach dropped once again. They hadn’t set any limits on what to get each other. He only had two presents for her, and neither had been particularly expensive. His two tiny gifts to her looked mean-spirited and pathetic next to the stack of parcels she’d got for him. Sharing Christmas had been a bad idea from the start, he knew that; he should have insisted, he should have put his foot down…

“Katniss,” he said quietly, and he could feel the heat radiating from his reddening cheeks, “you shouldn’t have done this.”

“But I wanted to.”

“Well, I wanted to too, but you know I can’t compete with all this.”

“It’s not a competition, Peeta,” she laughed.

“I know, but—“

“I wanted to treat you.”

“But—“

“Look, growing up I didn’t have much. I always wanted to treat my loved ones, and I couldn’t. Well, now I can, so don’t try and stop me from doing what I’ve always wanted to do.”  
Unable to meet her eyes, he sighed deeply. “Well, I’m the opposite. I’m still not used to having nothing to give. And I hate not being able to treat you.”

“Peeta,” she said, reaching out and stroking the side of his face, “I didn’t come here to be lavished with gifts. I came here to spend Christmas with you. So come back to me. Please.”

With a heavy, shuddering sigh, he nodded and accepted the box that Katniss was pressing upon him. “Thank you,” he said. “They look beautiful,” he said, carefully unsticking the sellotape at one end.

“You’ll have to thank Prim for that,” she said with a smile. “I could never make presents look so good.”

“Thanks, Prim,” he said, carefully unsticking the other end of the parcel, then running his finger under the edge of the paper, removing the whole sheet without a single rip or tear. “Oh Katniss,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper, as he looked at the box. A large, cardboard shoebox with ‘Vegetarian Shoes, Brighton’ printed in stark, bold letters across the top. He carefully lifted the lid from the top of the box. A pristine pair of 10-hole Para boots. He’d wanted a pair of these for years, but at a hundred quid a pair, he’d never been able to afford them. “You shouldn’t have done this,” he said, taking one of the boots out from the box and admiring it.

“Shut up. You needed new shoes. You can’t go around in winter in those thin little canvas things. It’s completely impractical.”

“Thank you.” He pulled her into a tight embrace. “Thank you so much.” 

“You’re welcome, angel. Open this one next,” she said, passing him another similar-sized box. Like before, he carefully unpicked the sellotape instead of ripping the paper apart. “This is as much for me as it is for you,” she confessed. “Probably more so.”

He couldn’t help but laugh as he opened the present: a complete set of the hardback editions of _Harry Potter._

“I’m going to go ahead and assume that you still haven’t taken my advice and read these?”

“You’ve assumed correctly.”

“Well, now you can make a start on them.”

“Maybe you could read them to me as bedtime stories.”

“If that’s what it takes, then fine.”

He smiled momentarily as turned the box set over in his hands, before he experienced yet another sinking sensation. Seven hardback books didn’t exactly come cheaply. He was just about to say something, but Katniss seemingly sensed the words that were about to come from him and cut him off. 

“If you’re going to mention money, you can stop. And besides, I’ll get just as much pleasure from them.”

“Thank you,” he said quietly. “If it’s really for you, I don’t need to feel as bad.” For a moment, he worried at his bottom lip before he spoke again. “Do you want to open one of yours next?” he asked her.

“Sure.”

He looked between the two gifts he’d got for her and handed her the larger of the two. “Sorry if it’s a bit shit.”

She took the neatly wrapped parcel from him and ripped open the end, tearing the paper away and stared at the book in her hands. At first she looked a little confused then her mouth dropped in amazement. The ridiculously long title of the book was: _Katniss & Peeta’s Adventures Through the Wardrobe of the Chocolate Factory Where The Wild Lord of the Rings met The Wonderful Big Friendly Cat in the Hat at the Centre of the Earth. _

He could feel his face burning bright red as she began to flick through the book. “I hope you don’t think it’s a bit egotistical.”

Each page was drawn in a different but very distinct style. Some pages featured two or more panels, some pages were just a single, detailed drawing, but all featured both of them in the midst of an adventure. He had tried to emulate as many famous artists and illustrators as possible. 

“When…? How…?” Katniss stuttered as she flicked through.

“I got the idea that day we spent in the park, at yours,” he confessed. “Where you had me drawing us as cartoon characters, and you told me I should set up an exhibition. I mean, I couldn’t do anything as ambitious as that but you got me thinking. And I’ve been working on this pretty much ever since. Whenever I had a few minutes to myself. Is it ok?”

“Peeta, it’s incredible,” she responded, a smile forming over her lips as she studied each drawing in depth. “How did you get this made into a proper book?”

“That was the easy bit,” he chuckled. “I found a website where you submit all the pages, and they print it and bind it for you. Are you sure it’s ok?”

“Yes, Peeta,” she said, getting slightly exasperated. “It’s perfect. Just perfect.”

“Open the other one,” he grinned. He handed the remaining parcel to her, and she ripped the paper off in seconds. She opened the box to show a small, silver locket hung on a simple chain. “Oh, Peeta….” she spoke in a hushed voice. “This is beautiful.”

“You like it?” he timidly asked her. “I’m sorry it’s not much….”

“Of course I like it, it’s gorgeous. Is there anything inside?” She pressed the little catch that opened the locket, and gasped at what she saw. In miniature, Peeta had painted the view from the honeysuckle arch down his garden, towards her favourite trees. A few dandelions were visible in the foreground, and the rose-tinted and orange sky showed that he had chosen to paint the scene at sunset.

“I thought you’d like to always have a piece of the countryside with you. So when you’re home and surrounded by grey buildings, you’ll always be able to see trees.”

Her fingers delicately traced over the tiny painting. “It’s me who should be embarrassed about the presents I’ve got you,” she said as she reached behind her own neck to fasten the locket in place. “This is so unbelievably thoughtful. You’re such an angel.”

“Don’t be daft,” he told her, a pink flush creeping across his cheeks. 

“I mean it. I wasn’t expecting anything so sweet. Here,” she said, pushing another present towards him. “Open the rest of yours, but don’t expect anything as personal as what you got me.”

On top of the boots and the _Potter_ box set, she’d also bought him three new shirts, a _Walking Dead_ graphic novel, a cookbook called _The Veganomicon_ and a set of his favourite Lush soaps. 

Despite her telling him not to, he still felt abashed at the amount of money she had spent on him and hoped he could make it up to her with dinner. That, at least, was something he was always confident with.

And his confidence wasn’t misplaced. When dinner was served, she ate with gusto, making noises that were almost sexual with each and every bite. He couldn’t tear his eyes from her and couldn’t help grinning as she piled her plate high with second helpings of everything.

“What?” she said thickly through a mouthful of pie, as she noticed Peeta watching her.

“Nothing,” he smiled as he picked up his own fork once again. “I just love watching you enjoy food, that’s all.”

“You calling me fat?” she winked at him.

“Gargantuan,” he replied, rolling his eyes and pouring them both more wine. “Although you should save some room for dessert.”

“I thought you said it was crème brûlée.”

“It is.”

She waved her hand dismissively. “That’s essentially custard. And custard is essentially a drink. I don’t need to save room for it.”

“Suit yourself. All the more for me if you can’t finish it.”

“That sounds like a challenge to me,” she laughed, shovelling one last mouthful in, and washing it down with a large glug of wine. “Come on, bring it on! I bet you I’ll manage the lot.”

“As you wish.”

It didn’t take long for Peeta to caramelise the tops of the crème brûlées using a culinary torch, even though Katniss insisted on helping him. And, true to her word, she managed to finish every last mouthful before sitting back contentedly. 

“I may have made a mistake,” she said, rubbing her stomach and slowly sipping at her wine.

“How so?” he asked her.

“I just wasn’t planning on being this full right now. You see, I almost forgot,” she grinned as she set her wine glass back down on the table and leaned in towards him. “I have one last present for you.”

“Katniss— “ he began, beyond mortified that her generosity still hadn’t ceased.

“Shhh. You’ll love this one, I promise. You’ll have to unwrap it just as delicately as you did the others.”

A heartfelt sigh escaped his lips. “You’re too good to me,” he said. “I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve you.”

“Stop it. Do you want it?”

“Sure. Where is it?”

Instead of producing a gift, she straddled his lap and placed his hands on the buttons of her shirt. “Here.”

He raised his eyebrows, but managed to maintain a cool exterior, although internally his heart was racing. “Interesting wrapping paper,” he said as he slowly undid each button. “Really beautifully packaged.”

“Thank you,” she replied, as he gently pushed the material of her shirt away from her shoulders and down her slender arms, exposing her lace bra. He was very happy to see that she was wearing his favourite set; the muted orange of the lace contrasted so perfectly with her olive complexion. 

His fingers ran down one of the straps and along the lace edging that covered one of her breasts. “Is this part of the wrapping paper too?” he asked her.

“That’s up to you,” she responded, draping her arms around his shoulders and playing with the curls at the nape of his neck.

“Well, this bit of wrapping here definitely needs to come off,” he said as he undid the button on her jeans and slowly lowered the zip. He pushed her off his lap for just a moment so that he could remove her jeans, pulling her back on to him the moment she was wearing nothing but her underwear. “This is definitely my favourite present,” he said, his voice low and husky, as he ran his lips along the slope of her neck and shoulders. One hand cupped the front of her breast and gently massaged the supple mound of flesh, pulling the thin scrap of lace down to reveal her dusky nipple underneath. He gently pinched the hardened nub of flesh between his thumb and forefinger, and as he did so, she pressed her lips into his. 

After sucking his bottom lip into her mouth, she gently dragged her teeth along the sensitive flesh before resting her forehead against his. Panting slightly as she tried to catch her breath, she said, “Can I unwrap my present too?”

He nodded as she sat up straight and hooked her fingers underneath his jumper and t-shirt, pulling them both up and over his head in one go. He shivered slightly as the cool air struck, pulling her body back to his to share her warmth.

“I haven’t finished unwrapping it yet,” she giggled, squirming in his embrace. 

“Sorry,” he said, nuzzling into her neck. “I just wanted to enjoy my present a little.”

“Well, I want to enjoy mine too.”

Deftly she ducked out of his arms and made quick work of stripping him of his remaining clothes. As she reached behind her back to undo her bra, Peeta grabbed her wrists and said, “Wait. Leave them on. Please?”

A shy smile spread across her lips as she straddled him once again. His erection pressed against the thin lace of her underwear, and he could feel the heat of her core through the scrap of material. Heart racing, his fingers lightly brushed over the edge of the lace covering her hips, tracing it down to her inner thighs. She gasped as she grasped hold of his shoulders and arched her back, giving him the perfect chance to pull her panties to one side and run his thumb over her sensitive flesh. “Yes…” she whispered as his thumb grazed back and forth over her. He withdrew his hand just for a moment, causing Katniss to whimper in protest, before he sucked two of his fingers into his mouth, coating them with saliva. Looking her in the eyes, he then pushed his fingers into her slightly resisting heat. She was always so tight, and he found himself groaning in anticipation of feeling that tight heat surrounding him. Neither one of them broke eye contact as he pushed deeper into her, and she began rocking her hips in a steady motion, rubbing the hood of her clit against his palm. “Peeta…” His name fell from her lips over and over again in a whispered mantra as she rocked her hips and faster. Peeta reached behind her head and pulled her to his waiting lips before she pulled away from him and said, “I can’t wait another moment. Now, Peeta. Now.”

With Peeta still holding the underneath of her orange lace panties to the side, Katniss lowered herself on to him, both of them clutching on to the other as if they were a tether to life itself. At that moment the wind outside picked up and howled, rattling the windowpanes. Both Katniss and Peeta looked up at the noise. The snow was still coming down thick and fast and had settled against the window in thick drifts. “I think we might get snowed in,” Peeta commented.

“As long as you’re there to keep me warm, I don’t care,” said Katniss as she ducked her head towards him, pressing her lips down the strong lines of his neck. His eyes fluttered closed as she caressed his back, while his hands traced the curve of her waist, holding her steady as he rolled his hips up to meet her. 

“This has definitely been the best Christmas I’ve had,” he said, his voice low and slightly breathless as his fingertips found their way to pulling the material of Katniss’ bra to one side once again. 

“Me too,” she replied, gasping slightly as Peeta rolled her hardened nipple between his fingers.

“And this is my favourite present,” he chuckled, grasping her shoulders and pulling her down further on to him. Katniss gasped as his cock filled her, and as the coarse, dark blonde hair gently scratched her sensitive flesh she gripped on to him even tighter, writhing above him. “Oh, Katniss,” he moaned, as her wanton movements edged him closer. Her mouth found his, sucking his bottom lip in and nibbling along the flesh, before her tongue invaded his mouth and they fought a furious tango, each desperate to dominate the other’s kiss.

Within seconds, an unbearable pressure had built up within him; he tried to hold back, not wanting this to be over so soon, but his body took over, and as he thrust upwards into her hard and fast, that pressure was replaced with a pleasure so intense that his hold on Katniss became almost painful. He thrust several more times into her with shuddering movements before his face fell against her shoulder as he tried to catch his breath, a feeling of shame washing over him. “I’m so sorry,” he said between gasps.

“For what?” she said, playing with the curls at the nape of his neck.

“You made me come too soon,” he said, feeling a hot flush creeping over his cheeks. “I’m not good enough.”

“Oh, shush.”

“But—“

“No buts. You’d know if you weren’t satisfying me.”

“Katniss—“

“Peeta, stop. Or I’ll begin to think that you’re determined to find something wrong with today just to prove some ridiculous and unnecessary point.” She slowly climbed off of him and readjusted her underwear as she did so, and Peeta felt a sickening, clawing feeling in the pit of his stomach. Was she right? Was he, even unintentionally, trying to sabotage his own happiness today? He watched her pick up her discarded clothing, and as she began to redress herself he crossed his arms over his chest, clutching himself. As she pulled her jeans back up, she caught his eye. “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked him.

Without realising he was doing it, he found himself nodding and grabbing his own clothes, throwing them on as quickly as he could.

“Can we have some of this?” Katniss asked, indicating the large pan of mulled wine sitting on the stovetop. He nodded and moved to stand in front of the stove but Katniss blocked his way. “Go sit down, I think I can just about handle heating this up.”

In silence, he trudged through to his living room and collapsed on to his couch, kicking his feet up over the armrest and staring up at the ceiling. Within seconds, Zippy had jumped up and landed on his stomach, and began to knead him over and over, purring loudly all the time. He settled down and curled into a tight ball on Peeta’s chest just as Katniss came through from the kitchen, carrying two steaming mugs of wine. She set one down on the floor next to him, then said, “Scoot up,” indicating that she wanted to sit down with him. He lifted his legs without disturbing Zippy, and as soon as Katniss sat down beside him, he stretched his legs back out over her lap. They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, Katniss sipping at her mug of wine and Peeta absent-mindedly stroking Zippy, before Katniss spoke up. “What’s going on up there, Peeta?”

He couldn’t look at her, and he struggled to form a coherent thought. “I told you,” he said eventually. “I’m not good at this time of year.”

“I know you said that,” she replied. “Is it because of your accident? Because of Jenn?”

He nodded. “I guess they’re both part of it.”

“Part of it? What else is there?”

“I dunno, Katniss, it’s not important,” he replied, already feeling an oppressive heat settle over him, suddenly unsure if he really wanted to talk. 

“Tell me.”

“You’ll probably read way more into it than you need to.”

“Try me,” she said.

He took a deep breath and sat up, dislodging Zippy in the process, so that he could pick up the still-hot mug of mulled wine and take a calming sip. “I remember Christmas one year when I was little. Mum and Dad were arguing. I don’t know what about, but I remember it was worse than I’d ever heard them argue. A couple of days later, Mum was gone.” He shrugged and drank some more wine.

“Your mum left at Christmas?”

He nodded, staring into the depths of the deep sanguine liquid. “Dad too.” He could hear Katniss’ sharp intake of breath as she processed the information. “He died about a week before Christmas Day.”

“And you fell out with your brothers not long after that?”

He nodded once again, not wanting to make eye contact with her. “I told you that you’d read too much into it.”

“I’m hardly reading too much into it, Peeta,” she snorted. “It pretty much explains everything.” She was absently stroking and squeezing his thighs. “So has it always been like this?”

He paused before answering thoughtfully. “No. I mean, I coped but…. It got worse, when…” Swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat, he looked at the lower half of his left leg, noticing that Katniss own gaze had fallen there too.

“Did it hurt?” she blurted out, and Peeta couldn’t help but laugh at the innocence of her question.

“Yeah,” he replied. “Yeah, it hurt. Imagine half a tonne of horse weight concentrated in a single hoof landing on you. It doesn’t feel pleasant.” What memories he had of that day swam sickeningly in front of his vision for a moment. Much of the incident had been forgotten, and he’d filled in the blanks with what his friends had told him. But the physical pain was nothing compared to the emotional pain he’d been left in as a result. That was what had hurt the most. And that had been the nail in the coffin as far as Christmas was concerned. “I’m sorry, Katniss. I shouldn’t have involved you in this—“ he looked around, desperately searching for the right word. “—this train wreck of a holiday.”

“It’s not a train wreck,” she said soothingly. “And…. Please don’t take this the wrong way… but have you ever thought of talking to someone?”

“So they can tell me that all my neuroses stem from abandonment issues? I don’t need some fucking quack telling me what I already know.”

“Peeta, I just want you to be happy. Whatever it takes.”

“And I am, generally. Being near you helps.” He flashed her a half smile as he sipped at his mulled wine, pulling a face at how cool it was rapidly becoming. 

“Promise me something, Peeta,” she said, and her voice was so full of concern that he couldn’t help but agree before she even told him what she wanted of him. “Promise me that if things start to seem dark that you’ll talk to me. I don’t care if that means that you have to call me at four in the morning, if you need to do it, you call me.”

“Katniss,” he said, and he couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re talking like I’m gonna top myself.”

“Don’t laugh at me worrying, ok? When you spoke to Jenn, I overheard you saying that in the past you'd had.... dark thoughts, and I can’t deal with that.”

“That was years ago, Katniss.”

“Did you ever act on them?”

“No. Not really.”

“Not really? What’s that supposed to mean?"

“I mean, I thought about it. I got really drunk once and lined up a load of pills. But I don’t know if I was going to take them or not. I don’t think I would have done. Finn had a spare key at the time, and he found me and decked me one so I never got the chance.”

She was silent for a moment then spoke in a tremulous voice, “After my dad died, my mum had those thoughts too. I was fourteen when I came home from school and found mum slumped over the kitchen table with an empty box of paracetamol and a bottle of vodka smashed on the floor beside her.” 

“Jesus,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

“I’m not surprised Finn hit you. It’s the worst thing in the world, finding someone you care about in that way. So please, promise me you’d call.”

“Katniss, I’m not—“

“Just… just promise me.”

“Ok, ok, I promise!” He downed the remainder of his almost cold wine. “And I really am sorry if this Christmas hasn’t been what you hoped it would.”

“Peeta, I’ve been with you. That alone made it perfect. You know I love you?”

He nodded, but couldn’t look at her. “I love you, too.”

“And is being with me enough for you?”

“Of course it is.”

“Then know that it’s enough for me too.”

At long last, he looked up into her eyes, and she seemed so sincere that his heart melted. “Thanks. For, y’know, putting up with me. Come here?” He held his arms out to her, releasing her from under his legs so that she could lie down beside him. “So, what would you usually do on a Christmas evening like this?”

“Well, I wouldn’t usually be snuggled down with the man I love,” she responded. “But you can’t beat getting under a warm blanket and watching a film.”

“Sounds perfect,” he smiled, holding on to her even tighter. “Can we just start today again from now? I’d really like that.”

“If it makes you happy, my angel, then sure.”

“It would.” He kissed the top of her head. “It really would. Merry Christmas, Katniss.”

Their lips found each other, a gentle ghosting kiss that sent pleasurable shivers down his spine. A sparkle lit up her grey eyes as she smiled and said, “Merry Christmas to you too, my angel.”


	6. Make Us Glow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you to Court81981 for her fabulous beta work, and making everything I write readable. You're a star, lady!
> 
> So... be prepared for a January smut-fest :)
> 
> I try to respond to all comments, and love to chat, so please let me know what you think. And I'm on tumblr as alatarielgildaen dot tumblr dot com, so feel free to pop on by and say hello!

## January

It was purely by accident that he found her secret stash. They had been watching _Die Hard_ , in Peeta's eyes the perfect antithesis to the majority of saccharine sweet Christmas films, while snuggled up together under a blanket in Katniss' flat. Outside, the icy January wind howled against the window panes, another perfect contrast to the warmth and colour inside. Katniss had asked Peeta to help her take down the Christmas decorations the following day, and he was only too happy to oblige, but for now they remained. Everywhere red and gold reflected the pinpricks of luminescence from the hanging fairy lights and gave the impression of the room being on fire.

Katniss' interest in the film was rapidly waning. Instead of focusing on John McClane and his battle of wits against Hans Gruber, her interested was being piqued by a couple of fingernails that she was trimming with her teeth.

"Katniss, you're missing it," complained Peeta.

"No, I'm still watching it."

"Oh really, what just happened then?"

"Alan Rickman called in the FBI."

Peeta looked at her in utter disbelief. "What?"

She gestured at the screen with her free hand, continuing to bite and nibble at the fingernails of her other. "Alan Rickman called in the FBI."

"Firstly, it's not Alan Rickman— "

"Yes, it bloody is!"

"Ok, I know the _actor_ is, but do you even have a clue what character he's playing? And no, he didn't just call in the FBI!"

"He did!"

"No, Katniss. It was all part of his master plan. He _knew_ they'd come but he didn't call them."

"Well, whatever, he mentioned them."

Peeta decided to drop it. For the most part it had become pretty clear that one thing they couldn't really agree on was choice of film, but Peeta was much better at tolerating Katniss' choices than she was his. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her tear a strip of nail away with her teeth and leave it on the armrest of the sofa. "That's a really disgusting habit, you know."

"Says the man who eats Marmite straight from the jar."

"There's nothing wrong with that."

"There's _everything_ wrong with that."

"Says the girl who'd rather self-cannibalise her nails than cut them."

"It's not that I'd _rather_ bite them off," she said, as she examined the nail on her left forefinger. "It's more that I'm really warm and comfortable, and my nail scissors are in my room."

He watched the screen for a few moments longer before sighing. She'd won this round. "You want me to get them for you?"

"Would you do that for me?"

A gentle kiss on the top of her head was the first answer he gave her. "I'd do _anything_ for you."

"Thanks, angel."

One last kiss, and he left the warmth and comfort of the blanket and sofa behind, and jogged down the hall to her room. "Where are they?" he called through to her.

"Bedside cabinet," she replied.

Nothing in her room qualified as what he would have called a 'cabinet,' and so he tried the only likely looking piece of furniture: a small chest of drawers next to her bed, with two drawers and a built-in recess. The scissors weren't sat on top in plain view, and neither were they in the hollowed-out recess. He pulled open the bottom drawer, and what he found made his eyes pop out.

A plethora of different shaped, sized, and coloured vibrators met his eyes, ranging from a tiny bullet-shaped one that looked no bigger than a Vicks inhaler, right up to a clear behemoth, filled with a double helix of sturdy looking metal beads, with a smaller stimulator at the front, and a control panel with just two buttons set in to the base. Seeing it nestling in Katniss' bedside drawer felt like a punch to the stomach. Did she ever compare his performance to this monster? There was no way he could compete with anything like that….

"Jesus," he whispered as he picked the thing up. It was far weightier than he expected. He turned it over in his hands a few times, and as he did, he accidentally hit a button on the control panel. The stimulator at the front buzzed in to life, and he very nearly dropped it. "Shit," he hissed under his breath, pressing a button at random to try and turn the thing off. The stimulator buzzed even faster. "Oh, fuck…." He tried the other button, and the metal balls inside the shaft began to rotate noisily.

"Are you ok in there?" Katniss' voice drifted through from the lounge.

"Yup," he called back, pressing the second button again. The helix rotated the other way, but he was unable to turn the blasted thing off.

"Are you sure?" she said, and Peeta jumped out of his skin. She'd pulled her usual trick of entering a room without making a sound.

Her eyes went from him, to her open drawer, to the buzzing and pulsating vibrator in his hands. "It's not what it looks like," he said desperately as she raised an eyebrow at him.

"Really?" she replied, her eyebrows creeping ever higher up her face.

The vibrator continued to throb and undulate noisily in his hand. "Well, maybe it's a bit what it looks like. But I swear, I wasn't prying."

"Sure."

"I opened the wrong drawer and…." With no clear idea of how to finish the sentence, he looked down at the toy in his hands and began to press the two buttons repeatedly to try and turn it off again. The stimulator just seemed to cycle through various speeds while the shaft span one way, then back the other way again. He could feel his face getting redder and redder with each passing second.

"Hold them both down for a couple of seconds," she offered helpfully, trying to hide her smirk, but revelling in his discomfort. The relief emanating from him as he finally managed to turn it off was palpable. She walked forward and opened a built-in door in the wall next to her bed that revealed a shelved cupboard loaded with cosmetics, shampoos, body moisturisers and feminine care products. Reaching inside, she immediately found the manicure set she had sent Peeta in to retrieve.

"That's a cupboard, Katniss. Not a cabinet."

"Ok. And that—" she said, pointing at her bedside drawers, "—is a chest of drawers. Also not a cabinet."

"Got you," he said, gesturing with the vibrator still in his hand, hurriedly dropping it back in the drawer when he realised what he was doing. "That's um.….quite a collection."

"Thanks," she replied, and it was obvious that she was enjoying his discomfort far too much. Grinning widely, she stepped a little closer to him. "I hope I haven't shocked you."

"No," he said, and was mortified to hear how high-pitched his voice sounded, like a teenage boy whose voice was breaking.

"Really?" she asked, taking his hands in her own and pulling him down to sit on the bed with her.

He didn't put up any protest as she encouraged him to lie back on the bed, but he couldn't take his eyes off the drawer. "Maybe a little," he confirmed. "I guess I'm just a bit…. vanilla? I hope you don't end up getting bored with me."

"God, no," she replied. "And I'm sure you're not _that_ vanilla. Come on, you've seen my secret shame. Haven't you ever done anything outrageous? You must have some dirty secrets you're hiding."

"No," he replied, a little too quickly and forcefully.

"Well, that's a definite yes if ever I heard one."

"No," he repeated, although he could feel his face burning with the lie.

"Oh come on, you've got to tell me now. Otherwise I'll probably concoct an imaginary scenario that would be way worse than the truth."

"No," he reasoned, "the truth is probably worse." He pushed his hair back off his face and took a deep breath. "But it only happened once. Never again." The shame was apparent in every molecule of his body, and he had no idea why he was agreeing to confess this to Katniss. Probably because he had learned that he simply couldn't ever say no to her, no matter what the request. "It was about a year ago. I…. ummm…. I visited a prostitute. But nothing happened," he added at the end.

"Nothing happened?"

"No, I swear, I couldn't go through with it." A long, heartfelt sigh escaped his lips, and he rested his head in his hands as he began to speak. "It was after Christmas, just before the New Year, and, well, you know Christmas is pretty hard for me, and Finn and Annie had gone away on holiday, and there was just _no one_. I called everyone I knew, just to see if anyone could meet up, go for a drink, _anything_ , but everyone was busy. And it had been over a week since I'd had any interaction with another human, and I was just so fucking _bored_ of… of me….. of my own touch…. And I just…. I needed someone to touch me. Anyone. It was all I could think about. It had got to the stage where I'd be looking up online porn, and getting insanely turned on by what I was seeing, but… I just couldn't get myself off. And then I'd be ashamed of even trying, and of looking at these ridiculously graphic images and videos. It had been two years since I'd been with anyone, and…. "

He shook his head to himself, unsure of what he was trying to say. Every ounce of moisture had evaporated from his mouth, and when he swallowed, he experienced the sensation of sandpaper grating his oesophagus. "It was two years since I'd woken up in hospital, and I needed to get out of the house, I felt so trapped. And I got in the car, and I just started to drive and…. I hadn't gone out with the intention of picking someone up, I swear I hadn't, but I saw this girl waiting on the street, and it occurred to me what she was doing, and I…. I don't know why I did it, but I stopped the car, and I asked her how much. A hundred quid for sex, fifty for a blowjob, twenty for a hand job. I had thirty quid on me and…. I agreed."

His head fell back against the headboard as he stared up at the ceiling. He wasn't sure whether he should be encouraged by Katniss' utter silence, or take it as a sign that he should stop but now that he had started his confession, it was like a floodgate, and he had to get everything out. This was something he'd never told anyone before. "She told me to park around the corner, get out of my car, and wait for her. So I did. And a few minutes later, she appeared. First things first, she demanded the money up front, so I gave her the twenty. She said she knew where we could go, and I followed her. And I realised we were being followed by this fucking giant of a skinhead. I pointed him out to her, and she told me not to worry about him, he'd just make sure we weren't disturbed. So she led me down this alleyway, and it suddenly struck me what I was doing and I panicked. She started to undo my trousers and I felt too exposed, I felt mortified at myself, and to top it all off it was fucking _freezing_ outside, it was like… I don't know, it was like stepping out of yourself and I just thought, _'What the fuck are you doing?_ ' And I apologised for wasting her time. And that should have been the end of it, but she must have realised I was some fucking sap, because she used those exact words against me. Said that I _had_ wasted her time, and I needed to pay her. I pointed out that I already had and that I wasn't expecting it back, but she demanded another twenty off me. And of course I only had ten, which I offered her anyway because I didn't want any trouble. She snatched it out of my hand, but she said it wasn't good enough, so she called over her skinhead, and I was absolutely shitting it by this point, and together they marched me to the nearest cashpoint. Demanded another fifty off me. And believe me, when you've got a six-foot-six brick shithouse called fucking _Brutus_ , of all things, cracking his knuckles and demanding you give him fifty quid, you fucking do it. So that's it. My biggest shame. I paid eighty quid for a wank I didn't even get to have."

The silence between them stretched on for what felt like years before Katniss put her hand over her mouth and began to laugh.

"You laughing at me?"

"No, Peeta," she said, "I'm laughing with you. Not at you. Big difference."

"I need to be laughing, too, for you to be laughing with me," he reminded her, and she snorted even louder. "Stop it!" he said, and despite himself he felt the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. "I said stop," and this time there was no hiding it, he was laughing along with her.

"I'm sorry," she said, wiping a tear away from the corner of her eye, "but you have to admit, it's funny."

"It wasn't at the time," he protested. "I thought it was going to be the end of me."

Finally she managed to get herself back under control, and resting her cheek against his chest while slowly drawing her fingers over the material of his shirt covering his stomach, she said, "So you've never played with any toys?"

"Oh yeah, I've played with toys. I had a Castle Greyskull when I was a kid that I loved, and all the He-Man figures to go with it."

"You know what I mean, Peeta."

He paused awkwardly before speaking. "Yeah, I know what you mean. And no, I've not ever used anything like that. Jesus, until ten minutes ago I'd never even seen one in the flesh."

"You know they do toys for men, too?"

"Ok," he said slowly, not sure if he was entirely happy about where the conversation was going.

"Might be fun to get something for us to use together," she added, lifting his shirt up and gently flitting her fingers over the flesh of his abdomen, causing a shiver to run through him.

"I'm not shoving anything up my arse, Katniss. Not even for you."

"You wouldn't have to," she laughed. "You'll see."

_________________________________

Displaying a stubborn resolution, Katniss refused to elaborate any further on what she had in mind until the following day. She insisted on taking a trip into Central, getting off at Tottenham Court Road, and leading him down Oxford Street, stopping outside a shop called Harmony.

Peeta looked around desperately. Oxford Street was, as always, overcrowded, with people bustling and jostling into them as they made their way about their daily lives. But even though they were all nameless strangers, he didn't want any of them to see him stood outside a sex shop, or worse, going in to one. He was almost grateful when Katniss took the lead again and pulled him inside. However, his discomfort only grew as he looked around. It wasn't exactly the kind of environment he felt comfortable in. On top of the disgust at all the leather on display, being surrounded by so many images of naked men with impossibly huge cocks did very little to combat his rising nerves.

It didn't help that Katniss seemed to know exactly where to go. "You um… you seem really familiar with this place," Peeta managed to say eventually, keeping his eyes resolutely on his feet.

"You'll have to thank Jo for that," Katniss replied. "It's all her fault. She introduced me to this sordid world, and I'm afraid to say it's pretty addictive. Here we go."

They had reached their destination. Peeta looked up and immediately felt his cheeks burning a deep scarlet. Katniss was turning something over in her hands that, at first glance, looked like an oversized plastic torch. Only there wasn't a light at the wider end. Set into the plastic was a tight, puckered hole, into which Katniss had deeply plunged two fingers. "It's supposed to feel like anal, apparently," she said rather nonchalantly as she set the thing back down, picking up a second one that was even more conspicuous with a highly realistic looking vagina set in to it.

"Katniss…" he said desperately, looking around to check that no one was watching them as Katniss delicately ran her fingers over the lips before immersing her fingers deep inside.

"Have a feel of that," she said, holding the object out towards him.

"Oh god, do I have to?"

"Go on," she said with a giggle. "It won't bite."

"No, but it looks like it might wink, and that could be even worse."

"Just touch it!"

He tentatively stretched his hand out as Katniss thrust the torch-like object towards him. His fingers brushed over the surface, which was strangely soft, pliable and warm, and not at all like he had been expecting it to feel. It felt almost life-like and he immediately withdrew his hand in shock. "What the fuck is that?"

"It's a masturbation aid," she replied matter-of-factly.

"I already have one of those," he said, holding up his right hand. "And it's served me pretty well the last fifteen or so years."

"I bet your hand can't do what one of these could."

"And I bet that thing won't do what you can."

"It's not supposed to be the same," she explained patiently. "Just…. different. New."

Allowing his gaze to lift from his shoes for a moment, he looked along the shelf at the rows of these aids, each with a different sized and shaped vagina crafted into the end, some with tight little arse holes, some with open mouths. He swallowed thickly, trying desperately to hide the deep sense of mortification he felt. "I really don't like the idea of sticking my John Thomas in a plastic fanny. Sorry if that makes me weird."

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable, Peeta. But lots of couples have toys they use together. Keeps things interesting."

A cold shiver ran down his spine at her words; she'd proclaimed that she wasn't going to get bored of him, but was this evidence to the contrary? Is that why Jenn had embarked on that affair? Wasn't he satisfying her? He wasn't willing to take that risk with Katniss. "This would make you happy, would it?"

"It'd certainly be a massive turn on," she said, slipping her hand into the back pocket of his jeans and giving him a little squeeze. A jolt of electricity ran through him at both her touch and her words, causing his cock to twitch a little in anticipation. If this was what she wanted, he'd do it for her.

Trying his utmost to ignore the embarrassment he felt, he picked up one of the torch-like objects, and read the packaging.

_'Modelled on alt pornstar Stoya's tight pussy, the Destroya Fleshlight provides 360 degrees of piercing pleasure and unmatched bliss.'_

He put it straight back on the shelf, saying, "God, no. I'm not having anything called a _Destroya_ coming anywhere near my dick, thanks."

"Suit yourself. What about this?" she said, handing him another, with a wicked grin on her face. Like before, this had apparently been modelled on a real-life porn star, and this one had been named _The Barracuda_. With a wince, he shook his head and put it back. All of them seemed to be similarly named: _Torrid, Vortex, Dragon, Tornado…_

"Is there nothing that doesn't sound like it's going to hurt?" he asked, causing Katniss to burst into a fit of giggles.

"Ooh, what about this one?" she asked, regaining her composure and picking yet another toy from the shelf. "Fleshlight Ice Crystal. At least it doesn't sound painful."

It differed from the others in that the outer casing, as well as the soft inner sleeve, were both made from a translucent material that, according to the packaging, would allow them to 'watch the action.' It was then that he noticed the price on the shelf edging. "Sixty quid?" he hissed. "It's a bit expensive, isn't it?"

"You're the one who paid eighty quid for a non-existent wank," she responded with a wink.

"Keep it down," he said desperately, looking around to make sure no one had overheard them. He could feel the heat radiating from his face as he grew redder and redder. Either way, whether they bought the damn thing or not, it had gotten to the stage where he just wanted to get out of this shop and put an end to the humiliation he felt. And he knew Katniss wasn't going to be the one to back down. "Fine," he said at last. "If we get this thing can we just go? Please?"

A mischievous gleam appeared in her eye as she kissed him. "Sure thing, angel. You won't regret it, I promise. Love you."

After paying for it and being persuaded at the tills to part with even more money (as apparently lubricant was 'a must'), and being advised to place it in warm water for ten minutes before use for an even better experience, Peeta was desperate to leave. This world was not one he'd experienced before, and he felt so incredibly out of place and almost relieved to be back in the hustle and bustle of Oxford Street.

\-----------------------------

As soon as they got back to Katniss' flat, she pounced on him, her fingers working their way into his curls and holding him steady as she assaulted his mouth with her tongue over and over again. Her hand slid down to cup the bulge forming at the front of his jeans, and he couldn't stop the quiet moans as she gently squeezed and massaged him, nor the groan of disappointment as she abruptly pulled away from him.

"I'm gonna get this ready," she said, indicating their new toy. She ducked away into the bathroom, and Peeta could hear her running the taps, clearly doing as the shop assistant had advised. Leaning back against the wall in Katniss' hallway, he had to take several deep, steading breaths while he waited for her. After a minute or two she re-emerged and immediately entwined herself in Peeta's arms once again, walking backwards towards her room while continuing to kiss him.

There could be no denying that on top of his arousal, he was feeling a little apprehensive as she led him into her bedroom. She wasted no time in starting to strip him, pulling his jumper over his head and practically tearing his shirt open, and he shuddered slightly as the cold of her fingertips brushed over his stomach. "You ok?" she whispered, before leaning into him, pressing her lips along his clavicle and reaching up to lick along his jaw line. His mouth set into a firm line, but he didn't trust himself to speak and nodded tightly instead. "Relax." Her voice was like melted chocolate, sweet and smooth, and her head dipped lower so she could take one of his nipples into his mouth. The dual sensation of her hot tongue swirling over him and her teeth gently grazing his flesh left him completely breathless, causing his already hard cock to strain uncomfortably against the tight material of his jeans.

Katniss gently pushed against him, walking him backwards until he reached the edge of her bed. Keeping her eyes firmly on his, she reached down and undid the button fly on his jeans, and he breathed a small sigh of relief as the pressure against him was released. She pulled his jeans down over his hips, encouraging him to step out of them. Stepping closer to him, she stroked her palm over his erection, sending a spasm of anticipatory pleasure jolting through him.

"Sit down," she instructed him, as she began to slowly peel away her layers of clothing, until she was down to her underwear. Peeta let out a slow, long exhalation of breath as he admired her exquisite form.

He didn't get much of a chance to admire her before she was straddling him, cupping his face in her hands and devouring him with kisses. He could have happily stayed this way, but he knew she had other plans. She pulled away from him, slightly breathless, as a languid smile spread across her face. "Are you ready?"

Not really, if he was being entirely truthful with himself, but he swallowed his nerves and nodded. She grinned and climbed off him before opening her bedside drawer. "Pick something out for me," she said with a wink. "I'll get yours."

His heart was racing so fast and hard that he could feel it pounding in his ears as he looked at her array of toys. With absolutely no idea what he was really looking for, he started to pick through them. So many of them looked far too intimidating, too big, too... _advanced_. A curved, pink one caught his eye. It wasn't overly large, but the shape of it confused him. Holding it up on its side, it vaguely resembled the profile of the _Starship Enterprise_ , only curvier. He turned it over in his hands a couple of times before picking up another confusing item. This one was small, just a few inches long and U-shaped, with a series of smooth ridges on the inside of the 'U'. Katniss re-entered the room just as he was running his finger along the ridges. "Oooh, which one are you going for?"

"Umm…" he floundered, unsure of what either item was supposed to do.

She smiled in clear understanding of his dilemma. "I think you'll like this one more," she said, indicating the U-shaped toy, while putting the _Enterprise_ back in the drawer. "And I've never had the chance to use it before. Not as it's supposed to be used at least. And this is ready to go," she said, while squeezing a generous amount of cherry-flavoured lube into the Fleshlight. She set it down on top of the bedside drawers next to the other toy that had been left out before telling him to lie back on the bed. As soon as he did as she asked, she clambered on to the bed next to him, sliding her fingers under the waistband of his boxer briefs and pulling them down over his hips. Out of nerves, his erection had all but vanished. She trailed a series of kisses down his torso, her fingertips gently fluttering over his sensitive flesh until his arousal returned. Once she was satisfied, she picked up the Fleshlight, and, taking Peeta's length in one of her hands, she lowered the tight opening over him.

"Holy shit," he choked out involuntarily. He had never felt anything quite like it. The material inside was soft, warm and wet, and each of the ridges inside massaged him exquisitely as he pushed through. Every last feeling of apprehension he'd had evaporated in an instant, and his hands fisted the sheets in tight balls. She slowly moved it up and down over him, each of the textured bumps and ridges inside bringing him nothing but pleasure.

"Oh god, seeing you inside this…. You look so damn hot fucking it."

He forced his eyes open to watch her. One arm was draped over his stomach while she held the Fleshlight in the other, bringing it down over his cock in a slight twisting motion. The textures changed the further down the shaft he went, and he suddenly wanted to experience it all. He thrust his hips up higher to meet her, unable to control the groans escaping his lips as the shaft became tighter, a series of soft bumps surrounding and massaging every millimetre of his head.

As she continued to pleasure him, he wanted to do the same for her. Her hair cascaded down over her shoulders and he ran his fingers through it, exposing the elegant and slender lines of her neck. He allowed his touch to drop lower, gliding over the curve of her waist. He paused to run his hand over her backside for a moment, squeezing the soft flesh, before he encouraged her to open her legs to him. Sliding his fingers over the slick, soft flesh between her legs, he sought out her clit, gently circling the sensitive nub of flesh in time to his own upwardly thrusting hips.

He was getting close to the edge far too soon; he didn't want this to ever end, but there was no way he was going to last much longer. There were simply too many sensations. "Are you close, angel?" she whispered.

"Uh-huh," he grunted, unable to form coherent words.

"Don't hate me," she said, and she gently pulled the sleeve off him.

"Wha—? What are you doing?" he gasped, almost entirely breathless.

"Have you ever tried edging?"

"No," he said in almost a whimper as the intensity of the waves of pleasure began to subside.

"I think you'll thank me, in the long run. Trust me."

"What are you going to do?"

She leant over him, and ran her tongue over his trembling bottom lip. "I need you to be honest and tell me when you're getting close each time. And tell me when you can't take any more. And I'll decide if you can."

"You love being in control, huh?"

"I do, Peeta. I really do."

He nodded as his breathing and heart rate started to return to normal. "When do I get to pleasure you?"

"When I say so."

He felt filled with equal parts nerves and trepidation. He hadn't lied when he told Katniss how vanilla he was. It wasn't that he hadn't _thought_ about experimenting sexually. But as a young man, managing to get laid at all was enough. Then after getting with Jenn, they had settled down into an easy routine where sex was always enjoyable, but nothing ever really changed. And then, of course, after she left him, there were no opportunities at all, until he met Katniss….

The feeling of her kisses trailing down his body wiped all other thoughts from his mind. As usual, she took longer when passing over his tattoo, spending extra time laving his skin with her tongue before moving further down his body. She paused when she reached his cock, her pupils dilating hungrily before she lowered the Fleshlight over him once more.

Once again, it took all of Peeta's willpower to keep his eyes open and watch what she was doing, but when she dipped her head and started to kiss and lick the base of his cock and balls, it became too much for him. The brief sight he had of his cock filling the Fleshlight while Katniss' tongue flickered over him would— he was certain—remain with him for the rest of his life.

"Fuck, Katniss…" he hissed, as his hands found her head and wound their way into her hair. He wanted to touch her too, to make her feel as wanted, as _needed_ , as she did to him, but in their current position that was an impossibility. "Katniss," he gasped just as she pushed his cock right down to the tighter section that massaged his head in a way he could only have imagined before, "Katniss, please, I want…. I want to touch you. Please…."

"Next time, ok?"

"Next time?"

"Uh-huh. Remember, tell me when you're close, ok?" She dipped her head back down to place a kiss at the base of his cock while her free hand sought out and stroked along his perineum.

The effect on him was instant. His whole body shuddered with the effort of maintaining control, while his hands gripped her hair even tighter. "Shit, Katniss, I'm close," he cried out, groaning in bitter frustration as she immediately ceased her sensual assault on him. He relinquished his grip on her hair and rubbed his hands over his face, pressing the heels into his eyes for a moment while his breathing slowly returned to normal.

The ache in his cock was becoming almost unbearable, and he had no idea how long she planned to keep teasing him for. It was becoming increasingly difficult to gather his thoughts coherently, and it took him entirely by surprise when he felt her lips press into his. "I'm so turned on right now," she whispered in his ear. "I need your mouth on me."

He barely had time to nod before he felt her weight shift on top of him. Opening his eyes for a moment, he moaned her name at what he saw. She was facing away from him, her legs on either side of his head, and she was lowering her mouth to his waiting cock. "Oh, fuck, Katniss…." He reached up and placed his hands over the curve of her backside, pulling her towards his own mouth. His tongue ran along her slick folds, and at the same moment she wrapped her hand around the base of his cock and covered him with her lips.

Bliss. Nothing else in the world mattered or even existed outside of the two of them. Feeling her lips and her tongue gliding over him was such a welcome relief from the intensity of the Fleshlight, and nothing, _nothing_ made him happier—or harder— than pleasing her.

Her hips rolled and undulated over him, and in response, he held her even tighter, thrusting his tongue deep inside her, sucking her clit into his mouth. She moaned in response to his ministrations, the hum of her voice sending vibrations deep through his cock and sending him ever closer to the brink once again. She pulled away from him for a moment and whispered, "Oh, Peeta, I'm going to come." Gripping her hips even tighter, he darted his tongue back and forth over the sensitive nub of flesh, holding on and not stopping as her body seized up on top of him. He thrust his own hips upwards, desperate to make contact with her again, as the pressure inside him almost reached its peak. It wouldn't take much to send him spiralling over the edge right now, if he could just find the warmth and wetness of her mouth...

But no. She was denying him yet again… His head fell back against the pillow as she climbed off him, and, satiated, she rested her head against his shoulder.

"How are you doing, angel?" she said gently, as her breathing slowly returned to normal.

How to answer that? He had never been more turned on in his entire life, but the constant denial was taking its toll. Running his hands over his face and pushing his hair back off his sweating forehead, he said, "I don't even know. I can't…. think anymore." The ache in his balls was becoming utterly unbearable, and his heart was fluttering almost painfully fast. "Please, Katniss… I need…"

"I think you can take one more."

"I can't, Katniss. I really can't."

"Yes, you can," she said firmly, and she silenced his protests with a kiss, staying locked to his lips until his heart rate began to return to normal.

"Katniss," he whimpered, "please…."

"You ready?" she asked. Without waiting for an answer she snatched up the Fleshlight once again, squeezing more lube inside.

Knowing what was coming, knowing how good it was going to feel, and that Katniss was going to snatch release away from him did little to ease his anxiety. If anything it merely prolonged his torment, as he desperately fought against allowing himself to enjoy the sensations too much.

But he couldn't fight against it forever. As Katniss brought the Fleshlight down over him again and again, gently twisting and turning it over his hardened cock, he soon felt the pressure in his balls begin to mount once more. He determined not to tell Katniss this time; he had to come, he simply had to. His breathing soon started to hitch in his throat and he fisted the sheets even tighter. His eyes screwed tightly shut, he bit down hard on his bottom lip and concentrated with all his might on not giving out any more signals. He figured she'd be cross with him for ruining whatever she had in store for him but at that moment he no longer cared.

"I think that's enough of that," Katniss said suddenly, abruptly pulling the Fleshlight away from him. In response he rolled over on to his side and punched the pillow in frustration. "You weren't going to tell me, were you?"

Even if he was able to articulate a proper answer, he wouldn't want to tell her the truth. "I…. can't…. Katniss, please…..."

"I know, angel," she replied, gently stroking a few stray curls away from his forehead. "Get your breath back and I promise that it'll be worth it." She pulled him on to his back and rested her head against his shoulder, and ran her fingers up down his abdomen, sending shivers down his spine. Her touch felt almost painful as his senses were so heightened, but he held on to her and grit his teeth against the almost agonizing bliss. "You've done so well, Peeta," she cooed at long last, leaning up on her elbow as a languid smile spread across her face. "I think you're ready to help me with my toy."

"Katniss, please, no more teasing," he begged. He pushed his sweat-drenched hair off from his forehead. Everything was aching, he couldn't tell reality from fiction, and he couldn't remember a time where he didn't feel this desperate need for release….

He watched through half-closed lids as she picked up the small U-shaped vibrator and twisted one end of it. Immediately it sprang to life, buzzing and pulsating in her hand.

"Help me, Peeta."

At that moment, he was no longer in control of himself. Katniss was his entire world, and any request she made he had no choice but to fulfil. "What do I do?" he asked her.

"Here," she said, placing the already vibrating toy in his hands. She showed him how to gently open the 'U' shape up and place one end of it at her entrance. "Push this into me." He did as she asked, and the ridged side of the toy was pressed against her clit. As soon as the toy was in place her breathing became shallow. "Now you too, Peeta. I need you inside me, too."

Every single nerve in his body was on fire as he positioned himself over her. The vibe resting against her clit was already causing her to squirm slightly under him, and he focused on her breasts, heaving up and down with every fast breath she took. Unsure of exactly how it would work 'sharing' Katniss with the vibrator, he pushed into her entrance.

Immediately his breath was taken from him. The tiny vibe resting against her clit sent escalating pulses to the base of his cock, and with every single thrust he could feel the smooth edge of the internal part of the vibe catching on the ridge of his head.

"Katniss," he gasped, his breathing ragged, "please tell me you're not going to deny me again. I'm not going to be able to stop."

"It's ok," she whispered back to him, wrapping her legs around him and pulling him even further into her. "You can let go, Peeta."

It really wasn't going to take much for him, but he was determined that Katniss would come first. Every single ounce of his mental energy was focused on keeping his own orgasm at bay. He was shaking with the effort; sweat was pouring from his forehead and dripping from the end of his nose as he moved slowly within her.

"Please, Katniss," he said, his voice barely above a whimper, "please come soon."

Almost as soon as he spoke, her arms pulled his head towards her own, and she pressed her lips forcefully into his. He opened his mouth to her as her body tensed underneath him, and he swallowed her moans and cries as she tensed and shook under his weight.

He couldn't hold back for another second. He'd felt nothing but intense pressure for what felt like hours, but as soon as he felt Katniss' walls clamp down and flutter around him he was pushed over the edge.

It was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. His orgasm took over his entire body, and instead of cresting the wave and allowing it to subside, it just kept building and building until he couldn't take anymore. His cock pulsed almost painfully as he spilled himself within her. With a shuddering sigh and the repeated mantra of, "Thank you, thank you," he collapsed in a sweating heap on top of her.

The vibe was still sending pulsating shockwaves straight to his cock, and as a result, he couldn't stay where he was comfortably for long. As he pulled out of her, the vibe caught on the ridge of his head once again, almost causing him to collapse against on top of her again. She quickly fumbled with the vibrator, pulling it out and turning it off before opening her arms to Peeta. He allowed himself to be fully enveloped in her embrace as conscious thought finally began to return to him.

"How are you feeling, angel?" she asked him.

"Good," he answered her. "Really fucking good." He took a deep breath and began to laugh. "Really fucking incredible, actually. Jesus, Katniss, I've never felt anything like that."

"Glad to be of service," she chuckled in response, gripping him tighter as an aftershock wave of pleasure coursed through his body. They were covered in a sheen of sweat which soon began to cool against their bodies. "Do you want to get under the covers?" she asked him as he shook with cold.

He nodded and together they slid into the dry and welcoming warmth of her bed. Peeta was still basking in the afterglow of the most intense orgasm he'd ever experienced, as a wonderfully relaxed, sleepy feeling washed over him. "I love you so much," he said as he nuzzled into the crook of her neck.

"I know," she said, placing kiss after kiss on the top of his head. "I'm sorry for tormenting you."

"Don't be," he laughed. "That was… wow."

"So you'd be happy to do it again."

"Now?" he asked incredulously. "Katniss, I can't."

"No, not now," she smiled, stroking his hair. "Just at some time."

"I can't say no to you," he replied. "I can never say no to you."

"It's one of the reasons why I love you."

The sleepy feeling intensified as her fingers played with his hair, twisting a few curls round her fingers. With a deep, heavy sigh, he closed his eyes and relaxed even further into her embrace, content in the knowledge that he was able to share intimacy such as he had never known with the woman of his dreams. An aftershock shiver of pleasure ran through him once more as he relived every tortuous yet blissful moment. As he lay still, listening to the thunderous beating of her heart a thought occurred to him and he couldn't help the smirk that slowly crawled across his face. "Katniss?" he asked.

"Hmmm?"

"I noticed a couple of toys with remote controls in your drawer."

"Yup."

"So… I could have complete control over it?" he quizzed her again, his smirk widening.

"Technically, yes."

"Good to know," he replied as all kinds of possibilities ran through his mind and a knowing smile crossed his face. "Very good to know. I guess I'll have to pay you back sometime."

"Oh really?"

"Well, it's only fair, wouldn't you agree?"

Holding him tighter than ever she laughed and echoed his own words. "I can't say no to you. I can never say no to you."

He lifted his gaze up to meet hers. Her sparkling grey eyes were heavily lidded, their post-orgasmic bliss still visible in them, and he brushed a gentle kiss over her lips. "It's one of the reasons why I love you."


	7. Reason Knows Nothing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it's taken a month to update this. I know I said at the start I'd try and update every Friday, but real life got in the way. Sorry!
> 
> Thanks go to my wonderful beta Court81981 for all her help and support and for being a wonderful person generally.
> 
> By the way, if you liked that previous chapter, you'll love what my dear friend Streetlightlove1 has put together; S2SL stands for Smut 2 Save Lives, and is a series of stories written by some of the very best authors this fandom has to offer. Search S2SL on tumblr to find out how to donate, thereby donating money to charity, saving lives and getting yourselves some pretty awesome smut at the same time!
> 
> Oh, and I have a new story out that is very very different to anything else I've written, but feel free to go and check it out, as I'm pretty proud of it so far. The Colour of Heartbreak is an historical and magical AU, so if that's your bag, baby, hopefully you'll enjoy!
> 
> Thanks again for reading, please feel free to leave feedback :)

## February

Embarrassed that Peeta was always the one to cook for them both, Katniss had insisted that Peeta come to hers for Valentine's. She planned on surprising him with a three course, home-cooked meal, which she knew would be a challenge, as usually the extent of her cooking involved nothing more than putting things in the oven on a high heat until they turned a slightly darker shade of brown.

They had eaten out in various vegan friendly places around London and Suffolk, and by and large the food had been surprisingly good; there were occasional times she had cravings for meat, but those were lessening over time, particularly since Peeta had shown her undercover footage of the inner workings of a slaughterhouse. The copious amounts of blood had made her feel incredibly sick, and the filthy conditions looked as far from hygienic as it was possible to be. That, coupled with Peeta's downright refusal to kiss her if he even suspected that she had eaten it, made steering clear of meat a far easier task than she had originally anticipated.

But there were still those occasional cravings. Despite her initial misgivings about seitan, stemming from when she'd first witnessed Peeta making it, she found that it was the best thing to ease those cravings, and by far her favourite meal she'd tried when dining out was a seitan stroganoff. And so for a main course she had decided to try and recreate it at home.

After searching online she found a clear recipe, and while it was far more complicated than anything she had tried before, the rational, scientific part of her mind reasoned that it was simply a case of following instructions, and that there was no reason she couldn't do it.

For a starter she had decided to go with some simple baked garlic mushrooms, and for dessert she'd bought some soy ice cream and was going to attempt to make a chocolate brownie to go with it.

"Don't you think you're stretching your abilities a little thinly?" asked Jo, when she learned what Katniss was planning.

"Ha-ha," she deadpanned. "You just wait. It can't be that difficult."

"We'll see, Brainless. All I'll say is that I don't envy Peeta one bit."

Katniss narrowed her eyes at Jo. If there was one thing she loved doing, it was proving her housemate wrong.

\-----------------------------------------

Everything was set. Jo had a date that night and had assured Katniss that she would be doing everything in her power to make sure she wasn't returning home until the next day, which was a pretty reasonable guarantee that she and Peeta would have the whole flat entirely to themselves all evening. Katniss had glanced at the stroganoff recipe first thing in the morning, and was very pleased to see that it would only take forty-five minutes to cook. Knowing that she wasn't as fast as most in the kitchen she allowed herself an hour to be safe, and had spent most of the day tidying the flat. They didn't have a proper table to sit at, so instead she moved the coffee table to the middle of the room and put a few large, squashy cushions on the floor around it. A few finishing touches to the room made everything perfect; a few candles and tealights dotted around the room added a romantic atmosphere, and a wooden tray burning a stick of Nag Champa completed the picture.

She was absolutely brimming with confidence. Before cleaning the flat, she decided to quickly make the brownies, and in a fit of inspiration, had infused them with some champagne. Peeta had advised her to go to the Co-op for it, as a means of guaranteeing it was vegan, and she had stocked up, knowing how a glass of champagne and a few strawberries could turn any evening into a romantic haven. Once the brownies had come from the oven she allowed them to cool a little before slicing one and tasting it. Perfection. Soft, gooey, rich and delicious. She shook her head at how impressed she'd always been by Peeta's culinary skills. It was nothing to brag about, after all. This was _easy._

With a little over an hour until Peeta was due to arrive Katniss started work in the kitchen, setting her laptop up on the side for easy access to the recipe. As she re-read it panic began to set in. It listed forty-five minutes as the cooking time. Those forty five minutes failed to take in to account the hour that the seitan needed to be cooked separately beforehand, as well as the four hours minimum that the cashews needed to soak in water prior to beginning.

Taking deep breaths to stay calm she began to rationalise. The seitan itself was cooked first in boiling water. Well, the stroganoff had a sauce. It could cook in that. She couldn't think of any reason why the cashews needed to be soaked, so she'd just proceed without that step, and besides, like the seitan, they' be sitting in the sauce for around an hour, and that was mostly liquid… It would work. It had to work.

She quickly mixed together the ingredients for the seitan, retching a little at the slop she created and marvelling that anything so slimy could ever turn into something edible. If she hadn't witnessed the remarkable transformation at Peeta's hands she'd be hard-pressed to believe it.

With a quick look at her watch, a slight amount of panic set in, as time was steadily trickling away from her. Traffic permitting, punctuality was a trait she could readily associate with Peeta, and she had promised him dinner as soon as he walked through the door.

If she could at least get the starter ready and organised, the main course could continue to cook whilst they were eating. ' _Stay calm_ ,' she told herself. ' _Logical. Rational. You can do this.'_

It was the work of a few minutes to arrange the ten mushrooms on a baking tray, and fill them with a mix of dairy-free butter, garlic and parsley. With that done, she felt a little more able to relax.

As quickly as she was able, she assembled the ingredients for the stroganoff. The cashews took a lot of effort to grind down, and she wasn't able to get them as small as she had hoped, but with a little over thirty minutes until Peeta was due to arrive, she had a sauce bubbling away on the stovetop. Using a pair of scissors, she chopped strips of the uncooked seitan mixture into the pot.

Almost immediately she could tell that something was going wrong. The seitan didn't appear to be holding together; instead, small pieces were breaking off, some was even dissolving directly into the sauce. The bottom began to drop out of her stomach; she didn't have time at all to start again. Turning the heat up, hoping that this would cook the raw seitan quicker and stop it breaking apart, she began to pray for a miracle.

Fifteen minutes until Peeta was due to arrive and panic was consuming her. The stroganoff had turned an unappealing grey, and seemed to be slowly congealing into one large, gelatinous lump. Unsure of what to do with it, she ignored the problem, and turned the oven on to begin cooking the stuffed mushrooms.

To calm her nerves she poured herself a glass of the champagne she had opened earlier in the day. It was looking like Jo was right; this had been way too ambitious from the start. The alcohol numbed the feelings of panic briefly but allowed melancholy to rise to the surface. She'd been planning this for so long, and as a perfectionist, she despised her own failure.

Cursing the recipe for misleading her on her original, cursory read-through of it, she sat down to finish her champagne and wondered if it was too late to order a takeaway, transfer it to a saucepan, and pretend that she had cooked it.

A quick glance at her watch told her that would be impossible. She had no option but to serve up the monstrosity she had created. Just as she came to this conclusion, an acrid, burning smell began to sting her nostrils.

Running back to the kitchen, knowing what was awaiting her, did little to ease the panic at seeing thick smoke billowing out from the corners of her oven. She opened the door and was instantly blinded by even more smoke. Waving the clouds away, she was greeted by the sight of her ten garlic mushrooms, shrivelled to blackened crisps. She froze on the spot, completely at a loss as to what to do next.

When she heard the buzzer for the front door go she wanted to cry. All she'd wanted to do was create something perfect to show her gratitude to him and it had failed. Miserably. Leaning against her wall, she took several deep, steadying breaths and blinked back the tears. The buzzer rang again and she realised she hadn't prepped the living room yet. Cursing herself as the angry tears began to fall, she quickly lit the candles and the stick of incense. As she heard the buzzer for a third time she jogged to the entry phone, quickly wiping her face of any stray tears, before she answered the phone to him and buzzed him in. Shame at her failure burned inside her, and she left the door to her flat off the latch so Peeta could let himself in. She didn't feel worthy of even greeting him at the door and instead retreated back into the kitchen, staring down at the bubbling and congealing grey mess on her stove top.

"Katniss?" she heard Peeta's voice call through to her from her hallway and wiped her eyes on the back of her hands again, hoping that he wouldn't notice that she had been upset.

"Here," she called back, cursing herself as her voice cracked slightly.

Peeta picked up on the sound of her distress immediately, "What's wrong?" he called back, and Katniss could hear his heavy footsteps heading quickly towards her. She stepped out of the kitchen, noted the look of worry on his face, and stepped into his waiting arms. "What happened?" he asked urgently.

His scent enveloped her and she buried her face in his chest. When one of his hands cradled the back of her head, the other gently stroking her back she began to cry. "I messed up dinner," she sobbed.

As she clutched on to him even tighter she could feel him relax under her grip. "Is that all?" he said. "I thought you'd hurt yourself."

"It's ruined."

"I bet it isn't."

"Peeta, it's a disaster."

"I bet you anything it's not," he countered.

"You sure you want to go down that route? Because it's not a bet you're going to win."

"You're on. If I'm right, and I am, you have to do anything I ask of you."

She snorted through her tears. "And I get the same if I win? Peeta, you're just giving yourself up to me in any way I want."

"Still sounds like a win to me," he said, as he held her even tighter. "Anyway, I've been looking forward to this all day. Here." He let go of her for a moment and opened his bag, withdrawing two bottles of champagne and handing them to her. "I'm sure it's fine, but worst case scenario, we'll just get too drunk to taste anything."

At his words she felt a little ray of happiness bubble up inside her and she couldn't help but laugh a little. Drying her eyes on the back of her hands, she took the bottles from him and said, "We better get started then. I've got a couple of cold ones in the fridge. You're going to need a drink before you eat any of this."

"Sure thing," he smiled, kissing the top of her head. "But don't keep me waiting too long. I'm starving."

She led him through to the living room and told him to make himself comfortable while she fetched the opened bottle of champagne. Once she returned to him, the bottle and two champagne flutes in hand, she couldn't help but feel a little more relaxed. He was sat cross-legged on the floor on one of the large cushions, and as soon as she put the bottle and glasses down he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her down on to his lap.

"Missed you," he said simply, before he tilted her chin towards him. His tongue fluttered along her lower lip and she sighed as she opened her mouth to him. Kissing him was something she would happily do forever, if she could. His lips were always so soft yet insistent and his tongue…. She moaned into him as she thought about the magic he could work with his tongue, and yet just as soon as he started to kiss her he pulled away, eliciting a groan of disappointment from her. Sparkling blue eyes met her stormy greys and Katniss could see the pinpricks of light from the candles dotted around the room reflected in them. "How's about that drink, then?" he smiled, picking up the two flutes and pouring them both a glass while she remained seated in his lap. Handing one to her, he gently clinked his own glass against hers and took a sip. "How much do I need to drink before you'll serve up?" he smirked.

"For your own safety, at least a whole glass," she replied, the sinking feeling returning as she remembered that she was going to be serving him with what could well be the most inedible food he'd ever eaten. "Look, do you want a takeaway instead?" she asked desperately.

"No!" he protested. "I want what you've made. And besides," he said, downing the entire flute of champagne, "I've had a whole glass now. So any time you want to serve dinner, I'll be happy."

She sighed deeply as she climbed out of his lap. "It's your funeral," she said half under her breath as she walked into the kitchen. Refusing to even glance at the slop that she was going to try and pass off as a main meal, she opened the oven door and was hit by a wave of smoky heat which caused her to cough and splutter.

"Do you need help serving?" he called through to her.

"No," she replied stubbornly.

"You sure?" he asked, and she was certain she could detect a hint of laughter behind his words. "Maybe I should call the fire brigade instead?"

"Right," she said, storming back into the living room. "I know this is a fuck-up. You know it's a fuck-up. But you're the one insisting we eat this shit, so the least you can do is shut up with those kind of comments, ok?"

"Ok," he said, his hands held up in a placatory gesture, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. Really. It smells good."

She eyed him suspiciously as he still seemed to be biting his lip to supress his laughter before turning on her heel and heading back into the smoke-filled kitchenette. The ten mushrooms were burned to the point of being almost black, and had shrunk to the size of marbles. Shaking her head, she scraped them on to two separate plates. They looked pathetically small and out of place, and out of desperation to at least try and make it look edible, she added a few salad leaves to the side of each plate. Swearing under her breath and trying to swallow the nervousness she felt, she picked up the two plates and returned to the living room.

"I'm sorry," she said as she placed the plate in front of him.

"What for? This is fine," he said, popping one of the mushrooms into his mouth.

"It's burned to a cinder, Peeta," she replied, pushing her own around her plate, unwilling to even try one.

"Chargrilled," he corrected her, kindly. "They're really not that bad," he said, eating another. "Here." He picked one up and held it out towards her, his eyes twinkling as he gently placed it in her mouth. Begrudgingly she had to agree with him. They weren't too bad. If she'd been paying attention and not let them burn they would have been something she'd have been quite proud of.

Predictably enough, Peeta polished off his plate in half the time it took for Katniss to finish hers. The nerves began to bubble up in her again. The starter, while it hadn't been perfect, wasn't what she had been most upset about. "Can we just end the meal here?" she asked him after finishing the last mushroom on her plate.

"No way. I'm still hungry."

"You'll still be hungry when you don't eat what's next," she said miserably, as she went back out in to the kitchen. Lifting the lid on the stroganoff she had to swallow the wave of nausea that rapidly rose within her. Ignoring that particular disaster for now, she popped a pouch of pre-cooked rice in to the microwave and set the time for 3 minutes.

As soon as the microwave pinged, she took a deep breath and split the rice between two plates, topping it with a spoonful of the grey, gelatinous slop. "You might want another drink before you attempt this," she called through to Peeta.

"Just hurry up and bring it through," he responded. Even in the low candle light she was convinced that the heat from her cheeks was noticeable as she set the plate in front of him. "This looks…."

"Like shit," she finished for him. Looking at her own plate she made an instant decision not to eat any of it. "I won't blame you if you don't touch this," she said. "I know I won't."

"Katniss, I'm sure it'll be fine," he smiled, although Katniss was certain that he was trying hard to supress the look of repulsion. He picked up his fork and prodded the lumpy mass on his plate a few times before picking up a forkful and shovelling it in his mouth. The grin slowly faded from his face, and the colour in his cheeks was replaced with a sickly grey pallor a similar shade to the food on his plate. She watched him swallow with difficulty and take several deep breaths before he spoke. "So, ummm… what is this?"

"Seitan stroganoff."

"Oh."

"Don't eat it, Peeta. It's shit."

"No, it's…" He prodded a particularly gelatinous lump and clearly decided it was best avoided. "The rice has come out well," he said, changing the subject slightly.

"It's microwaved. I didn't cook it."

Unable to respond positively, he pushed some rice and a little of the sauce on to his fork, and appeared to be bracing himself before attempting it. "It's umm… it's an interesting texture you've achieved here," he said thickly, quickly washing away the remnants of his last mouthful with a swig of champagne. "How did you cook the seitan?"

"In the sauce."

A slight smirk played across his lips. "And, um, did you knead it all, before you cooked it?"

Her silence was the only answer he required.

"I thought as much. And the cashews? I'm guessing you didn't soak them before they went through a blender."

"How'd you know—?"

"What you've got here, is basically very wet uncooked bread dough, where the gluten hasn't been properly activated, and with a few nutty lumps interspersed through it. Firstly you didn't knead it, so the mixture hasn't had time to form proper proteins. Then you didn't pre-cook, so by placing it in the sauce, without it being at a high enough temperature, you've managed to saturate the gluten. The bottom of the pan must have gotten hot enough to cook at least some of it, hence you've got these—" he paused for a moment, and pulled something solid and curdled-looking out of the grey mess on his plate, "—these glorious little nuggets—"

"Alright, smartarse," she interrupted.

"—And by not soaking the cashews before you put them through a processor, what you got was essentially grit, instead of a smooth paste." He picked up his fork once more as if he were going to brave another mouthful. "At least it's not poisonous though. So it's got that going for it."

"So it's just vile, but not life-threatening. Let's just forget it and move on to pudding, ok? I made us a chocolate brownie, and before you start questioning how that went wrong you can shut your mouth because it didn't."

"No," he said, although there was a definite lack of conviction in his voice. "I'd like to finish this."

"Stop it," she said, snatching the fork from his hand. "Stop trying to make me feel better, because it isn't working."

He held her gaze for a moment before his shoulders sagged in relief. "Sorry, Katniss," he laughed. "But you were right. It really is vile. I don't understand how you could have gotten it so wrong."

"Shut up," she seethed.

Still laughing he poured them both another glass of champagne, and said, "At least we can both just get drunk and forget it." Just as he lifted the glass to his lips he paused, and Katniss noticed every ounce of colour drain from his face as he picked up the bottle and examined it closer.

"What's wrong?" she asked him.

"It's got gelatine in," he said in a low, shaking voice.

"Huh?"

"Cow skeletons, Katniss, you just fed me boiled cow skeletons." Suddenly he was on his feet, storming towards the kitchen. Katniss could hear him draining the glass down the sink, immediately feeling the tears well up. On his return he sat down heavily, a look of horror on his face, as he stared at the offending bottle. "I don't fucking believe this," he muttered under his breath.

Anger swelled inside her, immediately replacing the sadness she had felt moments before. "Don't blame me," she shouted. "You told me to get it from the Co-op. I did what you told me to do!"

"You still have to read the fucking labels, Katniss! Jesus fucking Christ, they sell meat in the Co-op, that doesn't automatically make it vegan!"

"I didn't know! You didn't say that!"

He pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath. Every now and then he seemed to be fighting to supress a gag reflex. "It was an accident," he said after a while, his tone low and flat. "I know you didn't mean it." Katniss watched his Adam's apple bob up and down as he swallowed before speaking again. "I'm sorry I shouted at you. How about dessert?"

A dawning realisation struck her. The brownie she'd made, the only thing that had worked, had been rendered inedible to him. "I thought I'd be clever," she said quietly. "It's been flavoured with some of that champagne."

"Oh."

Silence fell between the two of them before the tears that had been threatening to spill came back with a vengeance. She grabbed hold of the plates with the abandoned and ruined stroganoff, stacking one on top of the other, and took hold of the half empty champagne bottle in her other hand, and marched away from Peeta into the kitchen so that he didn't have to see her cry.

"Katniss?"

Ignoring him, she emptied the remains of the champagne down the sink, before scraping the food into the bin and dropping the plates on the work surface. She sniffed loudly, and impatiently wiped her eyes on the back of her hand.

"Katniss?" She felt the warm weight of his hand on her shoulder for just a moment before he gently turned her around and pulled her into his waiting arms. He squeezed her briefly before walking her through to the living room. "Come here," he said, as he sat down on the sofa, pulling her down to sit beside him. He cupped her face in her hands before gently brushing the tears away from her cheeks.

"I just wanted it to be perfect," she quietly sobbed. "I ruined everything."

"That's completely untrue. So you can't cook. Big deal. I'll stay at home and be the domestic housewife, while you can be the intrepid hunter-gatherer, braving the supermarket in search of such rare beasts as palm oil-free peanut butter, Romanesco broccoli— "

"And boneless champagne?" she interjected with a dark laugh.

"Yeah. I think you need to work on your trapping skills for that one, but with a little practice you'll be an expert in no time."

Almost beyond her own will, a small chuckle was wrenched from her; half laughing, half sobbing, she threw her arms around his neck and said, "I'm so useless."

"Not true. You can't be great at everything. You have strengths in other fields."

"Like what?" she sniffed, sitting up to look at him through her veil of tears.

"You're funny," he said, tucking a few loose strands of hair behind her ear, and then playing with the end of her braid. "You always make me laugh. And you're kind-hearted. I've seen how you get upset over news reports on TV. And generous. And you're a talented writer. An incredible singer. You're my hard-core rebel soldier at computer games—"

"That's hardly a usable skill, Peeta."

"I don't care. It's fun, and I love that you're better than me at them. You're the most exuberant, fun-loving person I've met, you're a hard worker, you're open, you're honest, you're loving—"

"Ok, stop."

"Why? You're beautiful. Inside and out—"

"Peeta, please," she interrupted. "Just, stop. I wanted so much for this to be perfect. I wanted to cook you the perfect dinner and…." she trailed off sadly.

"Stop worrying. I'm not all that hungry anyway."

A loud growling sound came from his stomach, causing Peeta to roll his eyes and Katniss to laugh a little sadly. "You'd be a much more convincing liar if your body didn't betray you all the time."

"Sorry," he replied, a half smile twitching the corners of his mouth upwards. "Have you got anything we can cook quickly?"

"Oven chips?" she suggested half-heartedly. "Beans on toast?"

"I'd kill for a chip butty right now."

Flashing him a quick smile, she stood up to head back out into her kitchenette, but not before Peeta grabbed her around the waist and pulled her back into his lap, bringing her lips to his. "Love you," he told her.

"You too." She made a second attempt to stand and head out to the kitchen, laughing as Peeta pulled her back into his lap once more.

"Just one more thing," he said, holding tight to her so she couldn't move. "I'm just wondering if this counts as a disaster or not. I'd just like to know who belongs to who tonight."

"I think it's pretty safe to say you belong to me, Peeta. How you can describe this as anything other than a disaster is beyond me."

"But you redeemed it with the promise of a chip butty. It's not a total disaster."

"That was never part of the deal. Don't try and squirm your way out of a losing bet. Besides, there's still a chance that I could burn the chips."

"True," he sighed. "Ok, I concede defeat. I'm all yours. Once I've eaten, you can do with me what you want."

She shook her head. "If you want, you can start straight away. Go and make food for us."

A smile crept across his lips, echoing the laughter in his eyes. "As you wish," he said, pushing her from his lap. She made herself comfortable on the sofa as she listened to the sound of Peeta moving around in her kitchen. After a couple of minutes he returned, carrying two clean glasses and one of the bottles of champagne he brought with him. "I don't know how cold this will be, but we can give it a go." The champagne cork made a gloriously satisfying pop, before Peeta poured two glasses, handing one to Katniss. "We have eighteen minutes until the chips are cooked," he said. "Care to think of anything to fill that time?" When Katniss didn't answer immediately, he continued, "Well, I know that you're supposed to be in charge, but am I allowed to make a suggestion?"

"Go ahead," she sighed, taking a small sip from her glass before placing it on the coffee table beside Peeta's.

"I've been thinking of you all day. I mean, I know that's nothing new, but I've been thinking about you a lot today. And how much I want to kiss you."

As he knelt down in front of her, she sat up a little straighter and ducked her head in towards him. "I think I can allow that," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. Her fingers wound into the curls of hair at the nape of his neck and held him steady as their lips met. As she played with those curls with one hand, she rested the other against his chest and could feel his heartbeat, strong and steady, speeding up slightly under her unrelenting kisses.

Slightly breathless, he pulled away from her, resting his forehead against hers. "That was wonderful," he said, slowly running his hands down over her back, and despite his warmth, Katniss shivered in anticipation, "but when I said I wanted to kiss you, I had something else in mind."

"Peeta," she breathed, "you don't have to…"

"No, I lost the bet, fair and square. I have to do whatever you want."

She laughed at his terrible logic. "But I haven't asked you to do anything."

"So you don't want me to?"

"I never said that."

"So you do want me to?"

"Well, yes, all the time, but—"

"Well, shut up then."

She found that she couldn't look at him, especially as a warm glow was creping over her cheeks. She was the one who had messed up everything, and Peeta was trying to make it up to her? Almost as if he could read her thoughts, he spoke once again. "Look, you're upset. And when I'm upset you do everything you can to cheer me up, right?"

"I guess so."

"Well then. Let's just…" he shuddered for a moment, probably remembering the gelatine in the wine. "Let's just forget it. Start the evening from now, ok?"

"Ok," she smiled.

"And you're going to be as happy as possible. So, you're going to drink this—" he handed her back the flute of champagne before reaching to the side for his bag. Rummaging around for a moment, he withdrew a box wrapped in green tissue paper and handed it to her, saying, " —and eat these, and I'm going to make you happy."

"What's this?" she asked, tearing the paper from the box.

"Chocolates. I made them for you."

"You want me to sit here, drinking champagne, eating chocolates while you go down on me?"

He shrugged in an overly-dramatic, resigned manner. "Katniss, if that's what you tell me to do, I don't really see that I have much of a choice. I'm bound by the terms of our bet. You better hurry up and make your mind up though. The clock's ticking, and I'm not letting our _Cordon Bleu_ dinner burn."

He was kneeling in front of her expectantly, and Katniss smiled and shook her head. Despite all his bluster about having to do whatever she said, it was pretty clear that this was something he'd been fantasizing about. And who was she to deny him? "Sure," she said, not quite believing how he had managed to twist everything around. "You know, I think this might be just about the most decadent thing that's ever happened to me," she chuckled as she placed one of the chocolates in her mouth. After biting through the crisp dark chocolate shell, she was met by a soft, rich and creamy ganache, laced with oranges and alcohol. "Oh, Peeta…" she groaned, "these are heavenly."

"Good," he said, as he began to undo the zip on her jeans, smiling at her before pulling them down, along with her underwear, and discarding them on the floor beside him. As he gently pushed her thighs apart, he encouraged her to scoot to the edge of the sofa. Katniss' heart began to race in anticipation, and she swallowed a large mouthful of champagne just as he dipped his head to her centre.

At first she felt his warm breath fanning out across her. This alone caused her insides to squirm pleasurably, and as soon as he pressed a kiss to her she made a keening sound deep in her throat, the intense and sensual shock almost causing her to upend her champagne all over the sofa.

"Careful," he smirked, before parting her folds with his tongue.

Being more prepared this time, she managed to keep hold of her glass as she gripped his hair with her free hand. It was the most wantonly hedonistic experience of her life, and as he pushed his tongue further into her centre, she downed the last of her champagne and abandoned the glass beside her, so that she could fall back against the cushions.

The change in her position meant that Peeta could work his magic far easier, and the satisfied growl he made sent deep, rumbling vibrations straight to her core. Almost of their own volition, her hips began to roll in time with the attention from his tongue. He flattened his palm over her stomach to hold her still and steady, gently ghosting his tongue over her clit.

As his tongue worked over her, alternating between circling her clit, pressing into her entrance, and back again, she felt an intense heat began to pool deep inside her. Her back began to arch off the sofa, and with her left hand she gripped ever tighter to the back of Peeta's head, while the fingers of her right hand entwined with his.

His movements increased in urgency, and in response her breath quickened. She bit down hard on her bottom lip, and clenched Peeta's hand in her own. She could feel the blood pounding through her veins, and as Peeta began to draw small circles with his thumb over the soft skin of her inner thigh, she felt every muscle in her body contract.

Her body bucked upwards as tendrils of heat coiled outwards from her centre. "Peeta….." she whispered throatily, holding him in place as she rode through her orgasm, only relinquishing her grip when her flesh became too sensitive to allow him to stay.

He sat up in front of her, watching her with heavily lidded eyes. Licking his lips, he picked up her discarded flute, and refilled it with champagne before handing it back to her.

"Thank you," she said breathlessly.

"You're welcome," he answered, a proud smile on his lips. He reached for the chocolate box and picked one out, and placed it between his teeth. As Katniss tried to catch her breath, he leant over her, passing the chocolate to her. She could taste the mix of chocolate, alcohol and her own sex on his tongue, and captured his little moan of delight, before he pulled away from her. "Feel better?" he asked softly.

She nodded, stroking her fingers down the side of his cheek. "Thank you," she repeated.

A flash of a broad smile, and he was on his feet and heading towards her kitchenette. She lay back on her couch for a moment, listening to Peeta moving in her kitchenette, before she was able to summon the strength to move. Just as she finished redressing, Peeta returned, a plate in either hand, a large chip butty dripping with ketchup on each.

"Here," he said, handing one of the sandwiches to her. He took a seat next to and immediately began to tuck in to the butty with gusto.

"I'm sorry again," she said again, as she picked up her sandwich.

"For what?" he said thickly through a mouthful of chips.

"This is hardly the most romantic dinner."

"You're fucking kidding me?" he said, smiling and shaking his head. "This is the most romantic Valentine's I've had!"

"You're sure?" she asked, as she began to tuck in to her own food.

"Couldn't be better," he grinned, and his smile was so warm and genuine that Katniss finally felt that perhaps she hadn't ruined his evening after all.

"Thank you for salvaging tonight. Maybe after we've eaten I could repay the favour?"

He looked thoughtful for a moment before replying. "Don't ask me, Katniss. I have to do whatever you say, don't forget."

A sly smile spread across her face, and she answered, "Fine. Then after we've eaten, I order you to lie back, and take what's coming."

His own grin widened, and his eyes sparkled mischievously. "Now you're talking."


	8. Blow the Winter Cold Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so, so, SO unbelievably sorry for the long wait for this chapter. Real life got in the way, and that coupled with an extraordinary writing block as far as this story was concerned, coupled with incredible inspiration for my other story, The Colour of Heartbreak, just meant that this chapter became almost impossible to write.
> 
> But it's done! For those of you that haven't already, you may want to read my oneshot called The Second Hurdle before reading this chapter, as this one deals with some of the events from that story.
> 
> Thanks as always to Court for making sense of the nonsense I originally sent, and turning this into something readable. You're a star, girl!

## March

It had been a long, long time since Peeta had had so much difficulty in mixing exactly the right shade of paint. He studied the photograph of the snow-white cat, lounging in sunshine and looking rather haughtily at the camera, and clicked his tongue in annoyance. Nothing had come even close to capturing the look of the sun as it reflected off the cat's thick fur, and as he had given £950 as a quote for this particular commission, it had to be utterly perfect.

He looked up briefly from the painting and over at Katniss curled up on his sofa, the laptop open in front of her and a look of concentration on her face.

"How's it going for you?" he called out to her.

The sound of his voice caused her to start momentarily, and she looked up from the screen, consternation briefly flashing across her face before a fixed smile appeared just a split second later. "Fine," she replied. "You?"

Something in her tone and behaviour felt wrong to Peeta. "Fine," he said slowly, after a moment's hesitation. "Struggling a bit, but nothing a little tea break won't fix, I'm sure." Katniss had returned her attention to the laptop, and a slight frown creased her forehead. "What's wrong?"

"Huh? Nothing," she responded, that same smile reappearing on her face.

With one last glance at the canvas, Peeta put down his paint brushes. He could allow himself a few minutes, especially if Katniss was worried or upset about something. Walking around to the other side of the easel, he said, "It doesn't sound like 'nothing.'"

Before he could get too close, Katniss snapped the laptop shut. "It's fine, Peeta. Nothing to worry about."

"Well, when you behave all odd and mysterious like this, it feels like, actually, yes it is something to worry about. What's wrong?"

"I was just…. looking at things for your birthday."

He nodded very slightly. As an excuse, it was plausible—his birthday was just over two weeks away—but he didn't believe it for a second. "Katniss," he began, "you're a terrible liar. What's happened?"

She worried at her bottom lip for a moment before responding. "Please don't hate me." As she reopened the laptop, Peeta sat down beside her, an uncomfortable gnawing sensation in the pit of his stomach as he worried about what Katniss could possibly have done.

"You remember that night we argued? You know, about your brothers?"

He stared straight ahead as the memories, both good and bad, of that night came flooding back to him.

"After you…. after you went out, I was furious. And I wasn't thinking straight. I was so angry, Peeta, and so hurt…. And I…. I messaged them. Both of them."

"Oh."

"And, well…. I just got a message from Rye."

"Oh."

"Yeah…."

"Doesn't sound very positive."

She swallowed heavily and said, "Do you want to read it? I should warn you, it isn't overly welcoming. I think maybe you were right."

"Oh, really? You think maybe I know my brothers better than you do?" He furiously blinked away the tears that were threatening to spill, and refused to look at her.

"Peeta, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking when I sent it. And you know I don't want to do anything to hurt you. If you want me to delete it right now, and never speak about it again, I will. But if you want to read it, it's up to you."

Did he? He wasn't sure. The fact that Katniss seemed so very worried about it didn't bode well. But his curiosity was overwhelming. Nodding silently, Katniss turned the laptop towards him, and placed it on his knees.

He read Katniss' outgoing message first, dated from way back in November, and wondered for a moment why it had taken so long for his brother to respond.

_Hi,_

_Apologies for contacting you out of the blue, and I understand if you choose to ignore this message. I am friends with your brother, Peeta. He desperately misses you. I don't know the extent of what happened between you but I believe in letting bygones be bygones, and if there is any way to repair your relationship then I believe you should take that chance before it is too late._

_He doesn't know I've contacted you, so ignoring this message won't open the gulf between you any wider, but if you are interested in seeing him again, please let me know._

_Kind regards,_

_Katniss Everdeen._

Tears clouded his eyes as he read her words, and he impatiently rubbed his eyes on the back of his hands. Taking a deep breath, he continued on to Rye's reply.

_Hi, wasn't ignoring this, but I only just realised facebook has this 'other' inbox. What the fucks that about lol. So only just seen your message._

_Look I don't want to be rude, but if Peeta really wanted to get back in touch he could. Or is he that dumb that he can't work out how to get the telephone number of an established business? Pretty certain the little pleb can remember his own surname. Even if he decided to delete our home number's he could have called Crispian at the bakery any time over the last 5 years but he hasn't._

_But whatever. Frankly I'm not gonna put that level of stupidity past him. So if he wants to call my number is 07790346974. The balls in his court. It'd be nice to hear from him but I won't hold my breath._

_Rye_

He felt totally drained. Betrayed by Katniss and betrayed by his family. Trying to make light of the situation he said, "Dickhead writes like he's still in high school," then he passed the laptop back to Katniss, and returned to stand in front of his painting. He had been struggling to finish it before Katniss' revelation, but now? Now it had become an impossibility.

"Peeta?" Katniss' voice seemed to echo to him over a vast distance. He did his best to block it out by snatching up the photograph of the cat once again, pretending to study it closely, but all the while his mind was focusing on what he'd just read.

His brother was right. He could quite easily have called Crispian at the bakery at any time. And he hadn't once bothered to pick up the phone. He'd always said that they'd cut him out of their lives, not the other way around, and yet here was the evidence to the contrary that he had neatly managed to ignore for so long.

"Peeta?" He felt Katniss' hand alight on his shoulder and suddenly felt too tired to shrug her away. "What are you going to do?"

He sagged under the gentle pressure from her hand. "I'll call him," he said eventually. "And if they want to see me… you'll be there, right?"

"Of course I will," she replied

"Thanks. I don't think I could do it alone."

She clasped her fingers over his, led him back to the sofa, and together they sat in silence for a while, Peeta watching as her thumb drew small circles over the back of his hand. Eventually, she spoke again. "You gonna do it now?"

"Now?" he repeated in a slight panic. He wasn't expecting to do this straight away.

"Uh-huh. No time like the present." She offered him an encouraging smile as she picked his phone up from the coffee table and handed it to him. "You call, I'll make you a tea, ok?" she said, placing a kiss on the top of his head as she stood up.

Peeta watched her leave and head towards his kitchen, his heart racing. His phone felt suddenly much heavier in his hands, almost oppressively so, and a thin layer of sweat had formed above his top lip. He impatiently wiped it away and looked down at the phone in his hands. Did he have the courage to make that call? He wasn't certain. But Katniss believed in him, and he did not want to let her down.

Carefully copying the telephone number from the laptop screen into his phone, his paused for a moment, his thumb hovering over the 'dial' button. What would he say? He had absolutely no idea.

In his kitchen, he could hear Katniss pottering around: the gentle clink of two of two mugs being placed on the work surface, followed by the running of water and the flick of the kettle's switch. She always knew precisely what he would want at any given moment, and right now it was tea and moral support. If it wasn't for her boldness, her realised that he would never be even this close to reconciling with his brothers. And so he decided that he would do this, for her as much as for himself. Without another thought, he hit 'dial.'

He could hardly breathe as he raised the phone to his ear, listening to the drone-like sound of it ringing.

One ring….two… His heart pounded painfully in his throat.

Three times… four….his brother wasn't going to answer and he wouldn't have the courage to try again.

Five rings…..six…Peeta was on the verge of hanging up when he heard a familiar voice, as if echoing from the past.

"Hello?"

He paused for a moment, his throat suddenly dry, and was silent just long enough for his brother to repeat himself.

"Hello?"

"Rye," he said at long last, desperately trying to keep him emotions in check. "It's me."

A slight pause on the other end of the phone, then, "Peeta?"

"Mmm-hmm."

"I wasn't expecting you to call so soon."

"Yeah…well…"

Another emotion-filled pause, drawn out and awkward, before Peeta heard Rye clear his throat with a quiet cough. "You been ok?"

"Yes, thank you. You?" Peeta asked, cringing at how stiff and formal he sounded.

"Pretty good, cheers. A lot's changed since we last saw you."

"You're not kidding," replied Peeta, his mind still entirely blank. This conversation was proving to be even more difficult than he had anticipated. "So," he said after another awkward pause, "you're a dad, huh? I can't believe it."

"Me neither at times," chuckled Rye. "Nate'll be starting school in September. It's gone so quick."

Peeta felt a dull blow to his stomach. His nephew would be starting school soon? Did this young boy even know he had another uncle? More evidence of just how much he had missed out on. It was time to rectify this. "I think... I think I'd prefer to have this conversation face to face," he said, swallowing the nerves that threatened to overcome him.

"Yeah..." replied Rye after a moment or two. "Me too."

Rye agreed to speak with Crispian and find a time when the two brothers could come up to visit. Eventually it was decided that on the 19th of March, two days after Peeta's birthday, the Mellark family would be reconciled— or torn apart irrevocably. ' _No_ ,' thought Peeta furiously, as that particular idea came to him unbidden. He would not allow himself to think the worst.

He awoke even earlier than usual on the morning of the 19th, and sat in his kitchen nursing a large mug of tea. Katniss was still asleep; he hadn't wanted to disturb her so early, especially as she looked so beautiful and peaceful in her slumber.

And so he sat alone in his kitchen with nothing but his own anxiety for company, watching the minutes slowly tick past. To try and distract himself, he began measuring ingredients into a large bowl. Flour first. Margarine second, which he delicately rubbed into the flour. Yeast, a pinch of salt and a pinch of sugar next, which he crumbled into the mixture. Warm water, which he added a few tablespoons at a time. He could make this simple bread in his sleep.

He turned the dough out onto his work surface and began kneading it, forcing his fear and anxiety out as the mix slowly turned from a soft, shaggy blend into a springy, pliable dough. Once satisfied, he placed this inside a freshly oiled bowl and set it to one side to rise. The sense of calm he felt did not last long, and he began to make some cupcakes to restore it once more.

Katniss favoured anything chocolate flavoured, whereas he preferred the warming spice of cinnamon. ' _Why choose between the two_?' he thought, as he began measuring ingredients once again.

By the time Katniss awoke and joined him in the kitchen, he had gone entirely overboard and had sat down for a moment, a fresh cup of tea in hand. He heard a slight shuffling sound as she entered, and he looked up to see her wrapped in his dressing gown. "Are you thinking of opening your own bakery?" she joked as she looked around at the bread, cakes, and cookies all set out on various plates around the kitchen.

"Oh shit," he answered. "Is that what it looks like? Do you think Cris'll think I'm having a dig at him?"

"No," she said, wrapping his dressing gown tighter around her slender form. "It looks like you wanted to make an effort. It's a good thing." She paused for a moment. "You ok?"

"Mmm," he grunted, feeling a nerve in his jaw twitch slightly. His non-committal noise clearly hadn't convinced Katniss, for she reached out and cupped the side of his face. He closed his eyes and leaned into her touch.

"No, you're not," she said. "But you will be." She placed a soft kiss on the crown of his head and said, "You know they'll be just as nervous as you?"

"I doubt that's possible," he murmured. "They've got each other for support."

"And you've got me," said Katniss in response as she cupped his face and forced him to look at her. There was a blazing determination in her eyes that softened after a moment or two "What can I do? How can I help you relax?"

He couldn't help the almost shy smile that crossed his face at her words. "Well, I can think of one sure-fire way."

The hungry, lustful look in his eyes as she grinned and dropped to her knees in front of him would, he was certain, stay with him forever.

*********************************

As the clocks rolled inexorably closer to two o'clock, the time that Crispian and Rye had said they would aim to arrive, Peeta's nerves became almost unbearable. He alternated between sitting stony-faced staring at the television, to pacing back and forth in his living room, occasionally looking out of the front window to see if there was any sign of his brothers, to fussing around in the kitchen, worrying that he hadn't prepared enough food.

When at long last he heard the distinctive sound of a car pulling up in his driveway, and as Belle began to bark at the front door, he turned to Katniss, his face drained of colour and said, "I can't do this."

"Yes, you can," she answered, as she straightened his collar and kissed his lips. "Just keep calm and be yourself."

The barking in the hallway became louder and more excitable with the sound of footsteps approaching the front door, and Katniss took hold of Belle's collar, leading her away from the front door. Moments later, a loud knock resounded and Peeta stared at the door, feeling momentarily frozen to the spot. Almost against his own will, his feet moved him forwards until he opened the door and found himself face to face with his brother, Rye.

He drank in the face that he hadn't seen in years, and hovered awkwardly on the doorstep, unsure of how to proceed.

"You gonna invite us in then?" said Rye after a moment, breaking the tension, and at his words Peeta flung his arms around his brother's neck, clutching on as if for dear life.

"Alright," said Rye, extricating himself from Peeta's vice-like grip. "Let's just try and get through today first, ok?"

Peeta stepped back and nodded, feeling the heat rush to his cheeks. It was clear that there was still going to be tension between the three brothers, even after all this time.

It didn't take long after Rye's arrival for Crispian to show up as well. Peeta had known Delly, Rye's wife, since childhood, and had always gotten on well with the bubbly blonde. She was immediately affectionate towards Peeta, and introduced their son, Nate, as if no time had passed between them at all. He was grateful for their childhood friendship, feeling that her being present may well make the day so much easier.

However, he had never before met Crispian's wife, Lavinia— and she seemed oddly quiet and stuck-up. Her near-silent presence made Peeta hugely uncomfortable as her large, reproachful eyes kept watch over him, as if she were quietly judging everyone in the room.

He couldn't stop his leg from twitching, a sure-fire sign of his nerves. Katniss' presence by his side kept him as grounded as possible. Her arm settled across his back and he clutched on to the top of her thigh while trying to maintain regular breathing. All the attention in the room was drawn by Nate who was singing a nonsense song about a rabbit called Stephen. Delly was sat on the floor with him, laughing and singing too, and Peeta couldn't help the small smile that spread over his lips. But it was tinged with sadness. He'd missed so much of this, and as far as Nate was concerned, he wasn't family. Not yet, anyway.

In the kitchen, he heard the kettle click and was about to stand up when Katniss quietly said, "It's ok. I'll go."

He watched her walk away and let out a long exhalation, suddenly feeling like a stranger in his own home. The five other people sat in his living room were a proper family, and Peeta had no idea what to say to them.

"So," said Rye, once Katniss was in the kitchen, "I take it she's more than just a 'friend,' then?"

Peeta nodded, still watching Nate as he sang.

"What happened to the other one?"

"The other one?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah. What was her name?"

"Jenn? Or Jenny?" interjected Crispian.

"Yeah, that's it. What happened to her?"

"She left me," answered Peeta.

"Good. Couldn't stand her."

Despite accepting that his brothers had been right about Jenn all along, it didn't stop the comment from stinging somewhat.

He was saved from having to answer by Katniss returning with a tray bearing teas and coffees for everyone. A few moments later she returned again with a plate of Peeta's beautifully decorated cupcakes and cookies.

"Oh, Peeta," said Delly, as she took a cinnamon cupcake from the plate, "these look wonderful! I'm so happy to see you've kept this up! I always loved your cakes."

"Thanks, Dell," smiled Peeta, grateful for her presence.

"I think it would be best if we get this out in the open sooner rather than later, don't you? Then maybe we can have a nice, normal afternoon once everything's resolved." said Crispian, cutting into Peeta's hopeful line of thought. His heart pounded uncomfortably in his chest at the thought of the inevitable confrontation, and as he wiped his sweating palms on his jeans, he wondered, not for the first time, if he had made the right decision in telephoning his brother.

Kneeling down in front of Nate, he said in a gentle tone, "Do you like animals, Nate?"

"Yes!" replied the young boy, jumping up and down on the spot.

"Yeah? What's your favourite animal?"

The boy looked thoughtful for a moment, before a wide grin spread across his face. "Peppa Pig!" he said.

"Peppa Pig? Wow…. How would you like to meet a real-life Peppa?"

Nate's eyes widened. "Yes please!"

"Well," said Peeta, "I reckon if you ask Auntie Katniss really, really nicely, she might take you and mummy and Auntie Lavinia outside to meet them."

"Can we, mummy?"

"You'll have to ask Auntie Katniss, pickle."

Nate chose that moment to turn shy and turned into Delly's arms, clutching tightly to her.

Katniss smiled and said, "It's ok. We'll go and make friends with the piggies, and then maybe you and I can be friends too. Deal?"

Nate nodded shyly, clambering to his feet, and following Katniss from the room, Delly and Lavinia following in their wake. At last, the three brothers were left alone. No one spoke for a long while, until Crispian finally broke the silence. "Well," he said, "I guess we have a lot to talk about."

Peeta nodded, unsure of how to start. He tried to recall the details of their last conversation, but couldn't remember specifics, only general accusations. One of those accusations leapt to the forefront of his mind. "I wasn't disrespecting Dad when I sold the house."

"That's what you said back then, Peeta. But it sure felt like it," said Crispian, placing his mug on the floor beside his feet.

"I don't know how you could say that."

"Oh, come on, Peet," said Rye. "We hardly see you at all while Dad's getting ill, then within days of the Will being settled and finalised you're getting the place valued."

"I couldn't get away!" he protested, stung. "I tried, but it was easy for you to see him, he was just up the road, but I was a couple of hundred miles away, I didn't have a car, I couldn't get much time off work, and I couldn't afford the train fare. It wasn't because I didn't want to see him, you have to know that!"

"Yeah. You had no time or money to see him while he was alive. Funny how you had no problems getting down once he was dead."

He felt the conversation slipping away from him. They had no idea the torment he had gone through when his father was diagnosed with an aggressive and inoperable brain tumour, given just a couple of months to live. At the time he had taken a job as an office junior, the only work available that he could find, and they weren't exactly sympathetic to their newest employee taking so much time off. Train fares were expensive as it was, and if he could have gone during the week it would have been a financial strain, but at weekends the fares shot up. It wasn't a case of not wanting to go and visit. He simply was unable to get down there.

He had been beyond devastated to learn of his father's death. And at long last his employers gave him compassionate leave to head down to the south coast to try and deal with the aftermath of the death.

"Look," he said, swallowing the hard lump in his throat, "I don't expect you to understand. But I'm telling you the truth. We were struggling every day to get by and—"

"You could have come home if you were struggling that badly," said Rye. "Nothing was keeping you up here. Except that little tart of yours."

"Don't call her that," said Peeta. His family had never really liked or approved of Jenn, and the fact that they were right about her all along didn't make hearing them badmouth her any easier.

"Why did you split up, anyway?"

Peeta felt a phantom twinge in his left foot. He didn't get too many phantom feelings in his missing limb these days. Certainly not as many as he used to. Only when he felt under a great deal of pressure. His brothers still didn't know about his accident. Nor about the subsequent hellish depression after Jenn had left him. And he wasn't sure if he could cope with the mingled looks of horror and sympathy if he explained precisely what had happened.

"I told you," he said at last, "she left me."

"Please tell me you didn't put her name on the deeds when you bought this place. Please, tell me you did something right, at least," said Crispian.

"It's in my sole name."

"Thank god for that."

"How much did you get for the place in the end, Peeta?" asked Rye.

Peeta swallowed back the bile that was rising in him. His brothers were not going to like the answer he had for them. "Six-twenty," he said quietly.

"Six hundred and twenty grand," repeated Crispian. "And I'd be willing to bet this place didn't cost you anywhere near that much."

He looked around, desperate for Katniss to return, for the support and comfort that her presence offered, but was unable to answer. His silence spoke volumes to his brothers.

"Well, that's answered that."

"What do you want me to say?" said Peeta at last.

"For you to admit you only cared about his money," replied Crispian.

"But it's not true!"

"He worked hard his whole life to provide for us and you threw it away the instant he was gone."

"Not true," he repeated, shaking his head vehemently.

"What do you think he would have said? If he knew you were going to do what you did?" asked Rye.

Peeta thought about everything he had done with the money that he had received from the family home. He had bought his own property. Paid off all his student debts. Set up his own sanctuary, as well as set up a shelter for rehoming abandoned cats. He had founded a reasonably successful art business on top of that, and was one of the few people that he knew of from his time at university who was actually making use of their degree. "I think he'd have been proud of me," he answered with a quiet defiance.

Out of the corner of his eye he could see Katniss, stood framed in the portal of the door. She offered him a small half-smile. ' _Yes, he would_ ,' it seemed to say. ' _And so am I._ "

"Proud?" said Crispian.

Peeta flashed Katniss another glance. She nodded him encouragement before retreating back outside, and he became emboldened by her action. "Yes," he said. "Look at this place. This is what I've always wanted. And I've done this myself. I've overcome depression and disability and I ran this place single-handed for years and—"

"What are you on about, 'depression and disability'?" said Rye.

Peeta stumbled. He hadn't meant to mention the accident at all. "Nothing," he said hastily. "I just mean that after Jenn left me I was alone, but I still kept this place running, I still kept working."

"Odd choice of words," continued Rye.

"Why'd she leave you, again?" asked Crispian.

Peeta paused for just a moment. Even though he now knew the truth— that Jenn had left him because she'd been having an affair, and that his accident was her opportunity to leave rather than her reason— he still found himself blaming the amputation. He'd spent so long believing that had been her reason that it was hard to undo the years of conditioning. "Turns out she was sleeping with someone else," he said at last.

"Should have listened to us. We all said she was bad news."

Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, Peeta said, "Yes, Cris. Well done. Captain Hindsight wins again."

"No need to be snarky, mate. We were just looking out for you."

"Endless criticizing, and then cutting me out for living my own life. That sure is a great way of showing how much you cared."

"And as always, you're over-simplifying and over-dramatizing. "

Peeta paused once more. He could feel the conversation slipping away, in much the same way it had the last time he and his brothers had met. "Look," he said, once he had composed himself once more, "I'm not asking you to understand why I wanted this, but…can't you just be happy for me? Please?"

Rye turned away from his brothers and looked out of the window. The full extent of Peeta's property could not be seen from that particular window, but Peeta watched as his brother stared out over his patio, which was currently covered in cherry blossom falling from the nearby trees. At that moment, one of the cats entered the room, meowing loudly and demanding attention from his master. Rye turned from the window as Peeta scratched the noisy cat behind the ears.

"You're happy?" Rye asked.

"Yes," answered Peeta, barely containing his own exasperation.

"Well, you're right. I don't understand this fascination you've always had, with thinking you're saving the world. And I don't think I ever will. But I guess if you're happy…" Rye shrugged his shoulders, and Peeta held his breath as he waited for acceptance at long last. Rye stood up and walked over to the window. "You planning on staying here a while?" he asked.

"Mmm-hmm."

Rye nodded and let out a long, deep exhalation. "It'd be a good place to bring up a kid, one day. You two got any plans to…?"

"It's a little early for that kind of talk," said Peeta with a nervous laugh, although at his brother's words a vision of a happy future came to his mind, where Katniss had moved in and they were married with children of their own. It was a truly joyous thought. However, there would be plenty of time to dwell on that particular dream in future. He turned his thoughts back to the present. Clearing his throat with a small, nervous cough, he said, "So, does that mean…?"

He tried to catch Rye's gaze, but Rye had turned back to the window, and was trying to look through the honeysuckle archway, and down the length of the garden to where his wife and son were meeting the animals. And so instead, Peeta looked to Cris expectantly, wanting to hear the words that he had been longing to hear.

"If you're happy, Peeta, we are too."

It was as if the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders. "Thank you," he said quietly, quickly wiping his eyes on the back of his hand. "Thank you." With shaking hands, he lifted his mug of tea to his lips, and pulled a face when he realised it had gone cold. "Does anyone want another?" he asked.

"Got anything stronger?" asked Cris, and Peeta nodded, climbing to his feet and hurrying out to the kitchen.

As he opened the fridge door, he felt a gentle touch on his back and turned around to see Katniss looking at him expectantly. "I've just come to get Nate some orange juice. Everything ok?" she asked, in a hushed tone.

His face cracked in a wide smile. Yes. Everything was ok. And it was all thanks to the beautiful woman who stood before him. He swept her up in a fierce embrace and kissed her again and again and again, while the image of her as a mother to his children popped back into his mind. "Perfect," he said to her, as he reluctantly let her go. "Everything is just perfect."


	9. Vestiges of Stubborn Grey

## April

Katniss thought back to the first night that she and Peeta had ever spent together—how she had still been intent on exposing his group as criminals and vandals, and how Peeta had insisted she join them as they broke into a factory farm and liberated eight hens from the hell of the battery cages. She recalled the fear that they would be caught; she recalled the disgust at seeing the birds first hand, the helplessness at having to leave so many of them behind… That rescue mission seemed like a walk in the park compared to what they would be attempting tonight.

Since meeting with his brothers again, Peeta had become agitated. They may have parted cordially enough, but that hadn't stopped the little digs his brothers had given him about what he had chosen to do with his life and inheritance. Katniss had told him to ignore them, that siblings would always try to wind each other up. But he took their jibes very personally and, as a reaction against them, threw himself back into caring for his animals to the extent that Katniss began to feel that he didn't have time for her anymore.

In his own words he was "fed up with how fucking complacent" he'd become. It seemed that he used to take every opportunity he had to protest, to go on rescues, to go sabbing, but since he had been with Katniss he had been far more content to sit at home and just be with her, his only activism taking place behind a keyboard. Katniss had watched him becoming moodier and surlier, getting angry at every advert on TV, every cooking programme. She could see him seething at strangers in the street, hear him clicking his tongue in disgust at the supermarket… He seemed to be angry at the whole world.

And so Katniss suggested he try and get a bit more involved again. If he could focus his anger on a task, do something that made him feel like he was achieving something, she thought it would help bring him out of the spiralling descent of rage that he appeared to be falling in to. And she was worried for them. She missed Peeta being sweet and kind. She missed his easy smile and his ready jokes, his self-deprecating humour and witty banter.

He started small, by ordering a batch of stickers from a no-holds-barred animal rescue charity that showed animals in the process of being slaughtered with the caption _'This flesh had a face.'_ On his next trip to the supermarket he went straight to the meat aisles that he usually avoided like the plague. The packaging on the beef and steaks showed an idyllic scene of one or two cows grazing in a wide open field, clear blue skies overhead. Peeta picked up a packet, pretending to be interested although Katniss could feel the discomfort and repulsion emanating off him in waves. When the packet was replaced, instead of the idyllic scene it now showed two side-by-side images that were closer to reality. One showed several cows jammed together in a factory feedlot. They were covered in filth and faeces, with open sores around their legs. The other showed a cow strung up by the hind legs, fear in her eyes as blood poured from her opened throat. He moved on to the dairy aisle, placing stickers of tiny day-old calves lying in the mud with a bullet through their brains with the caption _'I was killed so you could drink my mother's milk'_ on the cartons of milk, yoghurt, and packets of cheese.

It seemed to appease him for a while— he wasn't even bothered about the lifetime ban Asda placed on him when he was caught— and Katniss was beyond happy to see him smiling and back to his happy-go-lucky self. But it didn't last. He was itching to do something more 'hands-on' and direct. And so he had made enquiries with Thresh, who was the most deeply involved activist he was still in contact with. And through him, Peeta heard about the raid on a vivisection lab. This was far more dangerous than breaking into the battery farms, and would carry a higher penalty if they were caught. Peeta had tried to persuade her to stay behind, but she was worried about how reckless he would be without her influence and so had insisted on coming along too. She was beginning to regret the decision as the time drew nearer for them to leave the safety and comfort of his cottage.

"Peeta," she said soothingly, "you don't have to do this."

"And you don't have to come," he replied tersely as he pulled on a black hooded sweater.

"Yes, Peeta," she sighed. "Yes, I do."

He stopped dressing for a moment and looked up at her, his expression softening. "I mean it, Katniss. I want you to be safe, and you'll be safest here."

"And what about you?" she asked, stepping closer to him. "I want you to be safe, too."

"I'll be fine," he replied, not looking her in the eyes. Katniss was not convinced.

"Peeta," she said, reaching out and stroking the side of his face. He closed his eyes and leant into her touch. "If you go, I'm coming with you. You can't stop me."

"Why?" he asked, his fingers reaching up to entwine with hers.

"Because," she replied. "Just, because. That's what I do. I look out for you."

"We look out for each other," corrected Peeta. Their fingers were still knotted together, and Peeta raised their hands together, placing her fingers at the nape of his neck, before he gently cupped her chin and drew her towards him.

His lips ghosted over hers, and immediately Katniss felt the desperate hunger that she always associated with his kisses. One kiss would never be enough for her. She drew his bottom lip into her mouth, grazing her teeth along it, revelling in the little moans of pleasure she could elicit from him.

They paused for a moment, gazing deep into each other's eyes, both utterly breathless. Katniss smiled a little at the flush that had crept across Peeta's cheeks before she grabbed the hem of his sweater and pulled it up and over his head in a single movement. His t-shirt followed a moment later, and she pushed on his chest, walking him backwards until he collapsed on to his sofa.

She could clearly see his erection tenting the black jogging pants he had chosen to wear, and an anticipatory wave of pleasure spread outwards from her belly.

"Katniss..." Peeta's voice was quiet, husky with desire but tinged with an edge of worry. His eyes flashed towards the wall clock, but Katniss didn't care. She had to do something for him, something to make him happier...

"Katniss..." he repeated, a slightly more desperate edge to his voice, as she knelt before him and hooked her fingers through the waistband of his pants, pulling them down over his hips.

As she palmed his erection through his boxer briefs, his head fell back against the sofa, and her name fell from his lips once more. "Shhh, angel," she whispered as she encouraged him to lift his hips so she could pull his boxers down too.

As soon as she wrapped her lips around him, he began to moan incoherently. She relished in how his fingers tangled into her hair as she ever so slowly pulled away from him. Pausing briefly, she looked up. Peeta's eyes had fallen closed, his head resting back against the sofa. For the first time in weeks, he looked relaxed and carefree.

Very slowly, his eyes fluttered open and he looked at her questioningly. "Please?" he whispered, as his fingers gently massaged the back of her head.

She allowed him a slight smile before dipping her head back down and slowly licking the entire length of his shaft, from the base to the very tip. She repeated this move several times more, until Peeta began to whine in frustration. She rewarded him by kissing the very tip, then lapping at and swallowing the pre-cum that began to form.

Part of her wanted to keep teasing him, while another part wanted nothing more than to give him his release. Her tongue flicked over the head of his cock, circling around the ridge, while she wrapped her fingers around the base. As he groaned in approval, she started steadily stroking him as she took as much of him into her mouth as she could.

"Katniss…" he whispered, the 's' of her name turning into a long, drawn-out, sibilant sigh. "Oh, Katniss…"

Encouraged by the sounds escaping him, she took him even deeper, and as he began to gently thrust upwards into her mouth, she could feel the wetness pooling between her thighs. He managed to warn her just moments before he came, and she continued to suck him through his orgasm until he was utterly spent and begging her to stop.

Breathlessly, she climbed onto the sofa next to him, swung her legs over his lap and rested her head against his shoulder. Her hand drifted down to cover the tattoo that sat over his heart, and through his ragged breathing she could feel the strong pound of every beat.

A deep sigh came from him as he wrapped his arms around her. "You want me to stay here tonight? If that's what you want, I'll stay."

Hope welled up inside her, and she looked up into his eyes. All she could see was sadness. Her gaze drifted down once more to his tattoo: a raised fist and a raised dog's paw side by side, directly over his heart. He had once explained to her that it symbolised animal liberation. He'd had it done over his heart as an everyday reminder to him of what was most important to him: nothing more or less than doing everything in his power to eliminate suffering in the world.

This was important to him. And what was important to him was important to her. He'd never forgive himself for passing up this opportunity to save at least one life...

"No," she said at long last. "But we'll go into this together as one, ok? You're not leaving me behind."

The kiss he placed on her forehead was so soft and gentle, so sincere, that for a moment Katniss felt a slight pricking behind her eyes as she was overcome by her feelings of love for him. She quickly blinked the feeling away as she swung her legs off him and stood up off the sofa.

"Don't you want me to make you happy?" Peeta asked her, hooking a finger in to the back pocket of her jeans.

"Later," she said. "If we get back safely."

"When we get back safely," he corrected her.

Despite his confidence, Katniss did not feel especially reassured.

______________

This was to be a highly organised operation, with activists converging on the lab from various sabbing groups around the country. They had organised to meet at a location near the labs, and then they planned to break in through the fences surrounding them. Research had shown that the security was at a minimum between midnight and 6 a.m., so they would arrive at around 1 a.m. to be on the safe side.

When Thresh pulled up outside the cottage around midnight, Katniss had to physically swallow her nerves. She didn't want Peeta seeing how scared she was. But she was determined that no matter what, she would help Peeta, and bring him home safe and sound.

Peeta loaded his rescue equipment into Thresh's van. The activists were each going to be targeting a different part of the lab to get to different animals and save as many lives as possible. Thresh, Katniss and Peeta had been assigned the beagles. He took with him a pet-carrying case, together with the usual bolt cutters, crowbar, wire cutters, and various other tools that could come in handy.

The three of them travelled mostly in silence, until at long last, they reached the laboratories. Thresh drove straight past them for nearly a mile, finally turning into a layby and parking the car under cover of dense woodland. The van was perfectly well hidden and would not be noticed by anyone casually driving past.

"We need to head through the trees," said Thresh, as he unloaded the equipment from the van. Peeta took the largest, heaviest burlap sack, and flung it over his shoulder, as if it were weightless, while Katniss took hold of the carry case. Thresh then handed both Katniss and Peeta a black balaclava, before picking up a bag of his own and leading the way through the woods.

Katniss could not help but worry about the difficulty Peeta appeared to be having in picking his way across the rough terrain. Every single one of his footfalls sounded like a clap of thunder in the clear night air, and he seemed to stumble on more than one occasion.

"Are you ok?" she whispered, reaching for his hand. He squeezed hers in response, but offered no other answer.

Eventually, they reached a small clearing. The flood lights of the laboratory could clearly be seen a little way through the trees, and Katniss began to feel nervous with anticipation. She forced herself to focus. She had done nerve-racking things many times as an undercover reporter. But, she realised, it had only been her in danger. She'd never before had to worry about someone she cared so deeply for as Peeta.

There were around 25 other people in the clearing, all dressed in black or camouflage, and all wearing or carrying balaclavas. It would be an absolute miracle if they all got out of this safely.

Katniss was barely aware of how long they had been converged in the clearing, when suddenly they all began to move. "Let's go," said Peeta. "Stick close to me."

Each group of activists had a plan of the lab so they were able to find the quickest way in, and also the quickest way out once their rescues were complete. Katniss suddenly had to supress the most inappropriate laugh. A year ago, this would have been precisely the sort of activity she would have sought to expose in an undercover story. And now she was genuinely taking part in a rescue. Funny, the way life could turn on its head like that.

She felt as if she were trapped in a strange, dream-like state as the activists began crawling through a hole that had been cut into the wire fence. Once she, Peeta, and Thresh were through, along with a group of seven other activists, they quickly crossed to one of the lab's entrances. "This is where we see if we've been sold out, I guess," said masked woman's voice, as she swiped a card over the security post and tapped a number into the keypad. The door buzzed very gently and opened a fraction.

Katniss released a breath that she hadn't realised that she had been holding. She had been certain that they were about to set off alarms.

Once inside, Thresh pulled out a miniature torch to check their position on the laboratory plans. "This way," he whispered, turning off the torch, and setting off down the hallway at a speedy pace.

After several twists and turns through the corridors, Thresh stopped outside a locked door. "Keep an eye out," he whispered as he reached into his bag and withdrew a rather illegal-looking set of tools. Placing the miniature torch between his teeth, he then inserted a couple of the tools into the keyhole, twisting and turning them ever so slowly and gently, until a satisfying click sounded their entry into the room beyond.

When Katniss had her first experience of breaking into a factory farm, she had felt physically sick at the sight of the thousands of birds crammed together in cages, all awaiting their fate. Once again, she gasped at the sight before her.

The walls were lined with cages, and each one housed a beautiful beagle. Most of the dogs were asleep, but at the sound of the intruders, one or two started to stir. They raised their mournful eyes and watched Katniss, Peeta, and Thresh warily. Katniss was certain that they would start to bark soon, and give their rescuers' positions away, but the dogs remained eerily silent.

Almost as if he could read her thoughts, Peeta said, "They tend to use beagles because of how trusting and passive they are." The disgust and anger in his voice was apparent, and Katniss felt a thrill of nerves. She couldn't allow Peeta's passion to overrule his judgement.

"Let's just get this done quickly, ok?" she said, forcing her voice to sound calmer than she was.

"Agreed," said Thresh, stopping before one of the cages. "Over here, Peeta."

Both Katniss and Peeta joined Thresh, and Katniss melted at what she saw. Inside the cage were four beautiful beagle puppies that could not have been more than a couple of months old. All four were fast asleep. "They're gorgeous," she whispered.

"I know," replied Peeta. "But not for long if they stay here. They're coming with us."

The front of the cage was padlocked shut, and so Peeta pulled the bolt-cutters from his burlap sack, cutting the lock away in seconds. The puppies put up no protest whatsoever as they were moved from the cage to the carry case, but Katniss could not help but notice that sad sighs coming from Peeta.

"What is it?" she asked, although part of her already knew what his answer would be.

"I just… I wish we could help them all," he said, looking around at the remaining caged dogs. "It feels so wrong, leaving them here to die."

"Stop," said Thresh. "Focus on what we _can_ do." He threw his rucksack over his shoulder and said, "Let's get out of here."

Thresh gently pushed upon the door and looked around the corner. "It's clear," he said, but barely a second later, the lights in the corridor turned on, and an alarm started to wail. Heavy footsteps and shouting could be heard, and Thresh ducked back inside, into the dark relative safety of their room, pulling the door closed after him.

"What the hell—?" whispered Peeta.

This was it. They were going to be caught and she was going to be arrested, she knew it. The noise of the klaxon was agitating the beagle pups in their carrier, as well as the remaining dogs in their cages. Peeta was gripping her hand tightly, and she could hear his ragged breathing in the darkness. "Wait here," he whispered as he edged his way towards the door.

"Be careful," she whispered back in response, as his fingers left hers behind. She swallowed the lump that formed in her throat at the lack of contact, and could just about make out his shadow as he approached the small square of light spilling through the door's glass panel. Suddenly he ducked back down into shadow as the thunderous sound of footsteps came charging past. The sound seemed to get louder and louder, and Katniss held her breath until she realised it was the sound of her own pulse rushing in her ears. It took her by surprise when Peeta was back by her side, his hand resting between her shoulder blades.

"Someone sold us out." Thresh's harsh whisper cut through the darkness.

"Not necessarily," replied Peeta. "If they'd known we were coming they wouldn't have allowed us to get as far we had. They'd just close the doors on us and arrest us all."

"How are we going to get back?" Katniss whispered, hating how her worry was apparent even in her whisper.

Neither man answered at first. Then Katniss heard the distinct jangle of keys, before a small bunch were pressed in to her palm. "We're not," said Thresh. "You two are."

"What the fuck are you on about, man?" whispered Peeta urgently.

"We're not all getting out, it'll be an impossibility. But you have to, Peeta. You have responsibilities. I don't. I'll distract them, draw them away, and it will give you the chance to get out."

"Don't be a dick."

"Don't _you_ be a dick, Peeta. Get her out of here safely." He tapped the top of the beagles' cage. "Get _them_ out of here safely."

"Thresh…"

"Get back to the van. If you haven't heard from me after twenty minutes then go, ok?"

In the near darkness, Katniss could just about make out the two of them embracing for a moment before Thresh released him and swept her up in his arms. "Look after him," he whispered to her. "Don't let him try for any heroics. Just get out of here."

He released her and crept towards the door. "Be ready," he said, turning towards her and Peeta, who were still crouched down in the darkness. They watched as he gently opened the door and silently pulled it to. Peeta encouraged her to get to her feet, grasping the cage in front of him, and momentarily peered outside.

After a minute or two, they heard an almighty crash coming from nearby, followed shortly after by more crashing footsteps heading towards the source of the disturbance. Peeta seemed to be psyching himself up for the inevitable. He took three deep breaths, and he turned to her. "Ready?"

She nodded affirmation, unsure how ready she ever would be.

"Ok. Let's go."

He opened the door and slipped outside, Katniss following directly on his heels. Each of his footsteps rattled around the corridors like gunshots, and she cringed at how loud he was, imagining that the law would be on top of them at any moment. He jogged as fast as he was able while carrying the pups' cage and with the heavy burlap rucksack slung over one shoulder, and thus Katniss was easily able to keep up with him.

The labs seemed positively labyrinthine compared to when they arrived; around every corner Katniss prayed to see an open exit but expected to see a foe waiting to ensnare them. She was always wrong on both counts. From the crashing sounds in the distance, Thresh was still putting up a fight, destroying as much property as he could to buy them time. They had to get out before the police arrived. Security guards they could escape from, but once the police were on the scene, a perimeter would be set up and there would be no getting out.

Sticking as close to Peeta as she could, she almost cried in relief when they finally came across an exit that led back outside. Together they sidled up to the door. Peeta still carried the beagle pups, so he indicated to Katniss to try the door. "It might be alarmed," he warned her as she reached for it. "So be prepared to run."

Endless scenarios of them getting caught, of watching Peeta dragged away from her in handcuffs, of appearing in court and being sent down ran through her mind as she reached for the door handle. Steeling herself for a moment, she pushed down hard. It was locked. "What do we do?" she whispered desperately.

The cage of whimpering beagle puppies was handed to her, and he pulled a crowbar from the burlap sack. Putting it in position against the door, he looked up at her, and despite his face being almost entirely covered by the balaclava, she was terrified to notice the fear in his eyes clearly mirrored her own. "Katniss, this is likely to catch their attention. When we get outside, if the coast is clear, run straight to the fence. We don't have time to find where we came in from; it'll be quicker to cut a new exit. You carry the dogs, and I'll try and get to the fence first and cut a way through. Stick to the shadows as much as you can. I love you."

"I love you too," she responded, ashamed at how much her voice was shaking.

"Ready?" She nodded her response, and Peeta piled his strength against the crowbar, forcing the door open. As he predicted, more alarms began to sound. Security would be on their way; they had to get out now. "Go," he hissed to her, and she began to run.

Adrenaline took over, almost silencing the alarms. She could see Peeta charging up ahead, but she was encumbered by the beagle puppies and couldn't go as quickly. In the corner of the compound was an area mostly hidden in shadow by the trees on the other side of the chain link fence, and that was where he appeared to be heading. She risked a glance from side to side and was beyond grateful that no security guards appeared to be on the scene yet. By the time she reached Peeta, he had already used wire cutters to cut a sizeable hole, and he pulled back a corner of the chain link fence so that Katniss could dart through. Once she was safely outside the compound, he crawled through the hole as well. They were nowhere near where the van was parked, but had no choice but to head further in to the dark woods in order to stay clear of the eyes of security.

"What will happen to Thresh?" Katniss hissed into the darkness. Up ahead she could see Peeta stop in his tracks and look down towards the ground.

"I don't know," he said at last, before heading further into the cover of the trees. At that moment, Katniss noticed Peeta was limping very slightly.

"You ok?"

"Fine," he said quietly, although Katniss could hear the edge of pain, both physical and emotional, lacing his voice. He paused in his movements and held his arms out towards her. "I can take them," he said, indicating the puppies. She pressed the carrier into his arms and together they kept on making their way through the trees, Katniss wincing, as Peeta seemed to step on every dry twig and branch. The resultant cracks echoed through the cool night air, and she was convinced that at any moment the police would descend upon them.

Further and further into the woods they crept, until the floodlit laboratories behind them were entirely blocked from view and their progress through the trees hindered by the complete darkness. Peeta stopped moving suddenly, a sharp inhalation of breath indicating that he was hurt. "What is it?" Katniss asked him.

"Nothing."

"Don't tell me that. What have you done?"

"Nothing. I'll be fine. I just… I must have landed too heavily when we were running. I'll be fine."

"Peeta…."

"I'll be ok," he said with a finality that stopped Katniss from protesting again. "Just need to…. Get back to the van."

Despite their close proximity, she could barely see him, but she could hear his frantic breathing and he jumped slightly when she reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. "Peeta?"

"I…. I don't know where to go," he admitted at last.

A cold wind blew through the trees, and goose bumps were raised over Katniss' arms and the back of her neck that were only in part due to the sudden drop in temperature. "It's ok," she whispered to him. "I'll get us back. We need to get to the other side of the compound. If we can keep the lab constantly on our left, we should be able to circle round and get back to the van."

"If Thresh doesn't make it back, you'll need to drive."

Katniss could hear the embarrassment in his voice, and she squeezed his shoulder reassuringly before taking the lead. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Peeta limping very slightly, occasionally hissing as he took a step.

"Stop," she said. "Just, stop." She took the cage of puppies back from him and he immediately bent double, rubbing at his left leg. "What is it?"

"Nothing," he said after a moment's hesitation. "Just my own stupidity. I've been meaning to go and see the prosthetist for ages but… I just haven't had time. And I've had so much on my mind that... anything to do with me gets pushed to the bottom of the pile." He straightened up again, wincing as he did so. "I'll be ok. It's a little ill-fitting. Nothing life-threatening."

"You shouldn't have come out like this, Peeta."

"This was more important!" he said, his voice raising. Katniss quickly glanced over her shoulder, fearful that they had been heard. "I'm sorry," he said, his voice lowering. "But look at them," he said, placing a hand on top of the beagles' cage. "Look. They would have been cut up, injected, forced to smoke, operated on, force-fed pills, slowly and painfully poisoned… And none of it, not a single jot, would have benefitted human health, because we're not the same! What works for an animal doesn't work for a person, and certainly not when the illnesses have been artificially induced in a laboratory in the first place! Their lives would have been miserable, and they'd have just been killed at the end. We've saved them from that. What's a little discomfort of my own in comparison?"

Katniss looked down at the four tiny puppies in her arms and tried to picture them on an operating table. The idea made her shudder, and she blinked back the tears that were forming. "You're a good man, Peeta Mellark," she said. "The world could use a few more people like you."

In the dark, she could see the flicker of a smile upturn his lips, and he reached towards her, cupping the side of her face. "Let's keep moving," he said. "Don't worry about me."

With Peeta moving at such a slow pace, it took them nearly half an hour to get back to the van. Peeta secured the pups in the back then climbed into the passenger seat, while Katniss got into the driver's seat. She quickly glanced at her watch, and let out a deep breath. Thresh had twenty minutes—otherwise they would be driving away.

"I'm sorry," said Peeta into the darkness, after they had sat in silence for a few minutes.

"For what?" asked Katniss.

"Putting you in danger. I've been on so many rescues before, but never had to worry about… I mean, even when I was with Jenn I didn't feel like I do now, and I always used to think that if anything happened it wouldn't matter. But it does. It really does. When I was on my own, if I'd landed in prison, well, so what? But I'd never, ever, ever forgive myself if anything happened to you."

Katniss stayed silent as she listened to his confession, her heart swelling.

"Say something," he implored her.

"I don't know what to say," she replied.

"Then come here," he said, reaching towards her. He held her in his arms, and whispered in her ear, "I never want to let you go."

She pulled away slightly, looking deep into his cerulean eyes, before reaching her hand behind his neck and pulling him towards her. Their lips met, as Katniss kissed him once slowly, then drew away from him slightly. Their lips were almost brushing, and Katniss could feel the heat of his breath as she ran her tongue over her lips, moistening them.

"I love you," he whispered. "I love you so much."

She pressed her lips into his once more, deepening the kiss, and sighing into him as his tongue gently probed her own. "I love you, too," she sighed. The wind picked up outside, making the trees' branches creak. They would never hear someone approach in this weather, and the thought made her nervous. She glanced down at her watch. They had been in the car for just over ten minutes. "Do you think Thresh meant for us to wait twenty minutes from the time we got back here, or twenty minutes from the time he left us?"

Peeta didn't answer immediately. His hand dropped to grasp hers, and he turned to look out of the window. "Let's just wait a little longer, ok?"

She nodded, and squeezed his hand a little tighter, before the two of them lapsed into silence. She was lost in thought, in the worry of what could have happened to Thresh. Suddenly, a loud bang on the door pulled her immediately out of her reverie. Katniss looked up fearfully, expecting to see a uniformed officer before them. She laughed with relief when she saw Thresh's grinning face peering in at the window, and opened the door to him.

"You should have left ages ago," he said, as Katniss shifted over to sit on Peeta's lap. "So I guess I should be grateful for your terrible time-keeping."

"How'd did you get away?" asked Peeta.

Thresh shrugged, as he took the keys back from Katniss, and started up the engine. "Usual security guards. Over-fed and under-paid. They didn't give me any trouble and I managed to hide before the police showed. Took me a while to get back here though, the place ended up crawling with cops. They nearly got me as I crawled back through the fences, but none of them could keep up once we got into the woods."

"What happened? Who set off the alarms?"

"I don't know. They caught a few people, but I think at least half of us got away. Dogs ok?"

"They're fine," replied Peeta. He held tighter on to Katniss and squeezed her gently, saying, "Everything's fine."

As Thresh started to drive away, Katniss felt overcome with exhaustion. She leant closer into Peeta, resting her head on his shoulder. Everything was more than fine.  



	10. Comforted by Her Warmth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so endlessly sorry for the massive delay on this. I have no excuses whatsoever, other than RL being incredibly hectic, and a total lack of inspiration for the story.
> 
> I was planning on updating this next week on my birthday - because I always make cakes for my work colleagues on my birthday, and I can't make them for you guys - but I can provide you with Everlark smut instead. But I got excited and decided to do it now instead. Because, y'know...reasons.
> 
> Anyway, thank you all so much for your patience. Please do leave a review, as they may well help the next chapter appear a little faster this time, and please come and say hi on tumblr - my username is alatarielgildaen.
> 
> Thanks again, everyone!

## May

Katniss' birthday was fast approaching, and following the near disaster at the vivisection lab, Peeta was determined to make everything as perfect as possible. His focus had been mostly on re-homing the beagle puppies, but he remembered that she had once mentioned in passing how it might be fun to have a fancy dress party at some point, and so Peeta wanted to pull out all of the stops to give her a birthday party to remember.

After the final beagle had been adopted, and Finnick and Annie had been enlisted to help clear up the spare room where the beagles had been housed, Peeta confirmed the idea with Katniss.

"We'll have it here at my place," Peeta said. "There's more space, and if the weather holds out, we can maybe have a barbecue as well?"

"No question of that," said Finnick, entering the room and handing bottles of beer to everyone before he sank into the armchair and put his feet up on the coffee table. "I'm more than happy to offer my services and man that one."

"I don't mind doing it," said Peeta.

"No, you'll be on my arm all evening," said Katniss.

"Dressed as what, though?"

A thoughtful look crossed her face, replaced a moment later with a wide grin. "Heroes and villains," she said. "We can come up with a really good couples costume, I reckon."

Finnick sat up a little straighter. "Shotgun Han and Leia!"

"That's not fair!" protested Peeta.

"Too late, I've called it," grinned Finnick, settling back in the armchair and raising the beer bottle to his lips. "You'll have to be quicker than that to beat me."

"Yeah, but as hosts, we should really get first dibs—"

"It's ok," said Katniss. "We'll think of something good. And anyway…I've never _actually_ seen _Star Wars_ all the way through."

Peeta ignored Finnick's scandalised noise, but still shook his own head in mock despair. He wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to get over how few classic films Katniss had watched.

"Fine," he said at last, taking a hefty swig from his bottle. As Katniss sat down next to him, he put his arm around her waist and pulled her closer towards him. "And you owe me another film night," he grinned.

"Ugh, fine," she conceded. "You'll never be happy until you've made me sit through everything ever released in the 70s and 80s."

"They're called classics for a reason!"

"Sure thing, buster. Whatever makes you happy."

She curled up into him on the sofa, and at that moment, he felt more at peace than he had in a long time. The puppies were re-homed, he was in contact with his family once more, he was finally facing up to his own personal demons and insecurities, and it was all thanks to the woman he loved. He'd make this party perfect for her.

********

The day arrived, and just as Peeta had hoped, the sky was an endless, unbroken blue.

Katniss was still fast asleep, and so he slipped out of bed and pulled his prosthetic on as quickly and quietly as he could, so as not to disturb her. He quickly measured ingredients into a bowl—flour, vanilla, soy milk— and whisked them together, frying the batter into perfect crepes. A smile lifted the corners of his mouth as he slipped the crepes on to a plate, loading them with strawberries and chocolate ganache. He had made her this exact breakfast the morning after they had made love for the first time.

After putting the plate on a tray, Peeta opened his fridge and pulled out a bottle of Buck's Fizz. He popped the cork, and poured a flute, placing it next to the plate. Finally, he placed a handmade card, and a wrapped gift on the tray, and carried the whole lot back upstairs to Katniss.

She was just about stirring as he brought the tray to her. "Morning, beautiful," he said, as she yawned, stretched, and slowly sat up. "I thought you might like a decent wake-up call."

Her eyes widened as he set the tray on the bed in front of her. "This is all for me?" she asked.

"Mmm-hmm." he nodded. "Although I might put in a formal request for a bite or two." He perched on the edge of the bed and grinned as Katniss cut a huge piece and offered it to him. He opened his mouth and leaned in towards her, but at the last moment she snatched the fork away from him. And from the noises she made as she ate the morsel, she clearly enjoyed it.

"Open this," he added, picking up the gift and handing it towards her.

She quickly ate another forkful of the crepes, and took the present from Peeta, enthusiastically tearing the paper away. A warm smile crossed her face as she turned the book over in her hands. "It's beautiful," she breathed. She ran her hands over the faux-leather cover, pausing at the dandelion set into resin that was mounted in the middle.

"It's handmade," Peeta explained. "There's a guy who has a stall at the market in town every Saturday and he takes custom orders. The paper is recycled cotton, and doesn't easily tear, and the dandelion is from the bottom of the garden. I thought it'd be good, if you were out and about and had an idea for a story, you could write it down in this, instead of having to carry a laptop everywhere you go."

"It's perfect," she said, shaking her head a little in disbelief. "Perfect. Thank you so much."

"So… have I earned a bite of the pancakes?" he asked.

"Undoubtedly." She cut a slice of the crepe, and picked it up with her fingers, coating them in a thick layer of chocolate ganache, and held it up to Peeta's lips. He drew her fingers slowly into his mouth, sucking the sweet, rich sauce from them, and kissed each one of her digits as she withdrew them.

"Peeta," she whispered, and he understood in a heartbeat. He took the tray from her and placed it on the bedside cabinet. There would be time to eat later. For now, she had a very different type of hunger to be satiated.

Peeta crawled on the bed and hovered over her, pinning her wrists to the bed. He nuzzled into the crook of her neck, dragging his lips along her collarbone then up and over her jawline. Finally, he ran his tongue across the seam of her mouth before softly pressing his lips into hers. He held himself up over her, drinking in the sight of her dark hair fanning out across the pillow, her pupils dilated almost entirely to black, and her lower lip as she dragged her teeth over it.

"I'm all yours," he said, shifting his weight so that she would be able to feel his erection pressed into her through the duvet. "So, where do you want me, birthday girl?"

"Pretty much right where you are," she answered as a sly smile crossed her lips.

He returned her smile, and quickly pulled the duvet away from underneath him, settling himself down between her legs. He continued to pin her arms to the bed, and resumed placing kiss after kiss along the slender lines of her neck. She rolled her hips up, grinding her core against him, and with each undulating movement, he groaned into her skin, sucking and laving her with his tongue.

Pausing for a moment, he pushed up the cotton camisole she wore, exposing her breasts. Very slowly, he began to trail a series of kisses down her body, drawing one nipple into his mouth then the other.

It took him entirely by surprise when Katniss pushed him off of her, rolling him on to his back, straddling him moments later.

"You want to be in control?" he breathed, to which she nodded. "You'll get no complaints from me," he grinned as he ran his hands over her thighs. "I love it when you're in charge."

His eyes drifted to her panties, and he slowly dragged his thumbs closer towards her centre, pulling the thin piece of cotton to one side. A keening sound escaped his throat at the sight of her, and he repeatedly ran the pad of his thumb over the slick flesh, causing a pleasurable shudder to run through her body.

"More," she whined, and she raised herself off of him, quickly divesting herself of all clothes. Peeta grinned and followed suit, and Katniss climbed back on top of him, smiling wickedly before she lowered herself over his face. He reached up, wrapping his arms around her thighs and pulled her down.

She tasted sweet and musky, and they moaned in unison as her hips rocked over him in a steady rhythm. He ran his tongue over every part of her flesh, alternatively circling her clit and licking along the length of her slit.

As her breathing grew heavier, and the rocking of hips grew faster, he explored her body further, moving his hands from her thighs and up to the curve of her waist. Then he dropped them lower, squeezing her ass. Experimentally, he ran a finger between her cheeks, and he couldn't help but chuckle as she yelped when he made contact with her tight, puckered hole.

"Don't even think about it," she gasped as she grabbed him around the wrists and moved his hands around to the front, placing them over her supple breasts. She then wound one fist tightly into his hair, holding him in place, while she undulated her hips faster than ever. It only took a few more moments of him teasing her before she froze above him, her thighs clenching tightly on either side of his face. He slowed his strokes down, allowing her to ride through her orgasm, until she rolled off of him and collapsed on the bed beside him, breathless and glowing.

He rolled over, leaning up on arm to watch her. "You ok?" he asked her.

She grinned languidly and nodded.

"You ready for more?" he asked, running his fingertips down the length of her body, pausing just below her belly button.

"More?" she chuckled. "What about you?" She deftly wrapped her hand around his erection, slowly pumping him a few times.

His eyes fell closed at her first touch, but he soon pushed her hand away. "I can wait," he said. "It's _your_ birthday, Katniss. I'll do whatever you want."

She smiled and pushed him back onto his back. "I want _you_ ," she answered, straddling him once more, and as she lowered herself onto him, he could find absolutely no reason at all to protest. It was her birthday, after all.

********

Everything was ready for the guests to arrive; all that remained for Katniss and Peeta to do was to get into costume. He helped her get into her costume first. They had spent a good hour with him painting delicate flame accents over her arms and across the top of her chest, and finally he zipped up the back of her dress and stood back to admire her. The orange, red, yellow and gold shimmered with every movement, and as the sun streamed in through his bedroom window, catching the dress, she genuinely looked for a moment as if she were made of living flame.

"You're incredible," he breathed. "My girl on fire. I can't begin to tell you how much I fancy you."

She smiled demurely. "The feeling is mutual," she said. "You ready to get into yours, my brave adventurer?"

His smile froze on his face as he looked at the t-shirt and shorts laid out on his bed. The idea of going as Finn and his Flame Princess, and putting a yellow cape on Belle so that she could be Jake had seemed so great at the time. Snuggled up together on the sofa, watching _Adventure Time_ , it had felt like the most perfect costume idea in the world.

But now… he felt sick. He hadn't worn shorts in years. Gale would be there today. Peeta thought back to the last time he had spent any time with Katniss' oldest friend. He recalled so clearly the sickening comments that Gale had made regarding the Paralympics, and how he, Peeta, had merely smiled and nodded, completely unable to stand up for himself. Of course, when they had first discussed the possibility of the costumes, Peeta had panicked, but as always, Katniss had been ready to assuage his initial worries and had convinced him that it would work wonders for his confidence.

He wasn't so sure now.

With a feather-light touch, she stroked the side of his cheek. "You can do this," she said.

He nodded and dressed almost automatically, trying hard not to think about how exposed he felt. When he finally pulled the hat down over his ears, Katniss placed her hands on either side of his face and gently kissed his lips. "You look adorable," she said.

"Adorable?" he repeated with a nervous laugh. "You look _hot_. I'm not sure adorable is quite the look I wanted to go for."

"Well, you look it. Come on. I think I'm ready for a glass of wine." She picked up a plastic sword and handed it to Peeta. "Perfect," she grinned, giving him one last swift kiss, before turning on her heel and practically skipping downstairs.

He took one more deep breath, letting it out slowly, before he grabbed the yellow cape that was still on the bed and whistled for Belle. She came bounding in moments later, jumping up and licking Peeta's face as he bent down to put the cape around her.

"Come on, girl," he said as he roughly scratched her behind the ears and stood up. He caught their reflection in the mirror and tried not to pay any attention to the prosthetic that was on display. Ignoring the nagging worry, he went down to the kitchen to join Katniss.

She was perched on the edge of the kitchen table, clutching a bottle of Bucks Fizz. "Open this," she grinned, holding it out towards him.

"Yes, my lady," he answered, taking the bottle from her, easing the cork out until it made a satisfying _pop_. He picked up a champagne flute from the table and poured her a glass, and as he handed it to her, she hitched her skirt up and wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him closer towards her.

"Katniss," he breathed. "You're gonna get me all worked up again."

"Maybe that's my intention," she answered, taking a slow, seductive sip from the fluted glass.

"Dammit, woman," he growled, running his hands over the gentle curve of her waist. He leaned in towards her, but at that moment a loud knock at the front door made them both jump. His nerves returned ten-fold, and he swallowed heavily, glancing over his shoulder towards the door. Belle had already bounded down the hallway and was barking excitedly at the guest. "You want me to go?" asked Katniss.

For a moment he considered taking her up on the offer. But he couldn't hide forever; he may as well get it over with. He shook his head, and placed a kiss upon her forehead, lingering there just a fraction longer than he usually would. "Can you open me a beer?" he said as he finally let go of her. "I think I'm gonna need it."

She smiled as she jumped down from the table and walked to the fridge. He left the kitchen and walked down the hallway, pausing once more before he opened the front door. He smiled in relief as he saw who it was. Annie was waiting on the doorstep, a beautifully wrapped parcel in her hands. "Hey, Peet," she grinned, leaning towards him and placing a kiss on his cheek. "Where's the birthday girl?"

"In the kitchen," he answered, looking her up and down in confusion. She was wearing tight black pants and boots, a white shirt and a black waistcoat. A toy gun was strapped to her hip. "You're Han," he said in a deadpan voice.

She smiled and nodded almost apologetically.

"He hasn't, has he?" asked Peeta, as he realised who Finnick must have come dressed as.

"I'm afraid so. He insisted. He's just getting the beers."

Peeta stepped out on to the porch and he didn't know whether to laugh or despair. Finnick was leaning into the boot of his car, and barely an inch of Finnick's bronzed flesh wasn't exposed. When Finnick had suggested that he and Annie go as Han and Leia, Peeta hadn't ever considered the possibility that his best mate would turn up to the party wearing nothing but a gold bikini and a dog leash.

Trying to maintain a straight face, he slipped his fingers into his mouth and wolf-whistled loudly. Finnick looked up, a crate of beer in his arms, and slammed the car boot shut before strutting over towards Peeta, a feminine swagger to his hips. "I'm flattered," he said as he walked straight past Peeta. "But I'm spoken for."

Peeta chuckled as he followed Finnick back into the kitchen. Finnick's ridiculous outfit would at least take attention away from himself, and as the two men began to set up the barbecue, Peeta felt himself relax at last.

It didn't take long for the house to be full of people; some that Peeta knew and recognised, some that he had never seen before. He panicked a little when Gale arrived, dressed as Maverick from _Top Gun_. Peeta couldn't help but notice how the other man's eyes immediately drifted to his prosthetic and widened in surprise. He did his best to ignore the stares, and instead turned to Prim and Rue who were dressed as two characters he didn't recognize. When asked about their costumes, Rue immediately launched into a highly enthusiastic speech about a cartoon called _The Legend of Korra_ , and how for so long it had been obvious that these two characters were perfect for each other, and how, even better, they were now _canon_ , and how amazing it was to have a proper representation of actual gay characters on children's TV. She barely had time to pause for breath, and by the time she had finished, Gale had disappeared, much to Peeta's relief.

Jo caused as much of a stir with her costume—or rather, her lack thereof—as Finnick. She had arrived at the same time as Gale, but had immediately vanished upstairs into the bathroom. She emerged a half hour later, covered head to toe in blue body paint, wearing nothing but a skimpy blue thong and a pair of blue pasties covering her nipples. Her slicked back hair had been dyed bright red for the occasion.

Unsure of where to look, Peeta desperately tried to maintain eye contact with her and not let his own eyes wander as she sidled up to him.

"Did I miss a spot at all?" she asked, turning her back on him.

He quickly ran his eyes over her. There was indeed a small patch of flesh-coloured skin in the very centre of her back. "Erm... just a small one, right in the middle."

"Would you mind?" she asked as she handed him a makeup sponge and a pot of blue face paint.

He nodded and took the paint from her, trying to cover the spot as quickly as possible.

"Who's the golden body outside?" she asked, nodding towards where Finnick was stood in front of the barbecue.

"Finnick," he answered, "and before you get too excited, he's very much taken."

"Just because he's on a diet, doesn't mean he can't look at the menu," she grinned, grabbing a beer and knocking half of it back in a single glug. "Thanks, by the way."

As she walked away, the temptation to stare at her half-naked ass proved too strong. "Jesus..." he whispered to himself, downing the remainder of his drink.

"Are you checking her out?"

Katniss, stealthy as ever, was stood right by his side, and he spluttered on the dregs of his beer, and quickly wiped his blue-stained fingers on his shorts.

"No! I mean...I... you know I have eyes only for you, right?"

"I can't believe her."

"Are you angry?" Peeta asked.

She seemed to deflate a moment later. "No," she answered. "Not angry. Just... I dunno. I'm being silly."

"Because she's stealing your thunder?"

"No. It's not even that. Or maybe it is just a little."

"Do you want me to ask her to cover up?"

Katniss shook her head, looking a little glum.

"Do you want a cuddle?"

She nodded and put her arms around his neck, and he pulled her in close. "I'm sorry," she mumbled into his neck. "I don't know why I'm feeling so annoyed."

"You don't have to apologise," he said, planting several kisses on the top of her head. "It's because you're sweet, and pure, and perfect."

"Hardly pure," she said, half laughing. "Not when I think about what we did earlier."

"For me you are," he said, holding her even tighter.

A knock at the door caught their attention, and Katniss pulled away from him. "I'll get it," she said.

Of all the guests that had arrived so far, none of them seemed to cause Katniss as much happiness as the older man who had just turned up wearing everyday clothes. As soon as she opened the door to him, she threw her arms around his neck and said, "I didn't think you'd come!"

He pushed her away gruffly, and Katniss led him into the kitchen. His eyes lit up appreciatively as he eyed the selection of drinks left out on the side. He grabbed a bottle of whisky and a tumbler, and poured himself a generous measure.

"Peeta, this is Haymitch," grinned Katniss.

Peeta held his hand out towards the older man, a wide smile on his face. "I've heard so much about you," he said, shaking his hand firmly. This was the man Katniss looked up to more than anyone. After her father's death, Haymitch, a family friend, had become a surrogate father figure to Katniss. He had encouraged her talents, had stepped in to look after her when her mother's mind began to shut down, and had supported her decision to become a writer. In a strange, roundabout way, therefore, he was responsible for Peeta meeting her in the first place.

"You too," he answered, rooting around in Peeta's freezer for some ice. He made a satisfied sound as he found what he was after, dropping a couple of cubes into his glass. "I hope you're looking after her."

"I do my best, sir," he grinned. "But she's just as good at looking after me."

He seemed happy with the answer, a slight smirk crossing his face, and Katniss' own smile widened further. "What have you come as, Haymitch? I've been trying to work it out."

He looked at their own costumes, and glanced around at some of the others. "What's the theme again?" he asked.

"Heroes and villains," answered Katniss.

"Then I'm a serial killer. They look like normal people right?"

"Haymitch!" Katniss gasped, half-laughing.

"Fine. An off-duty fireman, then. Take your pick."

She threw her arms around his neck once again. "It's good to see you again, Haymitch."

"You too, kiddo. How old are you now? Thirty?"

"I'm twenty-nine, thank you."

"Same difference."

"I'll leave you two to catch up," said Peeta. He swept his arm around her waist and kissed her forehead, and inclined his head briefly towards Haymitch before making his way outside.

The smells of the cooking food hit him straight away, and his stomach rumbled appreciatively and he headed towards the gathering crowds. Jo was flirting unashamedly with Finnick, who was giving as good as he was getting.

"You ok, Annie?" asked Peeta. Annie was watching the flirtatious display with a resigned look on her face.

"I'm fine," she said, although Peeta couldn't help but notice the uncharacteristic bite in Annie's tone. "It's a good thing I trust him implicitly, right?"

He put his arm around her shoulders and gave her a reassuring squeeze. "Once everything's cooked up and you can finally drag him away from the fire, he'll be all yours."

A shy smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "Thanks, Peeta," she said as she tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "You're right. It's just… I don't know how anyone can be so brazen."

"Really?" countered Peeta, laughing as his eyebrows shot up his forehead. He nodded towards Finnick and added, "Are you sure you don't?"

She burst out laughing. "You're right," she repeated, glancing back towards Finnick. "Thanks again."

Just as Peeta predicted, the moment Finnick called out, "Food's ready!" and plated everything up for people to help themselves, he sought out Annie, and the two became utterly inseparable.

The majority of guests began to gravitate towards the incredible spread, and Peeta's hunger was increasing by the second when he heard a voice that almost immediately made him lose his appetite.

"Is there any real food here?" asked Gale.

"Real food?" said Finnick, looking around at the vast spread that was laid out. "Nope. We only have imaginary food. We definitely don't eat real food around here."

"Ha ha," Gale deadpanned. Peeta couldn't help but notice the other man's nose wrinkle slightly as he looked over the various burgers and kebabs, stuffed peppers, corn on the cob, and different types of salads laid out. He had to bite his tongue and was grateful when Katniss arrived by his side, a wide smile on her face.

"This is perfect, thank you, angel," she said, wrapping her arms around his waist, and planting a kiss on his cheek. She stumbled very slightly, leaning most of her weight into him.

"Are you drunk, Katniss?" he asked her, chuckling very slightly.

"No!" she protested, stumbling once again. "Maybe," she amended with a giggle. "Blame Haymitch. He made me do it."

"But you're having a good time, yeah?"

"The best," she grinned, kissing him once more. "I couldn't hope for anything more."

Peeta swept her into his arms and pressed a long, lingering kiss onto her soft lips. As he swept his tongue over hers, he caught the tang of the whisky she had been supplied by Haymitch, mixed with the rich, heady sweetness of dark chocolate. She had clearly been nibbling at one of the triple chocolate cupcakes he had created at her request, in lieu of a larger birthday cake.

He quickly glanced around. With everyone's attention firmly on the food, surely no one would notice if the two of them disappeared for a while? Katniss was obviously thinking along the same lines as him, as she caused his stomach to do a backflip when she whispered in his ear, "Fancy a quickie?"

He didn't need asking twice. Taking her by the hand, he marched her straight inside and upstairs. No sooner had they closed the bedroom door, then Katniss grabbed the front of Peeta's t-shirt and pushed him firmly against the wall, kissing every uncovered inch of his skin. In one deft movement, Peeta turned them around so that Katniss was pinned against the wall. He pulled her skirt to her hips, and slid his fingers into her panties. She was already wet, and as his fingers grazed along her clit, she moaned and bucked into him, her eyes falling closed as he circled the engorged nub of flesh.

"Now, Peeta," she whispered urgently as she pushed his hands away from her and nimbly stepped out of her underwear, while she fumbled clumsily with his shorts, pushing both them and his underwear down to free his erection.

She raised one leg up and wrapped it around his waist, pulling him closer towards her centre, and they groaned in unison as he entered her, and lifted her off the ground, holding her steady as she wrapped both legs around him. Her fingers raked across his shoulders and with each thrust she gasped his name into his ear.

"Yes, Peeta," she whispered, and as she slid her fingers underneath his hat, and pulled gently on his curly locks, he felt a surge of pleasure in the pit of his stomach.

A sudden creaking of the staircase caused both of them to freeze, as someone went to the bathroom. Peeta looked deep into Katniss' flame-lined grey eyes, and they sparkled mischievously as she slowly began to grind her hips into him.

"Katniss, we'll get caught," he whispered to her, although he could not help but massage her thighs as she undulated into him, encouraging every movement.

"Fuck me, Peeta," she whispered back, pulling harder on his hair, and pressing desperate kisses along his jaw and into the crook of his neck.

"Shit, Katniss," he breathed, as he began to thrust into her once more with an agonising slowness. He kept the gentle, steady pace until the creaking staircase told them that they were once again alone upstairs, and Katniss begged him to fuck her hard and fast.

He came just moments before her, and she muffled his heady groans with her own frantic kisses. "I love you. I love you so much," he repeated over and over as he kissed her lips, her neck, her collarbone… every inch of flesh he could reach.

He would have given anything to be able to curl up beside her, hold her body next to his as the two of them dozed off in each other's arms, but such a fantasy was entirely out of the question. Katniss was already putting her panties back on and smoothing out the creases in her dress.

"Whenever you're ready," she winked at him.

He was still breathless as he redressed and followed her back downstairs. They headed straight for the kitchen and Peeta grabbed a bottle of beer for himself, and poured a glass of wine for Katniss.

"In my day," said a gruff voice from over his shoulder, "we'd roll in haystacks. And we definitely wouldn't dream of sneaking off in the middle of a party."

Even as he turned around, he felt his face food with colour. He watched as Haymitch swirled the dregs of a whisky around the bottom of a tumbler and knocked it back. "I'm…err…I'm really sorry, sir…" he began, stumbling and stammering over every syllable.

But Haymitch didn't appear angry. On the contrary, the older man's eyes were sparkling and there was a definite smirk on his face. "You can get me a top up any time you want," he said, handing Peeta the empty glass.

It was with a great deal of relief that he wasn't going to be facing any more awkward questioning that Peeta generously refilled Haymitch's glass and pressed it into the other man's hand with a sheepish grin.

His and Katniss' not-so-secret tryst had earned him quite an appetite, and he went back outside, the smell of the barbecue making him salivate. He piled his plate high before he caught sight of Gale hanging around near the pig enclosure. He couldn't quite explain why, but the sight made him feel rather uneasy. With a deep breath, he picked his way through the crowds of people until he was stood beside Gale.

"You having a good time?" Peeta asked.

"Uh-huh," Gale replied. He knocked back half of his bottle of beer in a single swig, then nodded towards Peeta's prosthetic. "You kept that under wraps."

"Yeah, well, it's not really anyone's business but mine."

Gale chuckled to himself and took another large swig from his bottle. "This is quite a place you've got here," he said as he looked towards the woods at the end of Peeta's property.

"Thank you," said Peeta, taking a cautious sip of beer.

"I'm curious as to why you decided to turn it into a zoo, though."

The biting tone in Gale's voice was clear, and Peeta had to take a deep, calming breath before answering. "It's not a zoo," he said. "Zoos are places that take free animals and put them into captivity so that the public can pay and gawk at them. I took captive animals that would otherwise have been brutally killed, and have given them the chance to live their entire lives in peace. Bit of a difference."

"If you say so," said Gale. Peeta couldn't help but notice how the other man's eyes kept drifting down to his prosthetic, and he shifted his weight uncomfortably.

"Well, if you're ok, I should probably get back to Katniss," he said after a while, to break the awkward silence. He had hardy touched the food on his plate, but his appetite had greatly dissipated, and he left his plate to one side as he sought out his girlfriend. Glancing back over his shoulder, he saw that Gale had remained next to the pigs, and the uneasy feeling in his stomach increased.

He shook the feeling away and joined Katniss, who was getting more and more unsteady on her feet. But she was clearly having a great deal of fun, and Peeta was more than happy to keep supplying her with wine, until a shrill voice caught his attention.

"Gale, stop!" Prim's voice rang out over the garden. He looked around for her and found her over by the pigs' enclosure. Setting his beer down on the patio, he jogged over towards her.

"You ok, Prim?"

"Peeta, I tried to make him stop—"

She looked distressed and upset. A stark contrast to the amused smirk on Gale's face. "What did you do?" he demanded.

"Lighten up, man, nothing bad. They loved it."

"What did you do?" he repeated, kneeling down in the hay beside Kage, the smaller of the two pigs. He was chewing on something. On the ground below him was a half-eaten sandwich. The card sandwich packet was still in Gale's hand, and Peeta felt a ripple of horror run through him as he read 'B.L.T.' on the packaging. He turned back towards Kage. A sliver of pink flesh was hanging from the pig's mouth, and he retched violently. "Why would you do this?" he asked, barely able to form the words.

"Oh, come on, it's not that bad. I bought the sarnie on the train, because I just wanted to make sure I had something decent to eat today, and they seemed jealous, so I thought I'd share the love."

What little food Peeta had eaten tried yet again to make a reappearance, and it took all of his focus to quell the rising nausea. Never had he expected that Gale could do something so low. "Why would you do this?" he repeated, much more forcefully this time, quickly wiping his eyes on the back of his hand.

"Seriously, man, no harm done. They're alright."

"No harm done?" Peeta replied, getting angrier by the second. "No harm? You telling me no harm was done to the pig that ended up in that sandwich? Are you telling me that there's no harm in turning my pigs to cannibalism? What planet do you live on?"

His outburst caught several guests' attention, including Katniss. She, along with a handful of other people soon joined Peeta by his side.

"What happened?" she asked, slurring her words very slightly.

Peeta pointed to the sandwich box. "Gale fed that to my pigs."

She looked between the empty packaging, the softly grunting pigs, and Gale, who was still smirking, and she appeared to sober up instantly. "Get out," she said, her tone dangerously low.

"Aww, come on Catnip—"

"Don't call me that."

"It was a joke!"

"A piss-poor excuse for one."

"You know I didn't mean anything by it!"

"To be honest, Gale, I don't know what you mean by anything these days," she said, and she grabbed her mobile phone from out of her bag, quickly tapping a number onto the screen. A few seconds later she said, "Hello, yes, I'd like to book a taxi, please," and stormed away from the group. Peeta watched her walk away, wanting to follow her but still rooted to the spot with horror.

"Can't you go and calm her down?" Gale said, looking towards Peeta.

The image of that pink strip of flesh being eaten up by Kage ran through Peeta's mind and he shuddered. "Fuck you," he said quietly.

"You what?"

"You heard me. Fuck you. I've tried so _fucking_ hard to like you. I've tried to find the good in you. I thought that if Katniss could see it, it had to be there somewhere, but no. I was right about you from the moment I met you. I called you a cunt then, and I'm saying it again now. What you just did was un-fucking-forgiveable."

Peeta bent down and scratched Kage behind his ears. The pig rolled over onto his side, making contented snuffling noises, and Peeta fought hard against the rising nausea, together with the urge to punch Gale's smug face. At that moment, Katniss reappeared. "Right," she said. "I've booked you a taxi to take you to the station. It'll be here in twenty minutes. I think you can wait out the front for it."

"Catnip—"

"I said you can wait out the front. I don't think I can be any clearer. Goodbye, Gale."

Peeta looked over his shoulder towards Katniss. Her mouth was set in a defiant, straight line, her arms crossed over her chest. Gale opened his mouth once or twice, closed it again and then walked away, up the garden and towards the house.

"Right," she said, as soon as Gale was out of earshot. "Let's get this party on the go again. Who's up for shots?"

"Tequila!" shouted Finnick, clapping his hands together.

"Anything but tequila," Katniss called after his retreating form.

She knelt down beside Peeta and gave Kage a belly rub, and seconds later Jables laid down beside his brother, clearly jealous of all the attention. "You ok?" she asked.

Peeta nodded. "You?"

She let out a long breath. "Surprisingly, yes."

"I didn't want this to happen on your birthday," he said.

Katniss shrugged. "It's been a long time coming. Gale and I have grown apart. It happens. I should have said something to him ages ago. If he ever feels like apologising, maybe I'll talk to him. But until then… he can stay clear."

"I'm sorry," said Peeta.

"For what?"

Peeta shrugged slightly. "I never wanted to be the reason for anyone to end a friendship."

"And I never wanted a friend of mine to become such a hurtful person. Forget him, Peeta. You did nothing wrong."

Peeta smiled, and entwined his fingers with hers. He pressed his lips to each of her fingers in turn. "I promise you, Katniss Everdeen, that this minor blip will not ruin your day. In fact, I promise that the rest of your day will be nothing short of perfection." He leaned in towards her, and drew her lower lip into his mouth, savouring the little whine that she gave as he gently grazed his teeth over her.

"Oi, get over here, lovebirds!" Finnick's shout interrupted them. "I have tequila, and I'm not taking no for an answer!"

Katniss grinned widely. "What were you saying about the rest of the day being perfect?"

"After this, it will be," he replied, helping her to her feet. With one final scratch to Kage's belly, the two lovers re-joined the festivities.  



End file.
